Table of contents for June 12, 2023 in Globe

HOLLYWOOD — OR BUST Model IRINA SHAYK, Bradley Cooper’s baby mama, would be a boob to trust that itty-bitty bra top to keep her contained PERFECT STORM The rain can’t get a drop on CATE BLANCHETT as the Babel beauty shelters under an umbrella in France LUCKY STIFF Pampered punk rocker MACHINE GUN KELLY has a helper tame his mane and lock in his look with hairspray HIDE & EEK Reclusive JACK NICHOLSON had cleaned up his act — but The Shining screen psycho is back to looking like a horror show! NATURAL DISASTER James Bond’s JUDI DENCH admits to shunning plastic surgery — and one look at the wrinkled star confirms her story! MEAT & GREET Late-night legend JAY LENO tests the strength of his shirt buttons by downing a…

HUNKY football legend Tom Brady insists he’s not dating Kim Kardashian, but that hasn’t stopped her nosy money-hungry momager, Kris Jenner, from playing matchmaker, tipsters tattle. Sources snitch 67-year-old Kris is so desperate to trap the Super Bowl legend into her family, she’s even offering the retired 45-year-old NFL star her other single daughter, Khloé, if he prefers her. “Tom would be the ultimate catch for Kim or Khloé, who are desperate to land someone high profile and boost the family brand, too,” spills an insider. Sneaky Kim’s already hooked Tom’s attention by asking him to help her find a vacation home in the Bahamas. The 42-year-old recently checked out the exclusive Baker’s Bay Golf & Ocean Club, where Tom has a pad, but wasn’t there at the time. Meanwhile, Khloé,…

81-year-old siren sports new dazzler after setting pulses pounding again HOMEMAKING guru Martha Stewart comes off as a lovely, lovable granny cooking up yummy treats, but in her earlier years she was a wild hottie who hosted nude pool parties and tried to pimp out her hubby to a gal friend, insiders tattle. The 81-year-old billionaire, who recently raised pulses by posing as a swimsuit cover girl, seemed like a mismatched co-star for hip-hop legend Snoop Dogg in their Potluck Dinner Party cooking show, but in his book Just Desserts, author Jerry Oppenheimer rips the lid off Martha’s secret sexcapades — revealing she was probably wilder than the reefer-mad rapper. The daughter of a gym teacher turned salesman, 20-year-old Martha, a social-climbing model, married Yale Law student Andy Stewart, whose…

ROCKER’S FOOT FETISH RUBS OFF ON HIS SON FORGET about a soulful beat, it’s all about soles ’n’ feet for Blink-182 drummer TRAVIS BARKER — and his foulmouthed “influencer” son LANDON, 19, who’s apparently inherited his famous daddy’s freaky fascination with female footsies! What the yuck? While Travis, 47, gets a rush gushing about his 44-year-old blushing bride KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN’s sexy size-five stompers, the brunette reality babe doesn’t blink an eye over hubby’s cringeworthy kink. Now Landon, whose mom is former Playboy Barker model SHANNA MOAKLER, is demonstrating his own toe-loving in a video online, seeming to serenade the perfectly pedicured tootsies of his gorgeous celeb girlfriend of a year, Dancing with the Stars–winning twinkletoes CHARLI D’AMELIO, 19. “Like father, like son,” fans are foot-noting on TikTok, while other heels snark:…

Textiles These words are listed in alphabetical order according to length. Fit them into their proper places in the Framework. This puzzle has been started for you with the entry SLIP. Now look for an 8-letter entry starting with S. Continue working this way until the puzzle is completed. 4 Letters Line Robe Slip ✓ 5 Letters Dress Lapel Rayon Shirt Shoes 6 Letters Duster Hankie Linsey Merino Shorts Tartan 7 Letters Chemise Elastic Necktie Ratteen Sweater 8 Letters Camisole Lingerie Sneakers Terylene 9 Letters Astrakhan Track suit SOLUTION FOR WEEK #23 For more great puzzles visit www.PennyDellPuzzles.com…

ACTOR Ethan Suplee went from a 550-pound mound of flab to a strapping Tarzan-like hunk — losing 294 pounds! The 6-foot-1 star of TV’s My Name Is Earl and flicks Remember the Titans, Blow and last year’s Dog unveiled his muscular bod on social media, saying,“Once upon a time, the whole world was an impossibility.” Suplee, 46, began his transformation after Earl ended in 2009, saying: “I started obsessively riding bicycles. I was riding a bicycle six to eight hours a day, six days.”…

SOAP beauty Haley Pullos was busted for DUI after she narrowly avoided killing herself — and other people — when she blasted over a barrier on a Pasadena freeway and crashed head-on into an oncoming car at 60 mph! Cops say the 24-year-old starlet, who’s played Molly Lansing-Davis on General Hospital since 2009, had to be freed from her wreck and then smacked a helping firefighter, telling him: “This is a $400 f**king shirt!” Cops found mini-bottles of tequila and cannabis edibles in her car and say the actress was slurring her speech and her breath reeked of booze. She was arrested for DUI at the hospital and had to be sedated after fighting with staff. The other driver reportedly suffered major injuries. Cops say wild woman Haley, who checked into…

SELF-SERVING American Idol host Ryan Seacrest has ticked off the show’s staff and crew for refusing to stand up for judge Katy Perry, who’s being slammed as rude, cruel and obnoxious by furious fans howling for her head, insiders tattle! As the sassy I Kissed a Girl pop star’s Idol gig dangles by a thread, 48-year-old Seacrest’s lips have been sealed, fueling speculation he’ll be happy if Perry gets the heave-ho. “Ryan seems to be enjoying Katy’s discomfort,” snitches a source. “He seems happy fans are threatening to boycott the show over the way she can be so mean.” As GLOBE reported, 38-year-old Katy triggered a nationwide backlash in March, when she shamed contestant Sara Beth Liebe for alreadyhaving three children atage 23 — telling her she’d “spent too much time [laying]…

ALEC BALDWIN and KIM BASINGER met and fell in love on the troubled set of The Marrying Man, a 1991 romantic comedy about a playboy toothpaste heir and the nightclub singer he keeps marrying and divorcing. The besotted actors reportedly kept cast and crew cooling their heels while they canoodled in their trailer and tinkered with the dialogue written for them by comedy master Neil Simon. Baldwin has called the flop “the biggest mistake of my career” — and his turbulent marriage to Kim, which lasted from 1993 to 2002, didn’t fare much better!…

PANICKED British officials leaned on the FBI to destroy damning dossiers accusing Lord Louis Mountbatten — the murdered mentor of King Charles — of being a pedophile with a “perversion for young boys,” charges an esteemed historian! Dr. Andrew Lownie, author of The Mountbattens: Their Lives and Loves, confides he discovered the palace’s dirty secret in a hidden dossier compiled about the late earl. He claims a document bashed the former head of the Royal Navy, who was assassinated by an Irish Republican Army bomb in 1979, as a “homosexual” with a “lusting” for male minors! Lownie says after he requested additional records about the maternal uncle of the late Prince Philip, the American law enforcement officials confessed the papers were shredded “after you asked for them!” The researcher claims…

Dancing with the Stars pro WITNEY CARSON and her husband, CARSON McALLISTER, both 29, welcomed their second son, JET. The tiny dancer joins big bro KEVIN, 2. Days of Our Lives hunk BRANDON BARASH, 43, and bride of five months, ISABELLA DEVOTO, 23, are expecting their first baby together. The pair met when the nurse’s assistant was just 19. The soap star also has a daughter, HARPER, 9, from a previous marriage. Sly CHARLIZE THERON, 47, has reportedly been secretly dating hunky 6-foot-3 model ALEX DIMITRIJEVIC for the last few months. Congrats to AVA SAMBORA, 25, the brainy and beautiful daughter of HEATHER LOCKLEAR and her ex, rocker RICHIE SAMBORA. She graduated from the lofty University of Southern California with a master’s in marriage and family therapy. Her famous folks…

BRUISER Mike Tyson has been out of the ring for years, but this month the former heavyweight champ is punching above his weight with a role in the French action comedy Medellín. However, the longtime boxer is no stranger to Hollywood, with more than 60 acting credits — including notable cameos in The Hangover and Scary Movie franchises. He has three more flicks in the pipeline. Here are ten things you don’t know about Iron Mike. 1 By age 13, he’d racked up 38 arrests for petty crimes. 2 He loves reading about ancient history, especially Greece’s Hellenistic epoch. 3 After serving less than half of a six-year sentence for rape in Indiana, he left prison in 1995 with jailhouse tats of tennis ace Arthur Ashe, Marxist revolutionary Che Guevara and…

SCREEN legend Judy Garland must be clicking her heels with joy after a Minnesota man was indicted for swiping the ruby red slippers she wore while skipping along the Yellow Brick Road in The Wizard of Oz. Federal prosecutors in North Dakota say Terry Martin is charged with one count of theft of a major artwork and will appear in court this month. Insured for $1 million, the ruby slippers are actually estimated to be worth a whopping $3.5 million! They were stolen in 2005 while on loan to the Judy Garland Museum, located in the star’s hometown of Grand Rapids, Minn. A thief or thieves broke into the building and shattered a glass case holding the movie prop. The shoes — one of four pairs Garland wore shooting the 1939…

HOW TO PLAY Look up, down, diagonally, backward, forward, sideways — in all directions — to find the names or words in the list below. As you locate a word in the diagram, circle the letters and cross it off the list. After circling all the words, read all the unused letters to find the answer. The solution will appear in next week’s issue. SPUDS _________ AU GRATIN BAKED BINS BOIL CANNED CASSEROLE CHEESE CHIPS CREAMED CRISP DEEP FRY DICED DUCHESS DUMPLING EDIBLE EYES FARM FRITTERS GARNISH GRATED IDAHO INSTANT LORETTE LYONNAISE MAINE NEST PARSLEY PEEL POTATO SACK SCALLOPED STAPLE STUFFED WHIPPED…

GRIEVING Priscilla Presley, who lost daughter Lisa Marie in January at the age of 54, has made a grisly request — she wants to be buried next to ex-husband Elvis, even though he is currently spending his eternal slumber wedged between the graves of his parents! Priscilla, 78, petitioned for the prime resting place Lisa Marie Presley on the grounds of Graceland in Memphis, Tenn., while settling a nasty legal dispute with granddaughter Riley Keough, 34, over Lisa Marie’s millions. “It is my family’s and my wish for me to be laid to rest with my daughter and the love of my life when that time comes,” announced Priscilla. The battle over the estate was finally settled, but sources say Priscilla’s bid for burial next to The King was deep-sixed.…

GLOBE’S NO-NONSENSE OPINION PAGE PRINCE HARRY and limelight-loving wife Meghan hit a new low in yet another desperate ploy to paint themselves as victims by proclaiming photojournalists put their lives at risk by chasing them through the Big Apple after a glittering soiree. But there’s a big problem with the has-been royals’ tall tale — it simply wasn’t true! And that’s the official finding of the New York Police Department, which doesn’t have a dog in the fight. But to hear the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s rep tell it, the couple was a heartbeat away from having the same fate as Harry’s mom, Princess Diana, who died in a 1997 car wreck in a Paris tunnel with her lover Dodi Fayed. The comparison was deliberate — and a disgustingly…

DECAF coffee — made by soaking beans in water and other agents — actually contains caffeine! Only 97 percent of the stuff is removed from jitter juice during the process. TALK about the Frog Prince! Before he was crowned king, the late Queen Elizabeth’s environmentalist son, Charles, was honored by scientists in 2012 when they named a rare hopper after him — Hyloscirtus princecharlesi. NEW York City was once the oyster capital of the world, but the waters surrounding the island became so polluted the local mollusks were declared too contaminated to eat in 1927. It will take another 100 years before they are safe to eat again. HOLD my beer and watch this! Minnesota inventor Ky Michaelson has invented a motorcycle powered by a 14-gallon keg of brew as…

BOSSY Michelle Obama has grabbed the reins of her marriage to henpecked hubby Barack — but spies say friends are urging the former prez to stop being a spineless wimp! Sources snitch to GLOBE the 59-year-old former first lady has finally won the poisonous power struggle that was ripping their marriage apart. “She’s got Barack totally where she wants him, in the palm of her hand,” spills an insider. “He used to contradict her and argue over stuff like whether to live in L.A. or the East Coast, who he was hanging out with and who he was flirting with. “Now he’s tired to the bone and wary of crossing her because of her moods. He has totally resigned himself to her dominant personality and yesses her to death!” As…

YELLOWSTONE cowboy Kevin Costner is worth an estimated $250 million, but he’s been pinching pennies fearing he’ll have to give estranged wife Christine Baumgartner a huge chunk of his fortune when their divorce becomes official, tattle sources. Although Christine inked a prenup before their 2004 wedding, “Costner’s still worried sick about their pending divorce settlement and is watching his bank balance like a miser,” spills an insider. “He knows he’ll have to pay Christine a bundle. There’s spousal support and child support to consider.” Under the prenup Christine will be forced out of the three homes Costner, 68, owns, according to an informant. But he’ll have to buy her a new pad near their main residence in Ventura, Calif., so their kids, Cayden, 16, Hayes, 14, and 12-year-old daughter, Grace,…

JIM BROWN is heralded as the National Football League’s greatest player ever and a leading civil rights activist — but he was hounded into his grave by a violent past that included multiple charges of physical abuse and sexual assault! The 87-year-old Cleveland Browns running back, who died May 18, quit football at age 29 in 1965 to appear in flicks like The Dirty Dozen, but built up a rap sheet rivaling his NFL rushing records. The year he retired, he was charged with sexually assaulting an 18-year-old girl who claimed she was carrying his baby — but a jury cleared him after a ten-day trial. He was charged in 1968 with assault with intent to commit murder, and in 1969 with assault and battery — but the gals refused…

2/10 TRISHA YEARWOOD The country heavyweight is wildly unattractive after stuffing herself into a snug leopard-print frock 9/10 NAOMI CAMPBELL The model is super in a floor-sweeping ’70s-style gown complemented by blingy bracelets 1/10 BRAUNWYN WINDHAM-BURKE The Bravo babe should stop horsing around — her space-age cowgirl getup is a bunch of bull! 4/10 HALLE BAILEY The Little Mermaid is on theme with a fishtail skirt but her bathing cap headpiece is all wet 8/10 CHARLIZE THERON The Fast X fashionista is stunning in a mesh-effect dress embroidered with faceted beads…

PRESIDENT Joe Biden is stricken with a frightening health crisis — a devastating nerve condition has crippled control of his feet, causing him to embarrassingly trip and stumble while the world watches! As Joe gears up for a reelection campaign at the age of 80, medical sources say the commander-in-chief is suffering a form of peripheral neuropathy, a deterioration of nerve endings in his feet that results in weakness and lack of coordination. “Neuropathy means you have excessive nerve damage that results in loss of muscle control and strength,” says Florida physician Dr. Gabe Mirkin, who hasn’t treated Joe. “It happens to everyone as they get older but in some cases an individual can suffer an accelerated loss of nerves that leaves them stumbling and weak. That appears to be…

WOMEN SEEKING MEN CT. 017-036 I am a female seeking a male from 50s - 70s. LTR. I am a SBF, give a lot of TLC, ND, NS, D/D free ISO God-fearing male. I am very romantic, full of love. Cook, clean, wash and take care of my home. MO. 017-039 My name is Sunshine and I am 78 years old. I am French and Indian. I prefer a friendship man who is a Christian. I love poems and not letters, but greeting cards. From friendship to a marriage license. IN. 017-040 Attractive, SWF, 60’s, NS, ND, relocatable, income, personality. Exchanging likes, ideas and hobbies for exciting, timeless love relationship/marriage. Photo, phone and address. USA 017-041 Christian lady, 71, N/D, N/S likes sports, picnics, camping, gardening, travel, and dogs. Marriage…

A GROUP of Texas nuns have accused Roman Catholic Bishop Michael Olson of being “pure evil” and terrorizing them by raiding their convent using vicious claims their crippled mother superior had forbidden sex with a priest! In a shocking $1 million lawsuit against the Fort Worth cleric, the Carmelite Nuns of Arlington claim Olson has inflicted psychological distress by overstepping his authority to discipline them. Olson’s mouthpiece claims Mother Superior Teresa Agnes Gerlach “violated her vow of chastity with a priest from outside the Diocese of Fort Worth.” But according to the lawsuit, Olson stormed the secluded 72-acre Monastery of the Most Holy Trinity in South Arling ton in April, interrogated Gerlach about the alleged affair, seized computers and a phone and barred saying Mass. The nuns’ lawyer Matthew Bobo…