Table of contents for August 27, 2018 in Globe

BEYONCÉ’s tour is a gas — literally! Blabbermouths snitch the song-bird’s bulging tummy — which triggered pregnancy buzz — is actually the result of an overactive digestive tract that makes a big stink! “Beyoncé’s tour has been hit by waves of flatulence,” spills an insider. “No one wants to point fingers, but it often comes from Beyoncé’s general vicinity. It’s been causing all sorts of problems, especially with people on her tour,” who are joking she’s totally toxic! Queen Bey’s belly bloat also plays havoc with her clingy costumes, which become too tight for her to zip up. The Flawless diva gets moody as hell — and folks run for cover! “You can’t blame her. It’s got to be uncomfortable and embarrassing,” notes the source. Staffers have been trying to…

MEDDLING Barbra Streisand has already turned into the grandmother from hell, even though stepson Josh Brolin’s baby daughter isn’t due until November. The 76-year-old diva — married to Josh’s actor dad, James, 78, since 1998 — “has totally hijacked this pregnancy with her pushiness and constant interference,” snitches an insider. Brash Babs insists on talking to Josh’s wife Kathryn’s “tummy just about every day, and is also planning the delivery and ordering sheets and drapes for the hospital room,” the source blabs. “She’s picking out music to play on speakers when the baby girl arrives, and she’s already got a caterer working on a meal delivery plan so Kathryn doesn’t have to eat hospital food. “Josh and Kathryn told her that’s not necessary but she wouldn’t hear of it.” Barbra’s…

CHICAGO P. D.’s Marina Squerciati says a dead Wall Street mogul is her dad — and she wants a cut of his $100 million fortune! The 37-year-old actress insists the late John R. Jakobson secretly splashed out for her pricey private education, forked over thousands for her care as a kid and promised he’d leave her a “substantial” payout in his will. But now Marina’s in court because she says he stiffed her — though Jakob son’s estate denies her paternity claim.…

Loud music makes you eat unhealthy ✚ DINERS opt for greasy meals over healthy salads when restaurants play loud background music, says a team of American and Swedish researchers. Between lab tests and eatery observations, the scientists discovered when tunes were played at higher volume, patrons’ orders for unhealthy foods spiked ten percent over times the noise level was lower. Experts conclude weight-conscious “consumers might opt to shop and dine in retail settings that have lower volumes of ambient music.” Bikes don’t damage men’s private parts ✚ RIDING a bike doesn’t wreck men’s sexual or prostate health, according to a new study refuting earlier findings. Researchers at the University of California, San Francisco analyzed data from nearly 3,000 male pedal-pushers — and did not detect evidence of impotence or prostate…

AFTER fleeing the clutches of a twisted cult accused of branding women and turning them into mindless sex slaves, the daughter of Dynasty actress Catherine Oxenberg is finally home following seven years of abuse and torment! Catherine says she devoted the last year to saving her oldest child, India — and taking down the sketchy self-help group NXIVM — since learning her daughter had joined its sick sorority and was groomed to sexually service its kingpin, Keith Raniere! The prime-time soap opera star claims India, 27, was starved so severely her hair fell out, was brainwashed into giving up her cash and freedom, and had the initials of the group’s leader seared into her flesh! Now, more than three months since Raniere and his sidekick, Smallville actress Allison Mack, have…

JOHN LENNON’S killer, Mark David Chapman, told his wife he planned to assassinate the Beatle two months before he pumped four slugs into the Imagine singer’s back — but she never ran to the cops. If Gloria Chapman had squealed, the music legend might still be alive — and Chapman may have spent the last 37 years as a free man. Instead, the psycho is making his tenth attempt to win parole this week — and devoutly religious Gloria, now 67, is revealing the shocking reasons she protected the boozing wife beater. She insists Chapman, now 63, first told her he planned to murder Lennon and “make a name for himself” in October 1980 — two months before he did the dirty deed on a New York City sidewalk. Gloria,…

Bon Jovi rocker RICHIE SAMBORA, 59, and live-in lover ORIANTHI PANAGARIS, 33, have split after four years. Five-foot Nashville cutie HAYDEN PANETTIERE has kayoed her romance with baby daddy WLADIMIR KLITSCHKO, the ex boxing champ, and is seeing BRIAN HICKERSON. BRISTOL PALIN, daughter of ex-GOP darling SARAH, and hubby DAKOTA MEYER divorced after less than two years. They share daughters SAILOR, 2, and ATLEE, 1. 24 star ERIC BALFOUR and wife ERIN welcomed a baby boy to join big sister COCONUT. The new kid’s name is still top-secret. My 600-lb Life star JAMES “L.B.” BONNER was found dead at age 30 of a gunshot wound in his South Caroline home. No foul play was involved, say cops. Galaxy Guardian CHRIS PRATT’s fling with KATHERINE SCHWARZENEGGER is rocketing. She took him…

AFTER Tara Reid’s success in 1999’s American Pie, a string of botched plastic surgeries — and a party-girl reputation — seemed to derail her promising career. But in 2013, a starring role in the outrageous made-for-TV disaster movie Sharknado turned her fortunes around. The 42-year-old admits she’s gotten a “second chance” — thanks to the Syfy film, which has spawned five sequels, including this month’s The Last Sharknado: It’s About Time. Here are ten things you don’t know about the scary-skinny star. 1 She began acting at age six and appeared in more than 100 commercials as a kid, including ones for Crayola, Milton Bradley and Jell-O. 2 She was once engaged to MTV’s Carson Daly, but they called it quits in 2001. 3 After American Pie, she appeared in…

TWO cult members killed their group’s bizarre “chief apostle,” then hacked him to pieces with an electric saw and scattered his body parts, charge cops, who insist a severed leg helped them unravel the 14-year-old cold case! Now Rudy Hannon, 72, and Sorek Minery, 42, members of the Connecticut-based religion known as The Work, are accused of butchering 70-year-old Paul Sweetman in 2004 as he fought for control of the secretive sect. Both men worked together to kill Sweetman — but each has pointed the finger at the other, according to police in New Britain, Conn. Minery claims Hannon convinced him Sweetman “needed to be killed because he was hurting his wife, Joanne, and God would have wanted them to kill him,” according to police. Minery also told investigators he…

FACED with having her animal lover image shredded to coleslaw, TV chef Rachael Ray may be quitting the pet business after being caught up in a $5 million lawsuit charging her Nutrish dog food contains poison that triggers cancer in critters. “Rachael really cares about her image, especially when it comes to being a pet owner and an animal lover,” dishes a source. “She knows that something like this could destroy her. “It wouldn’t be a surprise if she decided to walk away from the pet business. She’d rather stop making the food than risk having her reputation ruined forever!” The scandalous lawsuit charges the claim Rachael’s pet food is made with only “natural” ingredients is bogus — and the stuff manufactured under her name by jam giant Smucker’s actually…

IF YOU think drinking diet sodas helps you lose weight — think again! New studies show sugar-free sodas actually INCREASE the risk for weight gain — and also for killer medical conditions like type 2 diabetes, stroke and dementia! According to a panel of doctors and researchers for the American Heart Association, many adults and kids turn to diet sodas as a way to wean themselves off sugary drinks. This may be OK as a short-term option, but the panel advises kicking sodas period. The good news is from 2000 to 2014 the average amount of sugary drinks downed by adults fell by half — from 16.2 ounces daily to 8.4. For kids the drop was even better, from 19 ounces to 8.6. The bad news is the rate of…

BITTER Tom Selleck is shunning CBS’ attempts to bring him onboard the new Magnum P.I. reboot. The new show stars 40-year-old Jay Hernandez as the ex-Navy SEAL turned Hawaiian private eye, and Selleck, 73, who originated the role, was offered a producer slot and a cameo role. But sources say Tom felt Magnum “peaked” with him in the 1980s and “wasn’t interested in doing a cameo. “He felt his fans would not accept him playing a different role while someone else starred as Thomas Magnum.” The reboot debuts Sept. 24 with another huge change. The character of Jonathan Higgins, played by the late John Hillerman, will now be a gal, played by Perdita Weeks. Sources say Selleck believes his Magnum worked because of cast chemistry.—George Bernard Shaw…

FRAIL and hunched over in pain, Meat Loaf uses a cane and wheelchair to get around — and now fans fear the crippled rock legend is “dying in agony” after a secret stroke! At a London celebrity convention last month — where Meat Loaf charged $150 for an autograph and a photo — the Bat Out of Hell singer arrived in a motorized cart and used a walking stick to hobble around the event. Bent like an old man, the 70-year-old star told fans “he was trying to put a brave face on his pain,” says a source. “He has lost loads of weight and looks like a shadow of his former self. He admitted he was slowly dying in agony.” An eyewitness noted the right side of Meat Loaf’s…

A “SERIAL farter” is spreading panic in New York’s trendy Greenwich Village — loudly blasting unsuspecting victims as he casually strolls by! Folks targeted in the attacks believe the culprit isn’t actually breaking wind — they suspect his backpack hides a speaker that booms out an ear-busting recording of “animal flatulence.” COPS say a flood of foul pig guts closed a section of Interstate 77 in South Carolina for six hours after a slaughterhouse driver tried to take a curve too fast and the disgusting slop spilled over the sides of his truck! Yuck! LOVESICK Travis Drexler made a corny proposal — creating a crop maze on his family’s Springside Farm in Fabius, N.Y., that spelled out “Allie will you marry me?” After seeing the message via drone, Allie Randall…

GAUNT George Clooney has wasted away to a scary-skinny 123 pounds, leaving close friends and loved ones terrified he’s battling a killer disease. The five-foot-eleven movie heartthrob — once an athletic 172 pounds — has melted into a scarecrow. Insiders worry his frail condition contributed to his harrowing July 10 Sardinian motorcycle accident that left him bruised and battered. Just weeks later, frail-looking George, 57, took wife Amal, 40, to dinner near their Lake Como, Italy, estate. She held his arm — apparently to steady him. Sources say Amal fears the Ocean’s Eleven hunk may have an undiagnosed medical condition behind his shocking weight loss that could kill him before their one-year-old twins, Ella and Alexander, are grown. “Amal has been a nervous wreck,” tattles an insider. “George is virtually…

GOOD-TIME CHARLIE IS CRYING POOR After years of blowing a fortune on booze, drugs and porn stars, disgraced TV superstar CHARLIE SHEEN is whining to a judge he can’t afford to support his four kids. The HIV-positive sex fiend, who reportedly caught the disease from bedding a transsexual, currently pays $20,000 a month to DENISE RICHARDS for daughters SAM, 14, and LOLA, 13, and $55Gs monthly to BROOKE MUELLER for nine-year-old twins BOB and MAX. He also owes a bundle to lawyers and the taxman. Once the boob tube’s highest paid star, raking in $1.8 million per episode on Two and a Half Men, good-time Charlie moans he can’t “find work” because he’s been “blacklisted” by Hollywood and is even selling his $10 million home to raise cash. GEORGE MICHAEL…

POP star Katy Perry’s backstage spreads must include tropical fruit, fresh-cut veggies and the fermented beverage kombucha, according to a recently revealed concert contract. The attention-hungry American Idol judge, who’s wrapping up a global tour, says she also requires apple cider vinegar because “it’s a great body balancer.” But that’s not all — the 33-year-old Bon Appetit singer calls on her crew and insists on “a prayer circle with my band and dancers before hitting the stage.”…

A COURTROOM crybaby wouldn’t shut his trap, so a judge shut it for him — with duct tape! Ohio Judge John Russo hit on the off-the-wall gag order when a man accused of robbery refused to keep quiet! Russo was trying to conduct business in a Cuyahoga County courtroom when Franklyn Williams, 32, kept speaking over him and ignored repeated warnings to stop yapping. In a video shot in the courtroom, Williams whines he’d just met his attorney and his property was removed from his cell. On the tape Russo replies, “Mr. Williams, I’m the judge in the matter. Shut your mouth and I will tell you when you can talk. You got it?” Later Russo tells Williams to “zip it” — and Williams protests, “But you’re not letting me…

AN EXCITING new drug promises to combat pancreatic cancer — a disease so lethal a diagnosis is essentially a death sentence. Only 20 percent of those stricken with the killer survive the first year and just seven percent are still kicking at the five-year mark. Even wealthy celebrities who could afford the best treatments — including Ghost heartthrob Patrick Swayze, Little House legend Michael Landon and Apple mogul Steve Jobs — couldn’t beat the rampaging killer. Dirty Dancing hunk Swayze, 57, and a well-conditioned athlete, survived just 20 months after his pancreatic cancer was discovered. Now researchers at the University of London’s Barts Cancer Institute believe a powerful experimental drug will lick the fierce illness. Lab rats given the medication were cured and a copycat type of treatment was effective…

ARIES March 21 - April 20 Stern steps are required to reclaim peace and quiet at home, Ram. Whether it’s grounding the teen who plays music at 3 a.m. or kicking out a deadbeat relative, Mars provides the courage for action! Recent cash flow worries ease with news of a pay raise or monthly payment erased by a generous benefactor! GEMINI May 22 - June 21 Be kind to the cranky neighbor everyone ignores, Twin. There’s a wonderful person hiding under that prickly exterior! The midweek Aries moon provides a boost of energy that gets you moving on a late-summer project. Success is starred! A luxury item catches your eye, but don’t blow the budget! LEO July 23 - Aug. 23 Dig deep Monday to understand a recent reluctance to…

DIONNE WARWICK is blasting claims her sister, Dee Dee Warwick, molested Whitney Houston as a child. The 77-year-old singer condemned the allegations — made in the documentary Whitney — as “evil” and completely false. “It’s totally hogwash!” the five-time Grammy winner fumes. “My sister would never, ever have done anything to do any harm to any child, especially within our family. And for those lies to be perpetuated in this so-called documentary film, I think it’s evil.” Whitney’s longtime assistant Mary Jones claims Whitney had confessed the abuse to her. Whitney’s brother Gary also claims in the film he was molested as a child by their cousin Dee Dee, who died in 2008. “I will never, and I mean this, ever forgive those who perpetuated this insanity,” says Dionne.—Oscar Wilde…

BOYISH good looks launched Tom Cruise’s career and insiders say the desperate 56-year-old plans to stay on top of the Hollywood heap — with the help of plastic surgery! Though the Mission: Impossible actor insists he’s never been nipped or tucked, a snitch claims, “He refuses to age gracefully — or naturally. “People are whispering he’s had a face-lift and maybe even a neck-lift. Everyone’s doing double takes because he looks like he hasn’t aged at all!” GLOBE has consulted a panel of medical experts — who have not treated the Top Gun star — to weigh in on his fresh face and how he’s maintained his movie-friendly mug! HAIRLINE “Tom looks like he had some work done on his hairline — it’s possible he’s had some hair transplants,” says…