Innehållsförteckning för November 2015 från FHM UK

It’s easy to remember the iconic moments in life. Things like your dad teaching you how to ride a bike, or the first film that made you utter the words, “It’s OK, I’ve just got something in my eye.” (Cheers for that, Marley & Me.) But an iconic person: that’s a different matter. An icon is someone so famous that they’re instantly recognisable by their first name alone. A name like… Pammy. During the 1990s, Pamela Anderson was the most famous woman on the planet – an angel in a red swimsuit on Baywatch. Now she’s back – and even sexier than before. Don’t believe us? Check out our exclusive interview on p60. We also pay a visit to the NBA Draft, a less teary X Factor for basketball that…

Got something insightful to say about the mag? Then tell us about it! To celebrate the release of Good People starring James Franco and Kate Hudson on DVD and Blu-ray, we’re giving away a 32in TV and a copy of the movie. The thriller follows a debt-stricken couple in peril after stealing money from their dead tenant’s apartment. Send us a letter (with a picture if poss) via one of the ways on the opposite page for your chance to win.…

01 New show Go on a quest for revenge with Ron Perlman He burnt up your screen as a bike gang kingpin on Sons Of Anarchy and as the demonic avenger Hellboy, in, er, Hellboy . Now, Ron Perlman is playing the lead in Amazon Prime’s brutal new revenge show Hand Of God – and we caught up with him to get the lowdown… Hand Of God is about a judge looking for vengeance – have you ever wanted to get some revenge yourself? Life is a series of negotiations with myself about not taking matters into my own hands. There are so many motherfuckers here in Hollywood. You just want to kick ass and level the playing field – you want to stop these people putting other…

“Phil mitchell. I’d definitely like him under my cane – I bet he’s got a nice fleshy bottom.” “The sultry toned legend that is Tom Jones. He’s the biggest silver fox there is.” “It might sound a bit weird, but it’s got to be brian, the talking dog from Family Guy .” “The most charming man on Earth, Stephen Fry. I met him once and he left me speechless.” Wonder Woman, because why the hell not? Who would say no to a superhero?” “Chris Tarrant. He could teach me things as we have sex. The more I learned, the more I’d orgasm.” “rachel riley. She looks adorable in all her dresses on Countdown .” “Lee evans. He’s a sweaty guy, so I’d probably get wet just hanging out with him.”…

Sisters (1973) What the devil hath joined let no man cut asunder “It stars Margot Kidder and William Finley as the greatest ever mad scientist.” The Innocents (1961) A haunting tale of terror! “It’s a really old school black-and-white horror with some brilliant child actors. So creepy.” The Changeling (1980) How did you die, Joseph? Why do you remain? “It’s just such a great little horror film, and George C Scott is fantastic in it.”…

01 Have you ever had a spectacularly good session of DIY? I grew up building a lot of things, but my greatest ambition was to create a hoverboard. I got as far as finding some wood, then the plans kind of fell apart. Bloke 02 What’s your favourite smell? Nando’s, but that’s a sore issue. They offered me a black card, but I missed the deadline to go and pick it up. That still hurts me to this day. Absolutely tragic stuff. Not bloke 03 What’s the biggest thing you’ve ever set on fire? My brothers and I threw a big box of fireworks into a bonfire. It went mental, so we legged it – but I was the slowest, and they left me behind to face the chaos. It…

MAKE AN OLD SUIT LOOK BESPOKE Take in tips from Hayley Harmer of A Suit That Fits (asuitthatfits.com) 01 A handmade buttonhole is an instantly recognisable feature that a jacket is bespoke. This can easily be done by a tailor, but the buttonhole should be open and usable, not still stitched up. 02 Alterations will depend on whether the suit’s too big or too small, but always try to get the jacket to fit on the shoulders and taper in at the waist for that perfect V-shape. 03 Changing the very last buttonhole on the cuff to a contrast colour is another way of making a subtle change that can give the appearance of going bespoke. STYLE-HACK YOUR FORMAL WEAR Look your best and get the most out of your…

Adding the extra 10% is a thing we like to do, and we strongly recommend you do it too. Whether it’s a slick watch, a silk pocket square or a James Dean-worthy pair of Wayfarers, the right accessory can turn a basic outfit into a well-thought-out stylish look. Swot up on all things small with this new book, which will also look pretty dope on your coffee table. The Details: Iconic Men’s Accessories, £19.95, amazon.co.uk…

RAW G-Star didn’t use it in its name for nothing. This dark, unwashed denim is stiff and durable but fades in certain areas with each wear to give it that naturally distressed look. Perfect for firefighters and bike riders alike. SELVEDGE A personal fave of the FHM style team, this has tight weaving with natural edges that don’t unravel. Your average piece of denimwear weighs 12oz, but you can get selvedge up to 18oz. STRETCH The clue is in the name. This kind of denim is mixed with two or three different fabrics including Spandex, meaning it’s flexible so you can practise the splits in your jeans – whoopee! COTTON SERGE The most traditional denim is made from 100 per cent cotton, making your jeans super-duper smooth to touch.…

THE POMADE Pierce Brosnan has a head of luscious hair slicked to perfection. Invest in some turbo-charged pomade to keep this hairstyle in place. £49, Oribe at uk.spacenk.com THE FRAGRANCE Spritz away at your neck with this fancy bottle diffuser fragrance, ready for the next Bond girl to sniff. £142, uk.acquadiparma.com THE MOISTURISER Keeping your mug silky smooth is key to fighting wrinkles. Why do you think Timothy Dalton looked so good in Licence To Kill? This one has a built-in SPF. £28, kiehls.co.uk THE RAZOR Get rid of the bum-fluff, just like that scene in Skyfall. Use this razor for a clean shave that won’t leave you looking like a 15-year-old who’s sliced his face off with his old man’s Bic. £9.99, bluebeards-revenge.co.uk bluebeardsrevenge.co.uk…

Eat ham and drink lager in Chueca While English drinkers are being escorted from the bar by 8.30pm on a Friday, Madrid’s revellers rarely leave the house before 10pm. The place to go is Chueca, a formerly shady area now populated with modern tapas bars, clubs and, er, the odd transvestite prostitute. Great, if that’s your thing. Getting there 01 The 14-hour Eurostar from London St Pancras starts at £101. loco2.com 02 Flights start at £29.49 from London Gatwick. easyjet.com 03 Alternatively, fly from Manchester from £55. iberia.com Sip a cold one on a market roof While British markets are characterised by their rails of counterfeit football tops, things are a little classier in the Spanish capital. The Mercado San Antonio is crammed with cooked meat stalls, with a rooftop…

WE HAD A SHINDIG Bottle poppin’ is our favourite hobby here at FHM, so a huge, booze-addled thanks to Patron and Peroni for providing us with the drinky-poos (and to Ben Pearce, who gave us the tunes) at our star-studded FHM Collections party at the Hoxton Hotel, London. WE PLAYED WITH FIRE Deputy art director Jamie organised a massive fireworks blow-out for our Tested feature (p128). Let this be a warning: writing a magazine with missing fingers is very tricky. WE MET A MAYOR Tourism Ireland took Web Editor Elizabeth to Kilkenny where she ended up meeting the mayor and waving about his metal sticks. This one now has pride of place by the FHM vending machine. WE FOUND A DRAGON This month we knocked on the door of former…

WHO SHE? Age: 33 From: Bradford, West Yorkshire Likes: Rugby league, tennis, fashion Twitter: @AndersonNatalie Instagram: @natjanderson Chips ’n’ gravy. The songwriting of Noel Gallagher. Alan Shearer’s ‘mesmerising’ displays on Match Of The Day . Face it, the list of great things that the north of England is responsible for producing just goes on and on. What’s more, if you’ve seen Emmerdale at all in the past few years – and who hasn’t? – you’ll know that Natalie Anderson, who played Alicia Metcalfe on the show for five years, is a firm presence on this list, too. But now Bradford-born Nat has left the soap, she’s readying the next stage of a career that’s taken in everything from recording an album in Denmark to singing Kate Bush songs on ITV’s…

According to newspapers and highly exasperated Clarks’ shop assistants, British children are now learning to tie their shoelaces later than ever before. You can’t really blame them. The day a boy learns to tie his laces is the day that life suddenly becomes that little bit more complicated. It’s the earliest dawn of adulthood – where endless curbside kickabouts make way for gruelling commutes and looming deadlines. Laces are the chains that bind us to a life more ordinary. On the playground, Velcro rules with an iron grip and a satisfying rip. Yet in the adult world, most men wouldn’t be caught dead donning a pair of sticky kicks. But why does it have to be this way? With the rerelease of Adidas’s staple Stan Smiths (a late ’90s classic),…

If you’re anything like us, your protein intake is sporadic at best. Just popped out 30 press-ups? Best have a shake. Hit 30 tricep dips while waiting for lunch? Protein for afters, then. Ran home in record time? Pass the protein. But what if we’ve been doing it all wrong? Is there a better way? Luckily, former marine and head of strength and conditioning at Gloucester Rugby Paddy Anson is on hand with a breakdown of a pro-rugby player’s training and protein routine – working with their nutrition partner USN – to inspire your workouts. Get stuck in. 7AM “Injured players do a rehab swim, then take a USN R3-Excell protein shake to aid recovery.” 8AM “The other players come in and run through their training markers, focusing on grid…

BESPOKE YOUR SMARTPHONE Tap into the latest apps with recommendations courtesy of TechRadar’s Gareth Beavis 01 MOMONDO A cheap flights app with a tracker that shows you the cheapest time to fly. momondo.co.uk 02 BBC iPLAYER The downloads give you a decent range of content to save to your phone or tablet. bbc.co.uk/iplayer 03 FLIO This app automatically logs you into most airport and train WiFi networks. getflio.com 04 CITYMAPPER A must for anyone new to a city, this award-winning app shows you the secret ways to get around, with walking, driving and transit directions all in there. citymapper.com 05 POCKET Save articles for offline reading with this app, and read at your leisure. getpocket.com 06 GOOGLE MAPS Google Maps’ new traffic integration means you get real-time traffic updates, with…

REDISTRIBUTION OF WEALTH VS FREE-MARKET MERITOCRACY NBA: All teams contribute around 50% of their revenue, which is redistributed among smaller teams to keep them financially stable. EPL: A small circle of the richest teams gobble up the largest slices of TV and sponsorship revenue, oblivious to those underneath. NO RELEGATION VS RELEGATION DOGFIGHTS NBA: At the end of a season, the only punishment for coming last is shame. The lowest ranking teams bolster their roster by getting first picks of the best college players. EPL: Failing to get results can plunge bottom teams into a relegation dogfight, desperate to reap the many lucrative financial incentives of staying in the EPL. SALARY CAPS VS NINE-FIGURE FEES NBA: Players can be traded in exchange for other players, draft picks or a limited…

Take one legendary sporting brand and mix it with a cool fashion label, and you’ll end up with a collaboration that’s a force to be reckoned with. Maison Kitsuné’s innovative print has been added to Reebok’s varsity pieces for a range that bats all other preppy collections out of the park. Who doesn’t want to wear clothing covered in foxes wearing caps? No one, that’s who. Jacket, £220; T-shirt, £50; shorts, £70; socks, £12; trainers, £85, all reebok.co.uk…

THE TEXTURED CAP The fresh update on your standard cap is softer this year. Stay stylish with wool, corduroy and felt. THE BOBBLE HAT These were made famous by Where’s Wally and are worn in force in winter months. Team with grown-up garms to avoid looking like an actual wally. THE CLASSIC BEANIE Year after year, 95% of the country reach for their favourite beanie hat when the temperature drops.OK, maybe we’re exaggerating, but it’s time for a new one… THE ALTERNATIVES Peacocking will always be in fashion. If you’ve got the balls, team one of these bad boys with an understated outfit for serious street cred.…

With 20 years’ experience sorting barnets out across the country, Fish knows how to make the trendiest of guys look bloody badass. Whether it’s a hairspray that adds an effortless edge to your relaxed daytime look or a wet-look gel that’ll have you looking as sharp as they come, Fish has got you covered this season. And the hairstyle heavyweight doesn’t just throw around its products like an annoying know-it-all, oh no. There’s some proper oomph behind the brand, as the Fish Soho salon sits in the heart of London, testing and using the products, and sending customers away with a huge smile on their faces (and a brand new barnet on their heads). When a vocalist of an acclaimed rock group swears by the stuff, it’d be rude not…

01 Ever wondered what The Eagles would sound like if they dipped a toe in death metal? That’s what Jesse and EODM co-founder Josh Homme asked themselves in 1998. Presumably it wasn’t a sober conversation. 02 EODM were sacked from supporting Guns N’ Roses in 2006, with Axl Rose calling them “The Pigeons Of Shit Metal”. Hughes politely told Rose to “Go fuck himself”. 03 A life-long Christian, Hughes became an ordained non-denominational minister in 2012. So if you’re looking for a guy with a ginger ’tache to officiate at your wedding… 04 Halfway through speaking to FHM, Hughes trailed off into a heavy silence, returning a moment later to inform us he’d just been handed a “powerful form of marijuana”. Rock on.…

On 14 July 2014, Lee Talbot, a rail worker from Hyde, Greater Manchester, took his girlfriend to Amsterdam to celebrate their respective 37th and 40th birthdays. Like many visitors to Amsterdam, they sampled some of the capital city’s legal marijuana. It was such a relaxing break that upon their return, they immediately booked another holiday to the idyllic Tunisian island of Djerba. But what they didn’t know was that weed can stay in your system for up to six weeks. It was a miscalculation that would land Lee in Tunisia’s most notorious and remote desert prison, without trial, for the next eight months… WE’D HAD A GREAT TIME IN AMSTERDAM. We never used drugs at home, but we thought it’d be a missed opportunity if we didn’t sample some of…

I’ll never forget that first punch to the nose. I was 11, sparring against an older, bigger kid who wasn’t holding anything back. He jabbed me straight on the nostrils, and you know what? I loved it. Boxing was my destiny. My dad, a fighter himself, had been dragging me along to his gym from the age of seven. Turns out I was a natural. When I won my first junior trophy, I sat and stared at it for hours. Regardless of how much I’ve achieved, it still looks like the title belt to me. They call me Million Dollar Crolla. Mostly because it rhymes, but also because of the Clint Eastwood film. Nothing to do with money, unfortunately. Never give yourself an inch. I train ridiculously hard so I…

No wonder A Nightmare On Elm Street’s Freddy Kreuger had a temper: he was always one of life’s runners-up. For one thing, the melty-faced serial killer only had the second-best fedora hat in cinema, after Indiana Jones. Dennis the Menace had a better stripy jumper. And he only had the third-best disfigured face, after Hellraiser’s Pinhead and Sloth from The Goonies . He didn’t even have the best slasher claw; glueing kitchen knives to a gardening glove is never going to match Wolverine, whose claws are made out of the strongest substance in the universe (and we’ve only left out Edward Scissorhands because he didn’t slash anyone). But, in spite of all those obvious insecurities, there is one thing Freddy Krueger can never be touched on by anyone: the fear…

or most of us, turning left when you get on an aeroplane – ie into upper class – is something that happens to other people. But why should celebs get all the perks? The good news is that with a little bit of cunning and the odd white lie, you too can live the life of a go-getting business tycoon, getting the best seats on planes and quaffing overpriced wine in smart cocktail bars. And often for a fraction of what it’s costing Mr Red Braces. Want to know more? Just step this way, sir… Your free glass of Champagne is waiting for you at your seat. BE KING OF THE DEPARTURE LOUNGE Falling asleep across three seats in the terminal is for chumps. Go for broke with these wins…

IMPRESS YOUR DATE BY GETTING THE BEST TABLE IN THE RESTAURANT “It helps if you know where the best table is,” says Dudley Spencer of members’ club Lights of Soho. “If you ask for a nice table, you might get one but it won’t be the best in house. Visit the venue first with a view to making a booking or, if you’re pushed for time, study the images on the venue’s website. Being able to ask politely for the ‘quiet table away from the bar’ makes it look like you’re a regular. And people always respond to specifics.” GET ON THE LIST OF A COOL CLUB “If you’re going somewhere that runs a guest list, call ahead or email and tell them you had an awesome time last time…

When someone turns 40, their usual thoughts are, “What the hell have I done with my life?”, “Is it OK to jack in my job and go travelling?” and “Where did that grey pube come from?” But Penfield is making turning 40 bloody brilliant. For its big anniversary, it’s revamped some of its most recognisable styles for a limited-edition collection that features original drawings printed on the lining, leather cord locks and letterbox-red zippers. Jacket, £160; gilet, £135, both penfield.com…

STAY IN THE SHADE From off-white to acid-wash grey and khaki green, all shades of denim are doable. Just match them up right – don’t go all baby Bieber on us and wear white denim head-to-toe. Always contrast. PINCH YOUR PENNIES It’s not always true that the more you spend on your clobber, the better the fit. Brands such as Bethnals (London homegrown and affordable), Wåven (looks expensive, costs virtually nothing) and even New Look are investing in their menswear denim section. DEFINITELY DOUBLE UP We can guarantee you’ve thought about throwing on that denim shirt with your staple jeans. Do it! Just make sure the shades are different. We suggest black jeans, blue top. BRANCH OUT Denim doesn’t just mean jeans, oh no. Your favourite fabric works on coats,…

TENZING NORGAY Alongside fellow climber Sir Edmund Hillary, ‘Sherpa’ Tenzing was the first to conquer Mount Everest. His laidback shirts and fedoras were the, er, ‘peak’ of relaxed style. DOUG SCOTT Known for his ‘visionary’ attitude to mountaineering, Doug is regarded as one of the leading high-altitude climbers. Think Keith Richards, with added rope and ice picks. BEAR GRYLLS We know, we know… his name always pops up when it comes to anything explorer-related. But we’ve got to hand it to him – the man has got style.…

01 Go old-school on your VIDEO GAMES Once upon a time you’d save up £30, buy the brand new FIFA and that was you sorted for the next five months. Now you need a bank balance the size of a small country to get set up with the latest Call Of Duty. Relive simpler times by dedicating your evening to some of the best moments in video-gaming history Fight the T-Rex in Tomb Raider Not necessary to progress through the game, but still pant-worryingly ace. Collect every colour heart on Commodore 64 classic Flimbo’s Quest A near mythical achievement. Choose your first Pokémon on Pokémon Red And Blue All the emotions. Storm Omaha Beach on Medal Of Honor: Allied Assault Makes Saving Private Ryan look like a picnic. Learn the…

THE ROCKET WAR Every Easter, residents of the Greek island of Chios pile into the small town of Vrontados, where 50,000 rockets are fired at two rival churches 400m apart. As close to a war zone as you can get without joining up. THE GUINNESS WORLD RECORD How many fireworks do you need for a solid display? If you’re the small Norwegian town of Søgne and feel like celebrating 200 years of your country’s constitution, the answer is a casual 540,382, smashing Dubai’s previous world record of just 479,651. THE 30-SECOND EXTRAVAGANZA In 2010, Pyroworks International Inc fired off 125,801 fireworks in 30 seconds in Cebu in the Philippines. Then everyone sort of stood around for a bit before wandering home until next year. Enter the code FHM2015 at the…

10 Watching a storm Mother Nature knows how to put on a spectacle, so the least you can do is show her a bit of respect by watching awesome storms in all their glory. Plus, we’re never quite sure if the telly will blow up. 09 Having sex Avoid awkward questions like, “What’s wrong with your face?” and “Why are you putting that there?” by popping the light off during hanky-panky. 08 Being at a festival During the day you’re Dr Jekyll, waiting patiently for your £6 cider in a straw hat. But when the sun goes down, Mr Hyde comes out to play. Before you know it, you’re standing astride two dodgems and downing a yard of Jägermeister. 07 Anything illegal If the Home Alone films have taught us…