OUT April 2019의 목차

Dear Reader, MY MOTHER IS INDISPUTABLY, GENETICALLY BEAUTIFUL. She has big, pool-like blue eyes; a curtain of dark, curly eyelashes; and a wide, contagious, Miss Congeniality smile. Each of these God-given traits is a laurel that Mom could have rested on for decades, but she never took them for granted. As a child, I would obediently follow her through department stores and hair salons, eye-level with the hemlines of the busy beauticians who fluttered around her, analyzing signs of aging, dehydration, or fatigue, and look up to see her face being massaged, moisturized, and painted. In 30 minutes flat, she’d go from tired mother-of-five to Park Avenue princess—just without the actual Park Avenue address. My mother was devoted to these rare moments of self-preservation, despite the protests of my father,…

“It doesn’t help that there aren’t a ton of bald femmes in popular culture with whom I might identify. Poot Lovato?” DO YOU EVER JUST STARE AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR until your eyes start to glaze over, like you’re trying to see past yourself? Or the hopes that something in your complexion might suddenly make itself clear—not a nascent blackhead, but some deeper truth about desirability? I do this sometimes, trying to bring into focus this newly blunted object in front of me—my balding head. I imagine some brighter future that doesn’t involve the reverse-Pangea effect that’s been happening there for the better part of a decade, the front and back of my scalp finally meeting as one expansive tundra. I have tried in vain to stave off male…

GET THEE GONE YOU WILL NEED: 1 GLASS-ENCASED CANDLE, WHITE OR BLACK ♦ PINK SALT ♦ SHARP-TIPPED KNIFE, SUCH AS AN X-ACTO KNIFE ♦ PAPER AND PEN ♦ GLASS DISH Choose a black or white candle. Either is fine. This is a very black-and-white spell, no doubt about it. You want this person, place, or thing gone from your life! White is associated with purification, and that is nice, but also beware weird superstitions about color that are, dare I say, racist. Black is not evil, wicked, or impure. It can represent the void, which is literally awesome and total mystery incarnate. Either color will work wonderfully for this and many other spells! With the tip of a sharp knife, carve a spiral into the wax at the top of…

1. He Wood by DSQUARED² “It’s a men’s perfume, but I know my audience. I’ve worn it since it came out 10 years ago. I actually met my girlfriend at the party DSQUARED2 held for the launch—I guess it smells like true love.” Retails for $80, 3.4 ounces LADYFAG, NIGHTLIFE PERSONALITY 2. The Afternoon of a Faun by Etat Libre d’Orange “I created this nonbinary perfume for pagans, fairies, and witches. It was partially inspired by Bandit—the classic androgynous scent from Robert Piguet. When I really want to get my genderfuck-witch on, I wear them together.” Retails for $149, 3.4 ounces JUSTIN VIVIAN BOND, PERFORMER 3. Mutiny by Maison Margiela “John Galliano was one of the first designers I worked with as a model, and we’ve developed a close relationship…

LOGAN PARLOR Chicago, IL The looks that emerge from Logan Parlor are nothing short of eye-catching, but that’s not all: This queer-friendly salon uses a gender-neutral pricing system. loganparlor.com NINTH CHAPTER BARBERSHOP Los Angeles, CA Chill vibes and a cohort of women barbers are the main points for this North Fairfax Avenue shop geared toward queer Angelenos. ninth-chapter-barbershop.business.site REFUGE FOR MEN Richmond, VA Black lesbian owner Dot “The Barber” Reid runs this space that also raises significant funds for local nonprofits, and doubles as a gallery for local artists. refuge4men.com X: THESALON Philadelphia, PA Nonbinary stylist Emily Costello traversed the country to teach others how to elevate their expertise. Now, their topnotch hairdressing touches down in Philly. xthesalon.com…

JUNE AMELIA ROSE WAS A TEENAGER the first time she tried to medically transition. She was already presenting very femininely in high school, wearing girls’ clothes from Hot Topic. She had even confided in a few girls she dated that she was trans, but never came out publicly, fearing that her family and friends might not believe or support her. She figured that if she could begin hormone replacement therapy—a combination of a generic testosterone blocker called spironolactone (or spiro, colloquially) and estradiol—she could more easily convince loved ones to accept her transition. But in order to get those medications, she would need a prescription. So at 15, Rose convinced her parents to let her start seeing a sex therapist, without explaining the full scope her intentions. By going through…

Dear Papi, I’m 25, just moved back to my hometown, and on three dating apps with no years of relationship experience under my belt. Papi, the truth is I’m beginning to think I’m…ugly. I feel I have a lot to give, but when it comes to getting a boyfriend, I’m scared I don’t look the part. I know it might sound shallow, but it’s all I can think about right now. What should I do, and will I ever find love? Yours, Ugly Duckling “I am encouraging you to think of beauty and attraction on different terms, with fewer absolutes.” Dear Duckling, I’m glad you came to me with this, because I’ve been clinically ugly for the past couple decades or so. I know it might sound hard to believe,…

A HOT PERSON EXPLAINS A COMPLICATED TOPIC. THIS MONTH, MODEL AND ACTIVIST YVES MATHIEU CONFRONTS THE STIGMA AROUND TATTOOED BODIES—ESPECIALLY BROWN ONES. A few years ago, an older woman spit on me as I was walking out of Panera. She said, “Such a beautiful boy, I don’t want to see you burn in hell.” When you’re heavily tattooed, especially on your face, people are quick to assume that you have no goals or ambitions, that you’re careless, unemployable, or that you have a shitty attitude. And with our current president, people have become more empowered to project hate onto those who look a certain way, making me an easy target—I’m a stop sign with legs. Some people don’t even realize they have this prejudice because they were cultured in a…

Ryan Burke The SFX Artist @RYBURK What do you do? I mostly work as a makeup artist and photographer, and I occasionally host nightlife events for Ladyfag and Susanne Bartsch. What’s your earliest memory of beauty? To be honest, probably Disney princesses and Star Wars characters like Queen Amidala. I wasn’t aware of the fashion or beauty industry, so fantasy was my introduction. It’s different now. I wonder, if I was 10 years old currently, how would I perceive beauty differently? What’s one beauty product you can’t live without? Nothing is more important than a good moisturizer. I change mine each time I finish a product. Currently, I’m using Le Soin Noir by Givenchy. What’s your favorite beauty trick? Lately, I’ve been into deep shadow in the bottom inner corner…

"Miss Fame is basically the mother that I never had." “CAN YOU WET THIS FOR ME?” Miss Fame asks the young woman next to her, handing her a pink Beauty Blender makeup sponge. It’s early February in Brooklyn, where the drag queen is about to pose for the first in a series of portraits captured by the fashion photographer, Paola Kudacki. After she’d chatted with each member of the team that day—from the manicurist to the wig master to the fashion stylist—she carefully took her perch in front of the mirror, where she’d go from Kurtis Dam-Mikkelsen to the contoured, tucked, and painted Miss Fame. At various points during the process, most of us would find ourselves watching her in the mirror, transfixed, before moving along. But one loyal subject…

MISCALLENEOUS DOMTOP PERFORMER, THEY/THEM I feel beautiful when I feel seen by a person, as opposed to being treated like an object: when someone gets to know me and they say, “You’re beautiful,” but in response to something that they see shining through. When I was younger in California and I was going out in West Hollywood, everyone used to tell me I was “cute for being Black.” No one ever told me I was cute for being good looking. I feel more beautiful and confident when I’m beating somebody up, domming somebody, or kicking an old guy in the balls. That’s when I feel the most beautiful, that’s when I feel more confident. WEST DAKOTA DRAG ARTIST, SHE/THEY I’ve come to understand that we’re conditioned to find things beautiful…

Founded by two beauty veterans—former Estee Lauder executive Randi Christiansen and Into The Gloss is a beauty brand on a mission: to inspire people to care. To that end, they’ve created a product range that’s skin—and the planet. Tick those boxes, honey! The five-piece unisex line of aptly named necessities includes a lubricant (“The Sex Gel”) that’s been a popular topic of discussion in the Out offices, as well as a nourishing body lotion and a body wash, shown here, that uses plant-derived surfactants to deliver a satisfyingly frothy rubdown. Available in two essential oil-based scents (eucalyptus and sandalwood), as well as a fragrance-free option, the wash is ideal for those with sensitive skin. Better yet, the entire suite of products is pH-optimized, ethically sourced, and sustainable, while all of…

“We love beauty because the journey toward it is a lot like love itself; it involves knowing there’s something worth fighting for.” My favorite beauty tips were written by Mark Aguhar, an Asian-American artist and trans woman who died by suicide in 2012. We never knew each other when she was alive, but I’ve thought about her frequently ever since she passed. Her words on love, strength, beauty, and rage are truisms that feel like spells—less magazine platitudes and tutorials, and more philosophical musings on how beauty is explicitly linked to systems of privilege, wealth, and even whiteness. As far as “beauty writing” goes, it took a lot of courage for Aguhar to carve out her own niche and take up space in ways queer folks were never taught. Most…

I CAN STILL VIVIDLY REMEMBER WALKING INTO Liza Minnelli’s apartment on New York City’s Upper East Side, just moments before she’d marry her husband, David Gest. I was the assistant to the legendary makeup artist Kevyn Aucoin who, alongside hair guru John Barrett and designer Bob Mackie, made up Ms. Minnelli’s glam pantheon for the occasion. There was so much to take in from that day—from the Andy Warhol artwork on the walls to Marisa Berenson and Elizabeth Taylor chatting idly amongst themselves. In the corner, a young boy named Evan was instructed by his mother, Diana Ross, to show off his dance moves for her dear friend, Michael Jackson. At one moment, after all the stars had gathered together like a constellation and left the room for the day’s…