Table of contents for August 29, 2016 in Globe

FREEZE PLAY! DIANE KEATON needs to Annie Haul her fashions to the dump! She may think it’s hot to be dressed for winter in August, but we say it’s totally uncool! OH, LOU! Either TV’S Lou Grant is winking at the camera, or 86-year-old ED ASNER got into a bar brawl before a charity event in Las Vegas! SHORT CHANGED! Rapper 50 CENT gets down low and dirty with Mini-Me legend VERNE TROYER, who’s a quarter of his size! WHATTA HEEL HIV poster boy CHARLIE SHEEN was recently seen in Malibu researching a new career option: gumshoe! SHOWING HER BEST ASSET! BRADLEY COOPER’s model girlfriend IRINA SHAYK cracks up in an itsy, bitsy bikini! THE FARCE AWAKENS! Whoa! Looks like the Dark Side got to CARRIE FISHER. Help her, Obi-Wan…

GLOBE WORLD EXCLUSIVE! A SHOCKING new autopsy on the body of TV’s “Crocodile Hunter,” Steve Irwin, will reveal the beloved wildlife daredevil was STONED on a powerful hallucinogenic drug when he was fatally stabbed by the foot-long barb of a massive stingray — and DIDN’T HAVE TO DIE! That’s the explosive claim by a source close to the Animal Planet hero, who charges the truth about the star’s Sept. 4, 2006 death at age 44 while filming a documentary was COVERED UP a decade ago. Now, on the eve of the 10th anniversary of his passing, Steve’s body has been exhumed for a new autopsy after investigators demanded the case be reopened! Experts are determined to find out if his horrible death on a reef off Queensland, Australia, was just…

COWARDLY white supremacist Dylann Roof — who shot and killed nine worshippers in a black South Carolina church — finally received some payback when another inmate beat him to a pulp in the shower. Dwayne Stafford, who confessed to the attack, says Roof, 22, “whined” like actress Janet Leigh’s character when she was taken down in the shower during the Hitchcock thriller “Psycho.” The attack was carefully calculated, says Stafford, 26, who pretended to befriend the gunman who hoped to trigger a race war with his June 2015 massacre at Charleston’s historic Emanuel AME Church. Stafford was trying to shut up the beast who boasted he’d killed a 5-year-old girl during the bloodbath. Actually, the child survived by fooling Roof into believing she was dead. Just before the beating, Stafford…

MORE PUZZLES! MORE CASH! WIN $250! PLAY SPOT THE DIFFERENCES! $250 to the first correct entry out of the bag! $25 goes to the first five runners-up! HOW TO ENTER Spot 10 differences between our cartoons. Slight color differences DON’T COUNT. ENTRIES MUST BE RECEIVED BY Sept. 12, 2016 Spot the Differences #35 P.O. Box 7019, New York, NY 10008 Please print clearly. Name _______________________________________________________ Address _____________________________________________________ City_________________________________________________________ State/Zip ___________________________________________________ Daytime phone number_______________________________________ SEND QUIZ ENTRY ONLY. DO NOT INCLUDE MAIL TO OTHER DEPARTMENTS. Please print clearly. Winners will be notified by mail or phone. Allow 6-8 weeks to receive winnings. GLOBE assumes no responsibility for late, misdirected or lost mail. All entries become the property of GLOBE. This contest is void where prohibited by law. All federal, state and…

This Australian actress has some serious skills. She’s tamed a wolf, married the Lord of the Jungle and captured the heart of a Joker. Still stumped? Check page 56 for the answer WIN $75 TIC TAC TRUE PLUS! FIRST 3 RUNNERS-UP GET $25 EACH WHAT’S YOUR SIGN? 1. A water carrier is the symbol for Aquarius. 2. Robins are a sign of spring. 3. The yield sign is a diamond shape. 4. George Washington signed the Declaration of Independence. 5. A prophetic sign is called an omen. 6. “Signs” is a movie starring Mel Gibson. 7. Dark clouds and thunder are a sign of rain. 8. The symbol for Aries is the bull. 9. An octagon is the shape of a stop sign. DIRECTIONS: For every true answer, place an…

ACROSS 1 Strawberry ___ dessert 6 Work force 11 Like Cirque du Soleil shows 16 Small bay 17 Prairie wolves 18 Casts a ballot 19 Like ice sheets 20 “Land of the Free” 21 ___ cents worth 22 Caesar’s 201 23 Swiftest cat 24 Gorilla 26 Seoul locale 29 Suffix for verb 31 Batter’s goal 32 Sandwiched in 34 Clinks glasses (2 words) 36 Prefix for violet 39 Lupino of films 40 Buyer’s bid 42 ___ to riches 45 Tantalize 46 Intended 47 Right away! 49 Chef Lagasse 51 Bankrolled 53 Young colt 54 Cleveland team 57 Windowshopped 59 First-aid plant 60 Apollo’s mother 61 Televise 62 Goad 64 London tennis major 67 Famous 70 Lock horns 73 Oklahoma oil city 74 Lawn moisture 76 Dog breeders’ org. 77 A…

SEX-SWAPPING Olympic star Bruce Jenner’s shocking change into a woman named Caitlyn may have screwed up his children! That’s the conclusion of a top shrink after her supermodel daughter Kendall bared her bizarre home life. Kendall, 20, confessed her dad’s drag-queen antics — which began BEFORE the sex change — were a “gnarly experience” that left her “confused.” Top New York psychotherapist Dr. Gilda Carle, who has not treated the Jenner clan, tells GLOBE while Kendall seems “very healthy” now, “we never know how things affect us down the road. “It’s possible for this to leave long-term emotional scars. Only as Kendall begins to take a mate will she start to question how honest and how sincere he is and how he’s going to maintain his gender identity.” In a…

HEARTBROKEN Princess Diana finally exploded over her husband’s blatant cheating — and forced a furious face-to-face showdown with Prince Charles’ blond mistress, Camilla Parker Bowles, at a private birthday bash! Now as Diana’s bodyguard, police Inspector Ken Wharfe, reveals shocking details of the February 1989 confrontation, palace insiders say humiliated Charles NEVER forgave his wife — and it became his motive for murder! “Diana’s clash with Camilla infuriated Charles,” says a royal insider. “It pricked his ego that she’d have the nerve to interfere in his ‘private life’ — and Camilla nagged him constantly about how Diana showed them both up. “There’s no doubt that after the incident he desperately wanted to be rid of his meddling wife!” Certainly, Charles tried to keep Diana away from the 40th birthday bash…

BETHENNY POURS A NASTY DRINK Skinnygirl mogul BETHENNY FRANKEL is really a mean girl! Spies report the “Real Housewives of New York City” star threw a glass of booze at a crowd of women blocking her view at an intimate Coldplay concert for VIPs in the ritzy Hamptons. Witnesses say she was really nasty and ordered a drink just to toss it at the ladies! She now insists she was just trying to “cool them off.” Sounds like she’s the one who needs to cool it! HUGH GRANT AIN’T NO STREISAND! Hunky HUGH GRANT claims he’s such a perfectionist he’s “driven people mad on films that I’ve made.” The “Florence Foster Jenkins” Brit, famous for his tryst with a street hooker, says, “I want more takes. I want to try…

FUHGEDDABOUDIT! The Mafia sleeps with the fishes! G-men believe they’ve finally smashed the mob — for good — after rounding up 46 wiseguys in a massive bust of Mafia strongholds spanning the East Coast from Boston to Florida. Many of the collared crooks have colorful names like “Tony the Cripple,” “Big Vinny,” “Tugboat,” “Muscles,” “Harpo,” “Rooster” and “ Mustache Pat.” But there’s nothing funny about the charges they face, including extortion, gun-running, arson, illegal gambling, loan-sharking, credit card fraud and — the old Mafia standby — leg-breaking. With the help of local cops, the FBI smashed a massive crime organization branded the “East Coast La Cosa Nostra Enterprise,” comprised of powerful crime families in at least four states. The goons, who range in age from 24 to 80 years old,…

2/10 IGGY AZALEA Hey Iggy, I’m not sure what constitutes clothing in the Land Down Under but this certainly doesn’t cut it here! 4/10 MARGOT ROBBIE Calling all zookeepers! Will somebody please lock Margot’s dress up and never let it leave its cage again? 8/10 HEIDI KLUM Fashion forward! Heidi looked fabulous in a floral printed dress and a tiny black leather jacket! 3/10 TRACEE ELLIS ROSS If your ‘girlfriends’ ever tell you to wear a banana suit out in public, they aren’t your friends. 2/10 SARAH JESSICA PARKER Sarah would be much better off ‘letting gobetter go’ of Disney princess Elsa’s dress from “Frozen.” 1/10 KELLY OSBOURNE I can’t help but feel sorry for Kelly’s dog. No one should ever have to be associated with an outfit this bad.…

GLOBE’S NO-NONSENSE OPINION PAGE GLOBE columnist Jeff Rodack tells it like it is about celebrities — how they get under his skin with their stupid antics and the nonsense they try to put over on the public. Here is his unique take on Hollywood newsmakers and fakers. HMMM … now we’re subjected to Orlando Bloom in, uh, full bloom! Orlando made the stupid decision to ditch his bathing suit as he vacationed on the beach in Italy with girlfriend Katy Perry. Looking at the cheeky photos, Bloom gave a whole new meaning to the word DUMBASS! But his backside wasn’t the only part of his anatomy left uncovered, if you know what I mean. You might say the “Pirates of the Caribbean” star looked like he was dropping anchor as…

DON’T MISS... “The Strain” (Season Premiere(Premiere) Sun., Aug. 28, FX, 10 p.m. As the vampires evolve, Eph (Corey Stoll) realizes his bioweapon is failing. He struggles to improve it while working through the abduction of his son, Zach. “Star Plates” (Series Premiere) Mon., Aug. 29, Cooking, 10 p.m. Funnygirl Mindy Kaling kicks off this series about celebrities stepping in as line cooks for the leading chefs at their favorite restaurants. “Greenleaf” (Season Finale) Wed., Aug. 31, OWN, 10 p.m. The first season of the scandalous soap featuring the faithful and the failing of a Southern megachurch comes to a jaw-dropping close! “Saturday Night College Football” Sat., Sept. 3, ABC, 8 p.m. Number 15-ranked USC goes up against No. 1, Alabama’s Crimson Tide, at AT&T Stadium in Arlington, Texas. THE sexual…

NOBODY’S gonna howl if the judge puts dog torturer William Leonard Dodson into a cage for five years! That’s the sentence the 42-year-old dumbass faces for earning the title of “meanest man in America” by cruelly taping shut the muzzle of his pup Caitlyn because she was barking too much — and then laughing about it. The South Carolina brute must have known his vicious torture of the then 15-monthold chocolate Staffordshire mix would enrage jurors if he decided to go to trial in a Charleston court. So the vicious swine pleaded guilty to animal cruelty figuring he could get the minimum sentence of 180 days. But Charleston Animal Society CEO Joe Elmore says he and the country’s animal lovers are pushing for the fiveyear max term. Shortly after buying…

A BOMBSHELL new book rips the lid off the secret world of Hollywood’s most influential power players — exposing vicious temper tantrums, fistfights, seduction and cunning schemes to cash in on celebrities’ shocking weaknesses! In his explosive tell-all, “Powerhouse,” author James Andrew Miller exposes the twisted inside story of Creative Artists Agency (CAA), which represented A-listers including Tom Cruise, Meryl Streep, Madonna, Brad Pitt, Steven Spielberg, Paul Newman, Robert Redford, Dustin Hoffman, Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Prince and Sylvester Stallone. Ruthless superagent Michael Ovitz, who co-founded CAA with Ron Meyer, ran his superstar clients like puppets on a string — and was a raging, nasty egomaniac who’d eagerly make a deal with the devil to stay in control, the book charges. When faced with losing cash cows like Cruise…

KILL-CRAZY Dr. Louis Chen butchered his gay lover Eric Cooper and slashed the throat of their adorable son — to avoid a dirty custody battle! Sadly, the 20 cuts on little Cooper Chen’s neck weren’t deep — and the terrified tot died in agony, slowly bleeding out as he lay near Eric’s body, which was stabbed 177 times by the maniac medicine man. Cowardly Chen was tabbed the “cold syrup killer” when he tried to beat the rap by claiming the spoonfuls of prescription medicine he’d gulped to treat a cough triggered his mental issues and made him legally insane – unable to tell the difference between right and wrong. But after prosecutors revealed endocrinologist Chen, 44, went nuts because 29-year-old Eric planned to dump him — and get custody…

THOMAS Gibson flew into a violent rage and attacked a staffer on the “Criminal Minds” set — and friends are urging him to get help before he gets canned! “He’s like a ticking time bomb,” says a source. “He’s put his career and family at risk, again. He needs rehab to help stop his self-destructive behavior!” CBS bigwigs suspended the 54-yearold actor for at least two episodes after he went ballistic and viciously kicked a writer-producer. Gibson, who plays a tough FBI agent on the show, blames the incident on “creative differences” and a “disagreement,” saying, “I regret that it occurred. We all want to work together as a team to make the best show possible.” But that’s not the only time the former “Dharma and Greg” star has exploded…

GLOBE EXCLUSIVE DESPERATE to win the White House, Hillary Clinton is keeping a shocking medical condition from voters — she’s secretly battling deadly multiple sclerosis, sources reveal. In a bombshell exclusive, GLOBE has learned the 68-year-old former first lady is in the early stages of the incurable nerve-savaging disease, which saps victims’ energy, wrecks their balance, triggers falls and often causes vision problems. Photos showing the Democratic presidential candidate wearing glasses with a prism — a feature designed to fix double vision, a symptom of the disease. After suffering a series of falls and repeatedly being photographed struggling to stand and walk, “she could have early stages of MS,” exposes Dr. Leslie R. Mathews, Director of Surgical Critical Care at Atlanta’s Morehouse School of Medicine. Hillary is terrified her medical…

Medical news YOU can use! A NEW drug just approved for use is set to provide relief for dry eye, the painful, visiondamaging disease that afflicts millions! Xiidra, the first prescription eye drop to treat the signs and symptoms of dry eye, has been approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration to fight the effects of tear deficiency. “Normal tear production is needed for clear vision and eye health,” explains Dr. Edward Cox, director of the FDA’s Office of Antimicrobial Products. “This approval will provide a new treatment option for patients with dry eye disease.” The risk of having dry eye — which affects 16 million people — increases with age. It impacts 5 percent of the adult population from ages 30 to 40 and 10 to 15 percent…

WIN $100 Tell us why these pix DON’T exactly match and win... There are three differences between these photos. If you spot them correctly — and your entry is the first chosen at random — GLOBE will send you $100. Simply identify the three differences between the photographs in a letter or postcard and send it to us at the address listed in the official rules on page 47. DID YOU GUESS? The actress on page 47 is Margot Robbie, star of “The Wolf of Wall Street” and “The Legend of Tarzan,” as well as the Joker’s girlfriend Harley Quinn in “Suicide Squad.” How did you do? GLOBE WINNERS BARBARA JOHNSON, of Waleska, Ga., is our Spot the Differences winner for week 30! The retired receptionist is also a married…