Table of contents for 1427 in The Week

What happened The second-largest bank collapse in US history sent shockwaves across financial markets. The victim was Silicon Valley Bank (SVB), America’s 16th biggest commercial bank, which had more than $200bn in assets. It was felled by a classic bank run, caused by having so much of its money tied up in long-dated Treasury bonds. These delivered good returns when interest rates were low, but became a liability when rates rose and struggling businesses started withdrawing more money from the bank. Last week, SVB revealed that, having been left short of cash, it had had to sell bonds early at a loss and planned to sell shares to mend its finances. The news led customers to rush for the exits. Within 48 hours, regulators had to intervene and close the…

So that’s it, then, said the Daily Mail. BBC impartiality is dead. If it’s acceptable for one of the Beeb’s leading presenters “to equate Government policy with the rise of 1930s Nazism, then no political smear is off-limits”. Last week, Gary Lineker described the Illegal Migration Bill on Twitter as “an immeasurably cruel policy directed at the most vulnerable people in language that is not dissimilar to that used by Germany in the 30s”. BBC director-general Tim Davie “rightly” suspended Lineker: it was an “offensive slur” on a policy that millions support. But faced with a walkout by Lineker’s BBC football colleagues – which saw the usual sporting programming severely reduced – Davie caved in. Lineker “will be back on air without so much as a slap on the wrist”,…

British tourists, who were branded too grotty for Lanzarote. The head of the Canary Island’s local government said that its resorts had become overly reliant on “mass market” holidaymakers from the UK, and should be focusing on “higher quality” visitors from Germany “who spend more when they are here”. Meta, the firm that owns Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp, which announced plans to cut 10,000 more jobs. In a memo, Mark Zuckerberg said that Meta had had a “humbling wake-up call” in 2022, when it experienced a sharp slowdown in revenue.…

Amsterdam Brothel spat: Resident groups in Amsterdam have challenged the city’s plans for a multistorey “erotic centre”, with restaurants, entertainment spaces and accommodation for about 100 sex workers. The proposed building is part of a plan to relocate roughly half the brothels in the city’s red-light district, in response to complaints that the behaviour of tourists there makes life a misery for residents. But now groups and businesses, including the European Medicines Agency, that sit close to the three potential sites, are raising objections. Local officials say concerns about noise and nuisance are misplaced, as all the activity will take place indoors. Karlsruhe, Germany Nord Stream probe: When the Nord Stream pipelines that run under the Baltic Sea were ruptured by deep sea explosions in September, some pointed the finger…

1 Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God), written and performed by Kate Bush2 Town Called Malice by Paul Weller, performed by The Jam3 Thank You for the Music by Benny Andersson and Björn Ulvaeus, performed by Abba4* Tainted Love by Ed Cobb, performed by Soft Cell5 This Is Me by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul, performed by Keala Settle and The Greatest Showman ensemble6 Dignity by Ricky Ross, performed by Deacon Blue7 The Man by Taylor Swift and Joel Little, performed by Taylor Swift8 Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau (Land of My Fathers) by Evan James and James James, performed by Welsh rugby fans at the Six Nations Championship in 2013 Book: Little Women by Louisa May Alcott Luxury: a photo album * Choice if allowed only one record…

Oxford might seem an unlikely focal point for a global conspiracy theory – but that’s what it has become. In November last year, the city’s council approved a six-month trial of a scheme designed to alleviate congestion. Under the plans, new traffic filters are to be introduced on six main roads. Monitored by automatic numberplate readers, these filters will introduce fines of up to £70 for drivers from outside Oxfordshire who use these roads during peak periods (Oxford residents will be allowed fine-free peak-time access for 100 days a year). The city’s council has been careful to avoid conflating this plan with its separate aspirations to pursue the goals of the 15-minute city, but in vain. Social media has been awash with claims that officials want to turn Oxford into…

Let’s not get hysterical about China Max Boot The Washington Post In “ultra-partisan” America, it’s a relief when Democrats and Republicans agree on something, says Max Boot in The Washington Post. But we shouldn’t mistake consensus for wisdom. Sometimes, it just means politicians are “falling prey to a collective delusion”. In 1964, for instance, congress voted almost unanimously to authorise military action against North Vietnam, dragging America into a disastrous war. Another ill-fated campaign – the invasion of Iraq – was supported by large bipartisan majorities. This history is worth keeping in mind amid the current debate about China. There was something “disturbingly one-sided” about the recent first hearing of a committee set up by congress to address US-China relations. All four witnesses “urged the hardest of hard lines against…

Nasa scientists have joined calls for a global treaty to ensure that Earth’s orbit does not become dangerously clogged by “space junk”. This floating debris is made up of everything from flakes of paint to abandoned satellites – and every year, more of it accumulates as the space industry grows. There are more than 9,000 satellites in space now; it is estimated that by 2030, there could be more than 60,000. The US Space Surveillance Network is tracking more than 27,000 man-made objects in space, including 3,000 satellites; but there are believed to be 100 trillion more that are untracked. The vast majority of these are very small, but as they are all moving very fast – reaching speeds of more than 17,500mph – even a pea-sized object has the…

In the past 40 years, so many different weight-loss regimes have been urged on the public, I can “map my life” through them, said Hadley Freeman in The Sunday Times. When I was growing up in the 1980s, “the cool women did Jane Fonda workouts, the chic ones did the cottage cheese diet and everyone’s mum bought books by Rosemary Conley”. In the 1990s, we had the low-fat diet, followed in the 2000s by Dr Atkins’s low-carb diet, the 5:2 diet, and so on. None has worked in the long term, because they all boil down to the same self-denying ordinance: eat less; move more. So it is unsurprising that a new drug, which promises effortless weight loss, is causing excitement. Originally designed to treat type 2 diabetes, semaglutide (marketed…

“Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying as an income tax refund.”F.J. Raymond, quoted in Forbes “All the world’s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.”Seán O’Casey, quoted in The Knowledge “I always feel it’s not wise to violate rules until you know how to observe them.”T.S. Eliot, quoted on The Athletic “War is a series of catastrophes that results in a victory.”Georges Clemenceau, quoted in The Guardian “I wish I could buy you for what you’re really worth. Then sell you for what you think you’re worth.”Mickey Mantle to fellow baseball player Joe Pepitone, quoted in The New York Times “Live not for battles won / Live not for The-End-of-the-Song / Live in the along.”Gwendolyn Brooks, quoted in the Los Angeles…

To The Daily Telegraph Gary Lineker’s claim that Channel migrants are “the most vulnerable people” shows a lack of understanding of the background of those seeking to enter this country illegally. They are, in the main, only vulnerable because they are risking their lives crossing the Channel in unsuitable small boats. Perhaps Mr Lineker and others who oppose the Government’s proposals could explain why a large percentage of Channel migrants are from Albania and other safe countries. Stephen Howey, Woodford Green, Essex To The Daily Telegraph Damian Green MP says the Government is doing the right thing on immigration, and that its plan will encourage genuine asylum seekers. Speaking from personal experience, I believe this to be deceitful. With the exception of the successful Homes for Ukraine scheme, it is…

by Sarah Thomas Serpent’s Tail 288pp £14.99 The Week Bookshop £11.99 Cracking open this “classy” debut will “produce a titillating sensation familiar to viewers of the hit series The White Lotus”, said Claire Lowdon in The Sunday Times. On page one, we learn there has been a death – and the rest of the novel follows the events leading up to it. Melanie, the narrator, is private tutor to Alex, daughter of Russian billionaires. As she tutors Alex – in the Alps, in Monaco, and on a “mega-yacht in the Maldives” – Melanie learns “a great deal” about her family. Sarah Thomas, a former tutor to the super-rich, has written a “hot holiday read to brighten up the last few weeks of winter”. Thomas skilfully captures both the “mind-blowing excess”…

Denzil Forrester at Stephen Friedman Gallery Equally reminiscent of both 1920s German expressionism and the energetic street art that covered the walls of Bristol, Liverpool and London in the 1980s, Denzil Forrester’s paintings are always exciting. Grenada-born Forrester (b.1956) began his career as an artist sketching in nightclubs and shebeens. Many of his pictures revisit that era: when he depicts riotous club scenes, directional lines echoing the frantic rhythms of the music, or a customer carefully selecting a disc on a pub jukebox, you can almost smell the stale beer and second-hand smoke. Forrester, then, is no nostalgic – and nor is he an apologist for our own times. The centrepiece here in With Q is a painting based on events in 2020, when police strip-searched a black schoolgirl they…

A tour of the Rhine Explore the river from Switzerland to the Netherlands by train and boat. From £1,745pp full board, including guide, transport and Edinburgh flights. 01904-521936, greatrail.com. Depart 15 May. Windmill in Anglesey Spend a week of the Easter holidays in a windmill on the Isle of Anglesey, with views across the picturesque Welsh countryside. From £835. 0345-498 6900, cottages.com. Arrive 31 March. Hotel suite in Cyprus Stay at the Holiday Village Aliathon on the west coast of Cyprus, close to Unesco sites. From £680pp for 7 nights, all incl. (including London flights). 020-3451 2688, firstchoice.co.uk. Depart 22 April. Easter in Stockholm Make the most of the Easter break at Freys Hotel in Stockholm, a short walk from the popular King’s Garden. From £188pp for 3 nights, room…

TikTok: UK ban? Parliament’s TikTok account was shut down last year after MPs raised concerns about the Chinese-owned video app’s links to Beijing. But so far, Britain hasn’t followed the EU and US in banning its use on all government devices, said Emilio Casalicchio on Politico. That may soon change: experts at GCHQ’s National Cyber Security Centre have reportedly “assessed the app and found risks to sensitive information”. PM Rishi Sunak has hinted at a ban. If so, could a wider curb on the wildly popular app be on the cards? No one is ruling it out, said Nicholas Cecil in the Evening Standard. The former US president, Donald Trump, attempted it; and India has already outlawed TikTok – a fact noted by Britain’s Security Minister, Tom Tugendhat, who has…

Jes Staley JPMorgan Chase “didn’t pull any punches” last week when it launched its lawsuit against Jes Staley, said Harry Wilson on Bloomberg. The Wall Street bank aims to claw back more than $80m of past pay from its former head of private banking, citing repeated “acts of disloyalty” and “intentional and outrageous conduct” in failing to disclose his ties with the late paedophile financier Jeffrey Epstein. It also aims to make Staley cover any payouts in two related lawsuits faced by the bank. Staley, who quit JPM in 2013 and later became CEO of Barclays, has denied knowledge of Epstein’s crimes. Barclays, which parted company with Staley in 2021 and is now embroiled in a Financial Conduct Authority probe, is staying “silent” on the issue. “Clawbacks of pay from…

What happened The Illegal Migration Bill – aimed at deterring migrants from crossing the Channel in small boats – passed its second reading in the Commons this week by 312 votes to 250. The bill, which would put a responsibility on the Home Secretary to detain and swiftly deport irregular migrants to the UK, was criticised by several Tory MPs including former PM Theresa May, who said that people smugglers would simply find other ways to get people to the UK. No Tories voted against the bill, but May and others abstained. Last week, Rishi Sunak travelled to Paris for a summit with President Macron, where the issue of cross-Channel migration was at the top of the agenda. Following the meeting – presented as a chance to reset Anglo-French relations…

Alcopops, digital cameras, cooking apples, superking-sized cigarettes, non-film DVDs and non-chart CDs have been dropped from the basket of goods that the Office for National Statistics uses to calculate consumer price inflation. The items deemed outmoded (based on household surveys) have been replaced by home security cameras, electric bikes, tortilla wraps and frozen berries. Fashionistas may not eat much of it in real life, but they are going wild for food-themed clothing, The Times reports. One farfalle-print jacket, made by the New York label Rachel Antonoff, has sold out and earned cult status as the “pasta puffer”; while the British label JW Anderson is selling fleeces and £560 tracksuit bottoms covered in apple motifs.…

Jeremy Hunt said that the resilience of the British economy was “proving the doubters wrong” as he delivered his first Budget on Wednesday. The Chancellor reported that the UK is not expected to go into recession this year, and that inflation is on course to fall to 2.9% by the year-end. At the heart of his Budget were efforts to get more people back to work. He said he would be gradually extending the 30 hours of free childcare available to working parents, so that by 2025 it can be claimed for all under-fives (currently it can only be claimed for two- and three-year-olds). On pensions, he abolished entirely the cap on the amount that people can save tax free in their pension, and increased the amount people can put…

North Slope, Alaska Oil go-ahead: The Biden administration has risked alienating swathes of Democrat voters by approving a new oil-drilling project on federal land in Alaska. The $8bn Willow Project, run by ConocoPhillips, is expected to produce up to 180,000 barrels a day from 199 wells; burning this oil will generate 9.2 million tonnes of carbon a year (equivalent to two million more cars on the road). Added to that, the project will involve the building of hundreds of miles of roads and pipelines, a gravel mine and a large processing plant. On the campaign trail in 2020, Biden pledged to ban new oil and gas leasing on public lands and waters. White House officials argued that he’d had little choice but to allow the drilling, as ConocoPhillips already owned…

“For decades now, our history curriculum has been dominated by the Second World War. There are, of course, good reasons for that. But the downside is that whenever progressives want to smear their political opponents by drawing historical parallels, they can only ever think of the Nazis. US Republicans, gender-critical feminists, the UK’s government – they all remind them of the Nazis. Therefore, I urge schools to start teaching our children about other great monsters from history. Wouldn’t it make a nice change if people likened Suella Braverman to, say, the brutal Tang dynasty empress Wu Zetian, or to Isabella I of Castile, who established the Inquisition?” Michael Deacon in The Daily Telegraph…

Smartphones are dragging children down John Burn-Murdoch Financial Times Across the Western world, “something is going very wrong for teenagers”, says John Burn-Murdoch. The rapid decline in their mental health is startling. The share of US high school students who say their life often feels meaningless has doubled in the past decade. In the same period, rates of depression among 15- to 24-year-olds in France have quadrupled. A similar uptick appears in all the graphs tracking teens’ negative feelings and anxieties, and the “inflection point is ominously consistent”. Give or take a year or two, it’s 2010 – the year that smartphones “went from luxury to ubiquity”. Coincidence? Not when you look at the growing body of survey evidence showing that the more time teens spend on social media, the…

An explosion in microplastics The amount of microplastics in the world’s oceans has risen dramatically over the past 18 years, a new analysis has found. Researchers in California examined 11,777 samples taken from the surface layer of the oceans (which extends to a depth of about 600 feet) between 1979 and 2019, and used this data to estimate the average amount of microplastics in that layer over time. They found that the levels fluctuated in the 1990s, probably as a result of some policies coming into force that limited the release of plastic into the sea; but in 2005, concentrations started to rise sharply and consistently – increasing tenfold over the next 15 years, despite drives to recycle more plastic in many countries. By 2019, there were an estimated 170…

If Gary Lineker finds his ego becoming unmanageable in the wake of his row with the BBC, he could always pop home to Leicester to be put in his place, suggests Patrick Kidd in The Times. A few years ago, Lineker was filming a crisps advert in the city where he started his career. Word had got around, and a crowd had gathered. Lineker himself was loitering off camera when an elderly woman approached. “It’s Gary Lineker isn’t it?” she asked him. He preened, before she continued: “What’s going on here? Are they expecting someone important?” King Charles is said to be refusing to pay for his brother’s Indian healer. Sources told The Sun that Prince Andrew has for years regularly employed the healer to help him with chanting, holistic…

“If you are a train enthusiast hoping to ride HS2 from Manchester to London, take good care of your health,” said The Times. You might just “make your first journey by the late 2040s. But don’t bet on it.” Last week, Transport Secretary Mark Harper announced that the second stage of HS2, from Birmingham to Crewe, will be delayed by two years at least, and may not be open until 2036. The stage beyond that, to Manchester, may not be open until the 2040s. Trains will also now not run all the way into central London until around 2040, as the Government still needs to make sure it has “an affordable and deliverable station design” at Euston: they’ll stop instead at Old Oak Common in west London. Harper blamed the…

England went into their Six Nations clash against France last Saturday sensing that a brighter future lay “over the horizon”, said Robert Kitson in The Observer. Back-to-back victories over Italy and Wales seemed to suggest that under new coach Steve Borthwick, the side was moving in the right direction. But such optimism was swept away on a damp, windy evening at Twickenham, as England were handed their heaviest-ever defeat at home and France romped to a 53-10 victory. The contest was one-sided from the off, England’s limitations “cruelly exposed by opponents who possessed loads more power and panache”. France scored seven tries; England just one. “By the end, with the red rose defence being breached almost at will, the gulf between the teams was embarrassing.” Borthwick had made the bold…

Golf Scottie Scheffler claimed the world No. 1 ranking by winning the Players Championship in Sawgrass, Florida. The American hit five consecutive birdies in his final round. Cricket Virat Kohli struck his first Test century since November 2019 as India drew their fourth Test against Australia. India won the series 2-1. Football Liverpool followed their 7-0 victory over Manchester United with a 1-0 loss to Bournemouth. Chelsea beat Leicester 3-1. Tottenham beat Nottingham Forest 3-1.…

When the Shakespeare North Playhouse – a wooden replica of a 16th century theatre, housed in a gleamingly modern building – opened in the Lancashire town of Prescot last summer, The Observer’s architecture critic, Rowan Moore, described it as “a hybrid of the authentic and the improvised… of the scholarly and the popular, and of ancient and modern”. And he could equally have been describing this “thoroughly engaging” new production, said Clare Brennan in the same paper – a slickly contemporary spin on The Comedy of Errors, written by Elizabeth Godber and Nick Lane. In the programme, they say that their ambition, in “messing about” with Shakespeare, was to give audiences a “fun night” – and this “more than fulfils” it. The pair have deposited Shakespeare’s comedy of identical twins…

A rare painting by the 17th century Dutch master Pieter Brueghel the Younger – one of his largest known works – has been found hanging behind a door in a house in northern France, says Kim Willsher in The Guardian. “It had been in the same family since 1900, but its provenance before then remains a mystery.” The picture is a version of L’avocat de village (The Village Lawyer, detail above), a theme Brueghel reproduced up to 90 times, which is thought to have been painted between 1615 and 1617. The family had no idea it was such a valuable work, explained Malo de Lussac of the auctioneers Daguerre Val de Loire: “In the family it was known as ‘the Brueghel’, but they had no idea it was a real…

Ben decides to stay put at Brookfield, so Josh looks for a new housemate for The Stables. Adam’s upset when he finds Brian sorting through Jennifer’s things. Ian suggests they take her stuff back home, to give everyone a chance to go through it. Lily complains to Ben about living with Freddie. When Ben suggests Freddie could move to The Stables, Lily decides to move in herself. Freddie tries out his new Lower Loxley tour on Noluthando. Noluthando loves the tour, but suspects one of the paintings may depict a slave ship. Kate’s surprised when Brian turns up at Spiritual Home. After a massage, Brian feels better and declares Spiritual Home Kate’s calling. While sorting through Jennifer’s things, Adam finds a letter to her from his biological father, Paddy Redmond.…

The idea of throwing chopped rhubarb into cake batter, raw, like little sticks of Brighton rock, came to me via my friend Sarah Standing, says Skye McAlpine. And it is sheer genius. When rhubarb isn’t in season, you could use raspberries (frozen or fresh), blackberries or even blueberries. Rhubarb and almond cake Serves 10 370g salted butter, softened, plus more for the tin 370g caster sugar 370g ground almonds 2 tsp vanilla extract 5 eggs 3 tbsp milk 190g polenta 1½ tsp baking powder 300g rhubarb, chopped into 2cm pieces sea salt flakes • Heat the oven to 190°C. Butter a 23cm springform cake tin and line it with baking parchment. • Beat the butter and sugar together until pale and light. Stir in the ground almonds and vanilla. Now…

● A shower will use less water than a bath, but only if it is a reasonably quick one. A bath typically uses 80 litres of water, a two-minute shower will use about 20 litres (more if it is powerful). ● To check if your shower is using an unnecessary amount of water, put a two-litre bowl on the shower floor. If it takes less than 12 seconds to fill, invest in a water-saving shower head (£20 from screwfix.com, or look at savewatersavemoney.co.uk to see if you can get a free one). These should not be used on electric showers. ● Your water company may also provide a Buffaloo bag for your cistern (99p from savewatersavemoney.co.uk), which will save a litre or two of water per flush. ● If you…

The week’s best shares Arecor Therapeutics The Mail on Sunday This early stage drugs firm, which majors on improving existing products, has attracted partnerships with global groups including Hikma. Expecting good news on diabetic treatments. Buy. 243p. Ashtead Group The Times The construction and industrial equipment rental giant is a “marker of the broader US economy”. Rising infrastructure spending stateside should provide a fillip as rental revenue growth guidance is upped again. Buy. £58.74. CRH Investors’ Chronicle The world’s largest building materials supplier is moving its listing to New York, where it has been acquiring assets. Profits have jumped 8% and the buyback programme has been cranked up. Demand holding up well. Buy. £43.46. Greggs Investors’ Chronicle Inflation pressures have weighed down the food-to-go retailer’s growth. But sales are up…

THE WEEK CROSSWORD 1354 An Ettinger pass holder and two Connell Guides will be given to the sender of the first correct solution to the crossword and the clue of the week opened on Monday 27 March. Send it to The Week Crossword 1354, 121-141 Westbourne Terrace, London W2 6JR, or email the completed grid/listed solutions to crossword@theweek.co.uk. Tim Moorey (timmoorey.com) This week’s winner will receive an Ettinger (ettinger.co.uk) travel pass holder in assorted colours, which retails at £115, and two Connell Guides (connellguides.com). Four answers need an appropriate extra letter to form the entry ACROSS 6 Queen’s consort associated with a part of N America (7) 7 Sounds like UK city is ahead (5) 9 Go round singular French city (4) 10 The carol’s pitched about right relative to…

Everything Everywhere All at Once, a low-budget sci-fi film about an immigrant family in the US, which dominated the Oscars, winning seven awards including best picture, best director and best actress for Michelle Yeoh. Born in Malaysia, Yeoh, 60, is the first Asian winner of that award. Prince Edward, who became the Duke of Edinburgh. It was Prince Philip’s wish that his youngest son, the Earl of Wessex, should inherit the title; and King Charles conferred it on him last week, as he celebrated his 59th birthday. Edward’s 15-year-old son, James, Viscount Severn, will become the new Earl of Wessex. But his daughter, 19, will remain Lady Louise Windsor. London, which was named the most scenic city in the world in the spring. A travel firm trawled Instagram to see…

Hospitals in England cancelled tens of thousands of appointments and operations this week, as junior doctors staged their biggest walkout in the health service’s history. As many as 61,000 junior doctors (those below consultant level) stopped working for 72 hours from 7am on Monday, in pursuit of a 35% pay rise, which the BMA claims would return their real-terms pay to pre-austerity levels. NHS leaders said it could take months for services to recover from the disruption, and that rescheduling cancer treatments would prove particularly hard. In Northern Ireland, ambulance staff were due to strike on Thursday. Across England hundreds of schools closed as teachers walked out for two days, in demand of better pay. Strikes also disrupted the London Tube system and parts of the national rail network.…

Steve Baker’s happiness Earlier this year, the Tory MP Steve Baker noticed a strange feeling. “I think it might be happiness,” he told his wife. It was a joyful moment, but tinged with sadness, because he realised that it was the first time that he’d felt happy since the Brexit referendum. In the years after the vote, Baker was never far from the heart of the political drama: he played a key role in the downfalls of Theresa May and Boris Johnson, and was a passionate lockdown sceptic. Finally, in November 2021, the “extreme stress” he’d been under came to a head at a prayer group he attends at Portcullis House. “I suddenly just started crying,” he told Matt Chorley on Times Radio. “And I realised I couldn’t control it.”…

A new combat sport called “slap fighting” is gaining traction in the US. Athletes compete by standing at arm’s length from each other and taking turns to slap each other in the face. The idea is to land a hard enough blow to prevent their opponent from slapping back. Late last year, the Nevada Athletic Commission recognised the sport for the first time, sanctioning the Las Vegas-based Power Slap League. Fans of the sport say it is similar to boxing; detractors say it is “just brain damage”. A logistics company in China asked job applicants to wear white plastic costume masks for interviews last month, apparently to ensure they were not discriminated against. Chengdu Ant Logistics explained that the masks reduced candidates’ stress levels, and underlined that abilities matter more…

UNITED NATIONS A drop of hope gleaming on the sea Neue Zürcher Zeitung (Zurich) Perhaps there’s hope for the planet yet, says Esther Widmann. For almost 20 years, countries around the world have been struggling to reach an agreement on protecting the high seas. And now they have “finally” agreed on rules to protect marine life in international waters – the two-thirds of the ocean surface that lies more than 230 miles from the nearest coast. This has long been a “law-free zone”, where industrial fishing fleets tear up the sea bed and destroy marine life, a trend exacerbated by the more recent drive to extract minerals – notably manganese, which is used in the production of steel and batteries. According to Unesco, half of all marine species could be…

Graphic lessons on oral sex. Instructions about how to choke your partner safely. Discussions of the 72 possible genders. This, according to the Tory MP Miriam Cates, is what passes for RSE (relationships and sex education) in British schools today. Cates made these “eye-popping claims” in the Commons last week, said Paul Waugh in The i Paper. The former biology teacher and committed Christian has helped to compile a report on what she describes as “age-inappropriate, extreme, sexualising and inaccurate” material in RSE lessons, which has now been published by the campaign group she co-founded, the New Social Covenant Unit. Cates described the issue as a nationwide “safeguarding scandal”. Tory MPs cried “hear, hear”, and the PM promised a review. “It would be truly shocking if children were encouraged in…

It’s not a given: their lead over Manchester City is just a slender five points, said Alyson Rudd in The Times. But, increasingly, Arsenal look like a team “comfortable with the mantle of champions-elect”. At Craven Cottage on Sunday, Mikel Arteta’s side sauntered to a 3-0 victory over Fulham. The three goals, all coming in the first half, were scored by different players, but each was set up by Leandro Trossard – making the Belgian the “first player in Premier League history to assist three goals before half-time in an away match”. With only the Europa League to distract them (they’re no longer in the FA Cup), the Gunners will give undivided attention in coming weeks to their mission: winning the league. Now they have Gabriel Jesus back, they’re even…

NHS is failing patients… To The Guardian Your article about the failure of most NHS trusts to meet cancer waiting targets was horribly familiar (“Only 2.4% of English NHS trusts hit cancer wait target”). My husband, who has previously had cancer, was referred “urgently” by his GP to University Hospitals Birmingham almost seven weeks ago. He got an initial scan after three weeks that showed concerning findings, and another “urgent” referral was made to a specialist. The best that UHB have come up with so far is to tell my husband he might get a phone appointment in four weeks. He needs a physical examination. In despair, we have turned to the private sector, where he has been seen by two specialists and is due to have a diagnostic biopsy…

by William Middleton Ebury 480pp £25 The Week Bookshop £19.99 Karl Lagerfeld well understood, many decades before Instagram, the “importance of having a personal brand”, said Hadley Freeman in The Sunday Times. Almost everyone knows the Lagerfeld look: “tight ponytail, dark glasses, severe tailoring”, as William Middleton characterises it in his “expansive” and well-researched biography. Born in Hamburg in 1933 (though he’d later claim it was 1938), “Kaiser Karl” was the son of a merchant who made a fortune by importing condensed milk into Germany, said Hilary Rose in The Times. Both his parents were Nazi party members. Fascinated with fashion from a young age, Lagerfeld moved to Paris aged 19, and by his mid-20s was a “couturier and man about town”. In the 1960s and 1970s he “honed his…

Who Cooked Adam Smith’s Dinner? A Story About Women and Economics by Katrine Marcal, 2012 (Granta £8.99). In this highly readable book, Marcal explodes the foundational myths of the free market, exposing capitalist pieties, immaturities and self-deceptions, and refocusing our attention on the deep interconnectedness of labour and love. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley, 1818 (Penguin £7.99). It’s hard to believe that Shelley was only 19 when she wrote this fearsome, deeply felt, up-to-the-minute contemporary, formally perfect novel. What would our culture look like without Frankenstein? I can’t even imagine it. She spawned whole genres and experiments. Minor Detail by Adania Shibli, 2017 (Fitzcarraldo £10.99). Dispossession, occupation, memory and control are all coolly interrogated in this spare and devastating novel about a woman who becomes obsessed with a “minor detail” of…

Programmes Grace John Simm reprises his role as Detective Roy Grace in Dead Like You, the first of three new episodes of the Brighton-based crime drama. Sun 19 Mar, ITV1 20:00 (120mins). The Gold: The Inside Story DCS Brian Boyce and other detectives tasked with cracking the Brink’s-Mat heist talk about the case for the first time since the 1980s. Mon 20 Mar, BBC1 21:00 (60mins). Imagine… Stephen Frears: Director for Hire Alan Yentob interviews the director behind dozens of acclaimed films, from My Beautiful Laundrette to Victoria & Abdul. With contributions from Glenn Close, John Malkovich and Hanif Kureishi. Mon 20 Mar, BBC1 22:40 (65mins). DNA Journey The fourth series of the celebrity genealogy show follows the Line of Duty co-stars and friends, Neil Morrissey and Adrian Dunbar, as…

Experts know, of course, which bottles will improve with age and which are unlikely to, says Susy Atkins in The Daily Telegraph. A rough guide, for those who do not, is to drink the following quickly: pale rosés; inexpensive whites such as pinot grigio and sauvignon blanc; the lightest reds and the cheaper fizz. These are unlikely to have the structure to “stand any test of time”. For wines that will last, look out for: anything with a “very crisp acidity, or honeyed sweetness (or both)”, and anything “rich and full of tannins”. Rieslings, with their natural high acidity, generally have “great longevity”; ditto chenin blanc, and many of the “top sparklers made in the champagne method”. Most “big, burly reds” will merit some keeping – all the more so…

Bay Mackerel (England): drowning in good olive oil, this tastes like fresh mackerel – it is incredibly meaty, delicate, firm and not too fishy (£5.95 for 120g; therockfish.co.uk). Catrineta Sardines in Escabeche (Spain): pleasantly vinegary, paprika-laden mini sardines (£2.85 for 81g; brindisa.com). Marinated Mussels, Pepus (Spain): these plump, juicy mussels are marinated in a piquant oily, vinegary escabeche (£4.25 for 115g; thespanishshop.net). Yurrita Anchovies (Spain): intensely fishy, salty and oily, these Cantabrian anchovies are cured for 20 months (£4.80 for 50g; thetinnedfishmarket.com). Sea Sisters Salt Pollock (England): a homegrown version of bacalhau – chunky, salty pollock doused in garlicky bay-infused oil (was £12, now £10 for 125g; thecornishfishmonger.co.uk). Ortiz Atun Claro Fillet (Spain): sweet and tender, this tuna melts in the mouth and is not too fishy (£10 for 250g;…

A Dutch island in the Caribbean The Caribbean island of Aruba has long been popular with Dutch and American visitors, and now it looks set to see more British travellers too, with the launch of new British Airways flights from Gatwick – the first direct year-round service from the UK, says Claire Dodd in The Times. A largely autonomous part of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, like its neighbours Bonaire and Curaçao, it is located just 18 miles off the coast of Venezuela, but its climate is unusually arid for the region. Don’t let that put you off, however. The island has “all the powder-soft white-sand beaches (about 40, in fact), glittering translucent seas and swaying palms you could want”. And its culture is interesting, too, with a unique, Portuguese-based…

Chaim Topol 1935-2023 Topol, who has died aged 87, was loved by generations of film- and theatregoers for his portrayal of Tevye, the “soulful shtetl milkman” in the musical Fiddler on the Roof, said The New York Times. The part had been created on Broadway by Zero Mostel; but when the film version came to be made in 1971, its director, Norman Jewison, insisted that the role – “one of the most coveted” in Hollywood – should go instead to Topol, an Israeli actor who was scarcely known in the US. The film won him an Oscar nomination, and made him a star. In the decades that followed, he would reprise the role on stage countless times, becoming, in the words of The Jerusalem Post, “Israel’s most famous export since…

The Middle East pivots to Asia Una Galani Reuters Breakingviews “For a sign of the new business times”, look no further than China’s success in brokering the restoration of diplomatic ties between Saudi Arabia and Iran, says Una Galani. It’s “a huge political win for Beijing”, but for bankers and investors, it’s a sign that “their next big opportunity stems from a deeper Asia-Middle East embrace”. The Middle East has “trained its financial sights” on Asia before, with mixed results. But greater cooperation is an idea whose time has come for “Gulf petrodollar economies that have traditionally looked West for a place to sell their oil and gas, and to park their money”. Now, with the world apparently splitting into two blocs, oil demand in the Americas and Europe is…

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