Table of contents for March 30, 2020 in Globe

STEVEN SPIELBERG’s porn actress daughter has added a new role to her résumé — jailbird! Mikaela Spielberg, 24, was cuffed for domestic violence in Nashville after a scuffle with her pro darts-player fiancé, Chuck Pankow, and spent 11 hours in the clink, according to court records. The legendary filmmaker’s kid — who was adopted by Steven and wife Kate Capshaw as a baby — was charged with a misdemeanor and eventually freed on $1,000 bond. After her release, Pankow, 47, insisted “no one was hurt” and added: “We are both fine. It was a huge misunderstanding.” Her shocking arrest came days after Mikaela revealed her racy new career making solo adult videos, which she claims give her a way to “capitalize on her body” and a feeling of “empowerment and…

THE terrifying, fast-spreading coronavirus is wrecking the image of the popular Mexican beer with the same moniker! In a shocking poll by public relations firm 5WPR, 38 percent of suds-guzzling Americans say they’d never buy Corona beer during the current crisis, while 16 percent confused it with the killer flu. Also, computer searches for “corona beer virus” have rocketed. “This is a disaster for the Corona brand,” 5WPR CEO Ronn Torossian says. “After all, what brand wants to be linked to a virus which is killing people worldwide?”…

FORMER man and Olympic champ Caitlyn Jenner got caught with her pantyhose down in a celebrity sting where she was snared taking $25,000 to appear at a charity event. The 70-year-old sexs-wapper, who’s been appearing on British TV’s I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!, was trapped in a sting by U.K.-based Channel 4 into accepting the dough to promote their fake charity CUPPA (Cleaning Up Plastic Pollution in Africa). Caitlyn’s booking agency, MN2S, says the deal was for her to pose for a CUPPA photo shoot and have the pics posted on social media. Caitlyn’s legal eagle later insisted this was the only time she’d taken money for charity work and was going to donate the fee. “Apart from this, she has never been paid for charitable work…

CANDICE BERGEN, 73, is going to be a grandma! Only child CHLOE MALLE, 34, and husband GRAHAM ALBERT expect their first baby in May. Pregnant Shahs of Sunset star GOLNESA “GG” GHARACHEDAGHI, 38, is having a boy with help from a sperm donor. She’s naming him ELIJAH, after childhood celeb crush ELIJAH WOOD. Baby No. 4’s on the way for NFL quarterback MATTHEW STAFFORD and his wife, KELLY, who underwent brain surgery last year. The couple, married in 2015, have three young daughters. Former Sopranos stars MICHAEL IMPERIOLI, 54, and STEVE SCHIRRIPA, 61, are starring in a podcast show called Talking Sopranos. They’ll chat about old episodes of the iconic mobster series, starring the late JAMES GANDOLFINI. Singer ADELE is finally releasing a new record, her first album since her…

COMIC Billy Crystal has a racy formula for the success of his 50-year union with wife Janice — he’s “insatiable!” “What’s the secret to a 50-year marriage? We see other people,” deadpans the joking 71-year-old SNL alum and star of hit flicks like When Harry Met Sally and Analyze This. And Billy complains that he and Janice, 70, mom of daughters Jennifer, 47, and Lindsay, 42, are never included when media list Tinseltown’s hottest couples. “We will be married 50 years on June 4,” he boasts. “If that’s not the hottest couple in Hollywood.… Just think about it.”…

A VERMONT couple married for nearly 50 years had just enjoyed a cocktail on their deck and admired the winter scenery when talk turned to their inevitable death. Walter Scharrenberg, 79, told his 73-year-old wife, Linda, that he hoped he’d go first, saying, “I don’t how I would live without you.” Now he will have to: As they walked into their log cabin–style home in East Hardwick, a large chunk of ice fell off the roof and killed Linda! “Dad saw the ice come off the roof and hit her in the back of her head,” says the couple’s daughter, Jodine Meyers. “She landed face-first and was completely buried in the snow.” Paramedics worked to revive Linda for an hour. Eventually, they determined that even if she did wake up,…

WILLIAM SHATNER’S ex-wife was ordered to pony up her part of the couple’s horse semen collection! The 88-year-old actor won the stallion juice in the divorce settlement, according to court documents. The legendary Star Trek captain also trots off with two of their horses, along with equipment used for horse breeding. His ex, Elizabeth Shatner, who’s a horse trainer, will get two other nags and was granted visitation rights for the other two horses. As for the couple’s real estate, Capt. James T. Kirk keeps their Studio City house and Three Rivers Ranch in California. Elizabeth gets their homes in Malibu Cove and Versailles, Ky. The sci-fi hero decided to say “neigh” to the pair’s 18-year marriage in December 2019 and filed for divorce. They settled a month later and…

DISGUSTING movie mogul Harvey Weinstein is already getting payback for his sex attacks on dozens of gals — he suffered a brain injury when he fell and banged his noggin in New York’s scary Rikers Island slammer! The 67-year-old monster molester, who is banned from having the walker he used at his trial, reportedly toppled over and smacked his skull trying to walk without aid on March 7 and is now suffering severe headaches, says rep Juda Engelmayer. “He fell on his head and thinks he has a concussion,” he says. “His head has been pounding.” The 300-pound perv, who used his scary size and clout as a producer to force sex on actresses and female staffers, was first moved to Manhattan’s Bellevue Hospital following his Feb. 24 rape conviction,…

GRAVE NEW WORLD FOR NIC & GALPAL! Isn’t it romantic? NICOLAS CAGE, 56, gave his new 26-year-old girlfriend, RIKO SHIBATA, a creepy up-close-and-personal tour of his final resting place — the nine-foot-tall pyramid tomb he bought in New Orleans’ oldest cemetery! Attracting stares and glares, the odd couple weirdly wore matching black leather outfits during their macabre date. Days later, the gruesome twosome popped up at the Atlanta Aquarium and then at the American Museum of Natural History in NYC — again dressed in coordinating attire! Eeek! AIRHEAD ASHLEY HAS A CRAPPY IDEA! What the yuck? Model and first-time mom ASHLEY GRAHAM decided to change infant son Isaac’s poopy diaper on the floor — right in the middle of a Staples store aisle! Even grosser, the 32-year-old mannequin had the…

KOBE BRYANT’S grieving widow, Vanessa, is demanding the “harshest possible discipline” for sheriff’s deputies who allegedly shared gruesome photos of the Jan. 26 helicopter crash that killed the hoops legend and his 13-year-old daughter, Gianna. A source claims that first responders said images of the twisted wreckage and the victims’ remains were passed around — an act that Vanessa’s attorney calls “inexcusable and deplorable.” The L.A. County Sheriff’s Department says the “matter is being looked into.”…

A BRUTISH bully in Arizona fatally bludgeoned his four-year-old son with a guitar — and also used the instrument to injure his own mother! According to the Clarkdale Police Department, Joshua Hernandez Lord, 33, bashed little Isidro Jerome in the head, causing numerous skull fractures. Lord also attacked his 51-year-old mother and left her with a fractured skull — but she’s expected to recover. Authorities say Officer Carlos Godina, who responded to a 911 call, attempted to subdue Lord and even deployed his Taser, to no avail. But after the demented dad “continually” menaced the cop with a knife and made an aggressive move toward the officer, Godina shot him. Lord was pronounced dead at the scene. Isidro was airlifted to a hospital in Flagstaff but passed away the following…

DYING pop icon Neil Diamond bravely burst out of a two-year retirement forced by crippling Parkinson’s disease to heroically perform a heartbreaking farewell for fans! The plucky Sweet Caroline crooner, 79, shook off the debilitating effects of the killer illness to belt seven of his beloved hits for a grateful audience at Las Vegas’ MGM Grand Garden Arena. And it was all for charity, raising money for the Cleveland Clinic’s Lou Ruvo Center for Brain Health! The progressive disease causes tremors, rigidity, loss of balance and even delusions and hallucinations. “The disease has made it difficult to travel and perform on a large-scale basis,” his rep explains. Neil’s been “inspired” by actor Michael J. Fox’s battle with Parkinson’s, says an insider, and even reached out to the Back to the…

WIELDING a toothbrush on your pearly whites three times a day could ward off diabetes! Researchers at South Korea’s Seoul Hospital and Ewha Womans University College of Medicine looked at the oral hygiene of 190,000 people between 2003 and 2006. After an average follow-up time of ten years, 16 percent had developed diabetes and a similar number suffered from gum disease. But those who brushed their teeth more than the recommended twice a day had a 14 percent lower risk of diabetes! Poor oral hygiene can lead to inflammation and gum disease, which has been linked to many health complications, including stroke and heart disease.…

A CALIFORNIA woman has given new meaning to being green-fingered — she found out that she had been watering a fake plant for two years! In a hilarious Facebook post, Caelie Wilkes described caring for her “beautiful succulent” with a “watering plan” and even washing its leaves. “If someone else tried to water my succulent I would get so defensive,” she wrote. “I absolutely loved my succulent.” But when she tried to transplant it, Caelie found it was “completely plastic! “I pull it from the container it’s sitting on Styrofoam with sand glued to the top,” she wrote. “I feel like these last two years have been a lie.”…

JUST weeks after whining that his divorce from Jennifer Garner was his “biggest regret,” fast-moving movie hunk Ben Affleck whisked his sexy new leading lady, Ana de Armas, off to her native Havana for a romantic smoochfest! The 47-year-old movie Batman and Cuban-Spaniard Ana, 31, who plays his wife in their just-wrapped thriller Deep Water, were spied kissing at the Havana airport before boarding a private jet March 7. “They are definitely dating,” a source spills. Days earlier, the lovebirds were seen touring the Cuban capital and at a swanky Italian eatery, La Corte del Principe, smiling and posing for pics with fans. Ironically, just weeks ago Ben spilled his guts in an interview about his regret over his marriage to Jennifer, 47, his Daredevil leading lady and mom of…

SHARK TANK investing star Daymond John had some good news concerning the scary coronavirus — he predicts it will spawn a bunch of babies! The CEO of clothing giant FUBU says the scary bug will drive people to stay home — and that spells more sex! “We definitely will see a baby boom, 100 percent,” the 51-year-old New Yorker forecasts. “Yeah, we absolutely will. “It’s like when the blackout happened in New York and everybody stayed at home. It’s a whole bunch of babies nine months later.” He also believes the extra time at home could result in better health, with people exercising more and learning to improve their diets. People can “take advantage” of the time to see “how you can better your family or eat healthier or things…

TELEVANGELIST and convicted fraudster Jim Bakker is in legal hot water again — for trying to dupe disease-fearing followers into coughing up $125 for a baloney coronavirus cure! On his Feb. 12 edition of The Jim Bakker Show, the holy scammer claimed that his Silver Solution would “eliminate” the bug — which has killed more than 3,000 worldwide — in just “12 hours!” Shortly after, the 80-year-old preacher was ordered to stop his phony spiel by Lisa Landau, chief of the health care division of the New York State Attorney General’s Office. In a seething letter, Landau told the former jailbird to slap a disclaimer on the dodgy remedy, saying: “This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.” She adds: “The World Health Organization has…

POP prince Justin Bieber’s plunged into an intense mind-and-body cleanse that’s so extreme, he literally stinks — and has worried wife Hailey Baldwin and loved ones fearing he’s gone too far! An insider blabs that the 26-year-old bad boy has “become obsessive … and treats his cleanses and personal hygiene like it’s a military operation. “He’ll sit in the sauna for hours at a time and meditate nonstop to purge both his mind and his body from evils,” says the source. “And he’s drinking weird herb teas that make him smell.” In addition, the tattletale reveals, “he’ll eat nothing but sauerkraut and beets for days at a time.” Hailey, 23, has to live with his stinky spiritual and physical purge and “finds it plain weird, but Justin won’t listen and is…

BRITISH heartthrob James Norton romanced Emma Watson’s Meg March in Little Women — and now he’s digging up dirt as a Stalin-era journalist in the historical thriller Mr. Jones. Here are ten things you don’t know about the 34-year-old actor. 1 He was born in London, but his “idyllic” childhood was spent in North Yorkshire. 2 He’s a distant relative of former U.K. Prime Minister David Cameron. 3 Though he played an Anglican vicar on the TV series Grantchester, he says, “I can’t call myself religious.” 4 He claims he was “badly bullied” at a Catholic boarding school, which had a “hardcore style environment,” but adds: “A monk became my therapist.” 5 Amid a slew of reports, British bookies suspended bets on Norton’s being named the next James Bond. He…

A TWISTED creep pretended he was gay to lure a lesbian to his Georgia home, where he raped her! Sicko Taurence Callagain, 36, was recently convicted for the brutal sex attack. According to Fulton County District Attorney Paul L. Howard Jr., Callagain and the victim met while commuting on public transportation in Atlanta. Howard says Callagain led her to believe he was gay and not interested in women. But on Sept. 6, 2015, the thug offered her a ride and brought her to his place, where he choked and “violently” raped her! Howard claims Callagain told the terrified victim that if she fought back, “I will get my boys to come in and hold you down.” The brute faces up to 25 years behind bars at his upcoming sentencing.…

ARIES March 21 - April 20 Summer plans are altered after Venus shifts into Gemini, but keep an open mind. The changes will be for the better. Midweek brings some Rams a chance to move up the ladder at work, complete with a pay raise. Hit the town with your sweetie on Saturday to restore harmony and draw you closerthanthis! GEMINI May 22 - June 21 Monday finds you feeling unusually drained, but an early night gives you a boost, and you’re soon back on track for the demands of this busy week. Some Twins face a minor mechanical problem or travel delay, but it’ll be easily resolved. A letter brings cash luck linked to a job you quit years ago. LEO July 23 - Aug. 23 Lately it feels…

A TWO-LEGGED pooch from a Cincinnati suburb has been named a finalist in the contest to become the next Cadbury Easter Bunny! Laura Weber, owner of two-year-old coonhound Lieutenant Dan — who’s named after Gary Sinese’s amputee veteran in Forrest Gump — says he was born different but “knows how to live life to the fullest.” Like his namesake, the egg-cellent pup uses a wheelchair to get around, but Laura insists, “He doesn’t know he has a handicap!”…

AS A top U.S. attorney calls for him to be grilled in New York about his seedy friendship with pedophile financier Jeffrey Epstein, terrified Prince Andrew has hired the former lawyer of a bloodthirsty South American dictator! The disgraced Duke of York, 60, is being advised by Claire Montgomery, London’s top extradition expert, who charges a whopping $1,300 an hour and helped keep Chilean tyrant Gen. Augusto Pinochet from being tried for human rights abuses. Randy Andy has reason for alarm — he has angered Manhattan-based U.S. Attorney Geoffrey Berman by saying he’d squeal about the billionaire sex offender and then backing out. “Contrary to Prince Andrew’s very public offer to cooperate with our investigation … Prince Andrew has now completely shut the door on voluntary cooperation,” says Berman. Hires…

WHAT would he make of the smartphone? In 1936’s Modern Times, comedy genius CHARLIE CHAPLIN’s Little Tramp struggles to survive in an increasingly industrialized world. Employed on an assembly line, the ever-faster work pace leads to a mental breakdown, after which he sends the factory into chaos. Then follows a crazier series of mishaps until he meets a woman, played by PAULETTE GODDARD, and the wackiness continues again. The classic was the last of Chaplin’s silent films, after which the Little Tramp was retired.…

A THERAPY dog beat out a goat and a police pooch to be elected the pet mayor of a town in Vermont! Voters in Fair Haven cast 350 ballots, and cute Cavalier King Charles spaniel Murfee — who visits nursing homes, schools and hospitals — was declared the winner. WHAT the F-bomb! A 1792 law banning cursing in public has been repealed by Virginia legislators! The prohibition, which penalized “profane swearing,” carried a $250 fine, up from 83 cents when the rule was introduced. Heck, that’s a big increase! IN A piece of blazing irony, a former sprinkler factory in Springfield, Ohio, caught fire and has been declared a “total loss.” The conflagration at the Complete Fire Sprinkler and Safety building is being investigated but is not considered suspicious. STUDENTS…