Table of contents for June 2023 in FourFourTwo UK

1 “WILL THE REAL LIONEL MESSI PLEASE STAND UP?” When CONMEBOL decided to host a special ‘Night of the Stars’, the audience could have been forgiven for rubbing their eyes and fearing that they were seeing double. “Look, there’s Lionel Messi! But hang on, isn’t that other guy Lionel Messi, too?” No, it wasn’t the big reveal of the Argentine’s secret twin brother, sent out on to the pitch when Messi’s tired to stroll around disinterested and hope no one notices it’s not really him (although it would explain a lot about Bayern 8-2 Barcelona). Instead, this was the unveiling of a statue of ‘the Flea’ at the federation’s museum on the outskirts of Paraguayan capital Asuncion – the exhibition already had statues of Pele with the 1970 World Cup and…

01 What’s the name of the cuboid musical instrument invented by footballer turned property show presenter Dion Dublin? 02 Shakira’s song Waka Waka was the official tune for which year’s World Cup finals? 03 Other than Portugal’s ‘Big Three’, Benfica, Porto and Sporting, only two clubs have ever clinched the Primeira Liga title. Who are they? 04 Which legendary duo did Thierry Henry overtake to become the all-time leading goalscorer for Arsenal and the French national team? 05 Which German international hit two goals to help eliminate his country of birth from Euro 2008? 06 In which year was the Bosman ruling introduced, stating that players could move on for free when their contracts expired? 07 Who was appointed manager of Bayern Munich in 1987 and took charge of them…

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LUCAS SILVA The day after Ødegaard, Real Madrid signed a 21-year-old Cruzeiro midfielder to great intrigue, yet Silva made only eight first-team appearances. Unable to adapt to European football, either in Madrid or Marseille, he returned to Brazil and now plays for Gremio. THEO HERNANDEZ Two years later, in 2017, Real Madrid paid city foes Atletico €24m to release a Colchonero born and bred. Like Ødegaard, the left-back had a loan at Real Sociedad, before Paolo Maldini set up a meeting in Ibiza to tempt him to Milan. Madrid sold up at a small loss. VINICIUS JR Signed in 2017 to arrive a year later, Vini Jr broke numerous records in joining Madrid, most of them held by Neymar. The learning curve was steep but, helped by Ancelotti and Karim…

If you come by car, you may spot it from the motorway. Milan’s landscape is flat, its buildings low, so the enormous beams that criss-cross the stadium’s roof, 80 metres from the ground, are easy to see from afar. If you come by tram, you’ll catch a glimpse somewhere along the Via dei Rospigliosi. Between the heads of your fellow passengers, you’ll see the easternmost roof beam as the ground draws nearer. It may be the trusses of the middle section or the tapered end that juts out over the Curva Sud, a wine-red blade slicing into the sky. Your first sight of San Siro will be most dramatic, however, if you come on the metro. Arrive in daylight and you’ll be met with a tantalising semi-reveal as you ascend…

Nice got some great news in early April. Three months into his reign as the club’s manager, Didier Digard was selected as one of 10 people to embark upon French football’s highest coaching diploma, the BEPF. It will save Sir Jim Ratcliffe, Nice’s owner and Britain’s richest person, €25,000 per match. That’s the fee the club have had to shell out since early January, every time former Middlesbrough midfielder Digard has taken charge of Nice without the requisite coaching badges. Fellow Ligue 1 outfit Reims have had to cough up the same, after hiring part-British boss Will Still. For Ratcliffe, the fee had been worth it – the 36-year-old Digard led Nice to a 12-game unbeaten run in his first dozen league outings since being promoted from reserve team gaffer.…

Being told you’re not good enough to earn a professional contract is one of the most heartbreaking conversations any young footballer can have. But that doesn’t always have to be where the journey stops. Many young players find a route back into the game via assessment trials, also known as exit trials. “Assessment trials are for players who are coming to the end of their apprenticeships, who aren’t going to be kept on by their clubs for professional contracts,” explains Henry Westmacott, media officer at League Football Education (LFE), who will run three events across the UK throughout May. “We help those players to find new opportunities.” The trials bring together hundreds of players seeking a second chance. The only eligibility requirements are that they’ve spent the previous season on…

“THE CALIBRE OF PLAYERS THAT FOLLOWED BECKHAM AND MYSELF IN MLS IS SOMETHING I’M PROUD OF” Norwich 0-2 Wolves August 9, 1997 First Division “As a young kid who’d just turned 17, making my senior debut for Wolves changed my life. I’d been called up to the first team a month beforehand in pre-season – I’d never played for the reserves; I went straight from the youth team into the first team. My mum and dad were at Carrow Road and I scored twice. The first was a left-footed volley from 20 yards, which was brilliant, and my second was a cheeky goal, skipping past a defender and poking the ball through the goalkeeper’s legs. Scoring a brace on my debut for Coventry two years later, after becoming the most…

THE TRIGGER Often competing with each other for a spot in Graeme Souness’ Newcastle team, Bowyer and Dyer both start at home to Aston Villa in 2005. They trail 3-0 with eight minutes left – Steven Taylor has already been sent off after handling on the line, then clutching his abdomen as if he’d been shot. THE FEUD While the ball’s in play and Newcastle are on the attack, Bowyer accuses Dyer of not passing to him. “It’s because you’re s**t,” Dyer instantly fires back. Brave words, Kieron: it’s Lee Bowyer, he probably won’t take this well… THE REVENGE Bowyer doesn’t take it well, marching up to Dyer, grappling with him, then starting windmilling. “I was trying to let him punch himself out,” Dyer later said, employing surprisingly impressive Muhammad…

On the face of it, Chonburi seem an unremarkable club, spending most of their time bobbing about in mid-table in Thailand’s top flight. But for the past two seasons, they’ve reportedly had the world’s richest footballer on their books. While Lionel Messi’s net worth is about £500 million and Cristiano Ronaldo a paltry £400m, Chonburi midfielder Faiq Bolkiah has been described as being worth closer to £16bn. How? Well, he’s the nephew of the Sultan of Brunei, one of the globe’s wealthiest royals. Bolkiah was actually born in LA, before relocating to England – he was educated at Bradfield College in Berkshire, beginning his football career with the mighty Woolton Hill Argyle, then moving on to AFC Newbury as a junior. “He became a fantastic goalscorer with amazing pace,” said…

Arsene Wenger offered to take Martin Ødegaard out for dinner. His treat. Martin ordered the steak. This was December 2014, more than six years before Ødegaard moved to north London, when it would be Mikel Arteta tempting him to Arsenal in an entirely different era. Wenger was planting the seed of a tree whose shade he would never get to enjoy personally. On that night long ago, three people, the future unknown to them, sat around a candlelit table and discussed football, development and values: the Arsenal manager, a teenage Ødegaard and his father. Hans-Erik had been a reliable, uncapped midfielder in the 1990s for Stromsgodset in Norway, but now the biggest clubs in Europe were lining up to lay gifts of gravity and light at his family’s feet –…

MICHAEL AND BRIAN LAUDRUP DENMARK With due respect to the De Boers, Hazards and, er, Nevilles, there has never been a more talented pair of footballing brethren than the Laudrups. Michael is arguably the greatest Danish player of all time. The attacking midfielder picked up silverware at Ajax, Barcelona, Real Madrid and Juventus. He was an integral cog in Johan Cruyff’s Barcelona ‘Dream Team’, pocketing four La Ligas and the 1992 European Cup. He then crossed the divide to the Bernabeu but somehow remains a legend at both clubs. Best of all, he did it in style. It’s hard to recall a more elegant playmaker: fiercely intelligent, full of feints and blind passes, an assist machine. Italian defender Roberto Galia noted, “I’ve played against Maradona, Platini and Baggio, but the…

Wigan fans are used to winning things. Oh, just the 22 league titles, on top of countless cups, shields and medals: their lads have lifted more silver than a royal butler, or a very prolific burglar. Wigan rugby fans, that is. Wigan Athletic Football Club? Barely a shiny pot to pee in by comparison, except for a load of non-league stuff and two Football League Trophies prior to their top-flight debut back in 2005. So, the minted Manchester City were hardly trembling with fear as they lined up opposite the Latics for the FA Cup final on May 11, 2013. But what an occasion it was. Shocks, tears, rousing speeches, heartwarming manliness, some light backstabbing… and that was all before the game kicked off. For Wigan, just reaching the showpiece…

ITALY 1-0 AUSTRIA (1934) Eight years after its opening, San Siro hosted three games at the World Cup. Germany overcame Sweden 2-1 in the quarter-finals before a paltry 3,000-’strong’ crowd, then 35,000 watched Italy’s semi-final against Austria. Enrico Guaita scored to steer the hosts towards a controversial Mussolini-inspired World Cup triumph in Rome days later. CAMEROON 1-0 ARGENTINA (1990) Diego Maradona’s Argentina turned up as world champions for Italia 90’s curtain-raiser, only to lose 1-0 to nine-man Cameroon, whose second red card was courtesy of Benjamin Massing’s sensational act of war on Claudio Caniggia. San Siro’s other five games at this tournament all involved West Germany; only one involved Frank Rijkaard’s spit, though. INTER 0-6 MILAN (2001) The pair finished fifth and sixth in the 2000-01 Serie A – Inter…

Since the formation of the Football League in 1888, just 38 players have reached the remarkable milestone of plundering 40 English league goals in a single season. As FourFourTwo goes to press, Erling Haaland is bidding to become No.39, which would make him – incredibly – only the third person in the past 50 years to achieve the spectacular feat. What’s more, neither of those two most recent goal-getters did it at the top level. Haaland, just 22 and in his debut season in the league, would be only the second player since the Second World War to register 40-plus efforts in an English top-flight campaign. Even true greats such as Gary Lineker and Thierry Henry never managed more than 30, and the modern-day Premier League record is shared by…

JIMMY GLASS “Jimmy Glass, get up there! You might as well, for heaven’s sake.” Has radio commentary ever been so prophetic? Forget Alisson – Glass’ late strike for Carlisle against Plymouth on the final day of the 1998-99 Division Three season will forever be the narrative pinnacle of goalscoring goalkeepers. It saved one club and doomed another. With 10 seconds left, the score 1-1 and Nigel Pearson’s Cumbrians having to win to stay in the Football League, the on-loan glovesman came up for a corner. His opposite number parried and Glass pounced, walloping home from close range and wheeling away, arms aloft, like a seasoned finisher. Carlisle fans stormed the pitch and the referee was almost caught in a pile-on. “Everybody who loves football knows that goal,” reflected Glass later.…

THE HURRICANES An animated tour de force on either side of the Atlantic in the mid-90s, the Hurricanes starred on ITV featuring characters inspired by famous names, including Scottish boss ‘Jock Stone’. Owned by a 16-year-old girl, they’d go off on wacky global trips – opponents included the Cairo Pharaohs and the Inverfinnan Celtics, a weird combo of Celtic, Inverness and, er, Steve Finnan? COCO UNITED In a Coco Pops TV ad released during the 1994 World Cup, Coco United were 10-0 behind to Amazon Forest at half-time – not even 2005’s Rafael Benitez would have fancied his chances of a comeback. But spitting in the face of the superstition about not touching the cup before you’ve won it, Coco the Monkey filled the trophy with milk and Coco Pops…

2016–18 PER MERTESACKER The beloved ‘BFG’ inherited the captaincy from Arteta but only skippered Arsenal in a handful of matches. Poor Per was plagued by injuries and made his first appearance as captain in the 2017 FA Cup Final, of all games. They won, too. These days, he runs the club’s academy. 2018–19 LAURENT KOSCIELNY Next in line, literally, was Mertesacker’s fellow centre-back. The Frenchman was promised a move at the end of 2018-19 and, in that leaderly way, went on strike to secure it. In his unveiling at Bordeaux, he took off his Arsenal jersey to reveal his new club’s strip underneath, which slightly soured the 350-odd Gunners appearances across nine years of service. 2019: GRANIT XHAKA Already unpopular at the time, Xhaka tossed away the captaincy by swearing…

More than 27,000 people were on their feet in Mecca, shouting “Siuuu!” at the top of their voices, as Cristiano Ronaldo celebrated his fourth goal of the game in trademark fashion. Al-Nassr were 4-0 up at relegation battlers Al-Wehda, but the home side’s fans didn’t seem all that bothered that they were on the receiving end of a tonking. CR7 was the unquestionable star. In their previous home match at the King Abdulaziz Sports City Stadium a fortnight earlier, Al-Wehda had lost 2-0 to Al-Fateh in front of a crowd of only 2,455. The holy city welcomes around a million visitors each year for Islam’s famous Hajj pilgrimage, but this time people had come to worship Ronaldo. In bagging the 61st hat-trick of his career to put Al-Nassr in total…

BIG MAN! It’s a nickname for burly, bustling centre-halves and centre-forwards, but few merit the epithet quite like Gerry Armstrong. Burly centre-forward? Tick. Burly centre-back? Also tick, along with a few other positions over the years at Spurs, Watford, Mallorca and more. Big character? Without doubt, having grown up in west Belfast at the height of Northern Ireland’s Troubles. In My Story, My Journey he told many a tale of scrapes settled with a right-hander, usually from Armstrong himself, on or off the field. Big-game player? This is the man who scored the goal that secured his nation’s first World Cup appearance for 24 years, then bagged a famous winner against the hosts, Spain, at the tournament itself. That June 1982 evening in Valencia changed the Ulsterman’s life and had…

The half-and-half scarf is a hated thing in football, but any member of the McLean family could have been forgiven for sporting a woolly combination of Motherwell and Dundee United on May 18, 1991. The Scottish Cup showpiece that year will forever be known as ‘The Family Final’, as former Rangers midfielder Tommy McLean took charge of Motherwell while his elder sibling, Jim McLean, was managing Dundee United opposite him. Jim’s United battered Tommy’s Well in the opening stages, having a goal ruled out and whacking the inside of a post, but it was Motherwell forward Iain Ferguson who headed in the opener with half an hour played. United had created chances and just couldn’t take them – but, little did they know, Well goalkeeper Ally Maxwell had badly injured…

TEAMS Blackpool Macclesfield Stockport Rochdale Bristol Rovers Southampton Liverpool West Brom Cardiff England Aged 31, having played in all four divisions, you scored the winner against Scotland at Wembley with your first touch for England. That must have been quite a lot to take in… My whole career was about proving people wrong. I wanted to show I deserved to be in the squad. Mentally, I was on it all week in training and I think the other England players were surprised by my technical ability and touch. I was thinking, ‘Please give me game time’. After the match, my face was twitching – I couldn’t believe what had just happened. Yet 16 years earlier, your Liverpool dream had been crushed. What exactly happened? I grew up in nearby Kirby…

TEAMS Santos Chelsea PSV (loan) PSG Milan Brazil As a title winner in Brazil, the Netherlands, England, France and with the Selecao, what moments in your career stand out? The early stages of one’s career are always special. You enjoy every single moment: it’s your childhood dream coming true. For me, it was even better. I was part of that Santos side alongside Robinho, Elano and others in my first season as a professional, and we won the league playing some fantastic football. Then I was fortunate enough to fulfil several other dreams such as playing in Europe and for the Selecao, winning trophies basically everywhere I went – and titles are definitely the most special memories for a footballer. You were a powerful free-kick taker. Where did that talent…