Pick Me Up! -julkaisun December 17, 2015 -irtonumeron sisällysluettelo

From Kate Williams Head of Features 22 That’s how many times the word ‘actually’ is uttered in the film Love Actually. Enjoy 15 more surprising snippets about your fave Chrimbo romcom – visit www.lifedeathprizes.com and search ‘Love Actually’. What A Joker! There’s still plenty of time for Christmas shopping and some joker in my local supermarket has this idea for a last- minute pressie… I reckon he’s full of hot air. What A Wrap Star! Santa has elves to help with his wrapping. I have my neighbours’ cat! I was elbow deep in sticky tape when he popped in to supervise. At least he didn’t climb the Christmas tree, like your lot – see p29 … Ed’s Test £25!! Can you unscramble this eight-letter word to reveal something Kate…

I was already mum to Daisy, 6, and Charlie, 8 months, when I fell pregnant unexpectedly in September 2010. In the first few weeks, I suffered from terrible stomach pains and sickness. And at about seven weeks into the pregnancy, I discovered why. ‘It’s twins!’ the sonographer at Gloucestershire Royal Hospital beamed. ‘Oh, my God!’ I gasped. I was a single mum how would I ever cope? At about 16 weeks, I found out it was two boys, and it felt more real. ‘So as long as they’re healthy, that’s all that matters,’ I decided. Non-identical twins, Alfie and Logan, were born on 30 April 2011, and they were both perfect. Tantrums Back at home, I ran our house like an Army camp. When one twin was fed, the other…

My symptoms started back in May 2010. And they were terrible. The pits. The worst pain ever. I had stinging when I went for a wee, tummy pain and cramps. It felt like a urinary tract infection, so I went to my local A&E. ‘There’s no sign of an infection,’ the doctor told me. It didn’t go away on its own, so I was referred to a urology specialist at Hull Royal Infirmary, who sent me for tests. Ultrasounds, CT scans, a laparoscopy... Meanwhile, my symptoms were getting worse. I needed to get up in the night to use the loo, and my stomach was swollen. Finally, in November 2011, I had a diagnosis. Interstitial cystitis, a chronic, painful condition which made my bladder inflamed. I was put on medication,…

1 These are caused by drinking too much. 2 Many people will have headaches. 3 Drinking more alcohol will help relieve symptoms. 4 Don’t take painkillers if you’re hungover. 1 TRUE Alcohol is a diuretic, meaning it removes fluids from the body. Drinking too much of it can cause dehydration, leading to hangover symptoms. 2 TRUE These are a major symptom. Others include nausea and/or vomiting, an upset stomach, problems concentrating and tiredness. 3 FALSE ‘Hair of the dog’ is not a cure. If you do this, you can stop your body tissues repairing themselves, and you’re likely to be just staving off the hangover. Leave it 48 hours before drinking alcohol again. 4 FALSE The NHS says you can use over-the-counter painkillers to help lessen some of the symptoms.…

Parrot MiniDrone Jumping Sumo WiFi Controlled Robot With Camera, £103, www.qvc.co.uk Perfect for any gadget lover, this drone can spin, roll – and jump up to 80cm! Controlled wirelessly via smartphone or tablet, it streams footage direct to your device. Verdict: GENIUS! It’ll provide hours of fun. Bah Humbug In A Matchbox, £5.99, inamatchbox.com Strictly for Christmas humbugs! Why not replace their dinner with three ‘sweets’ in sage-and-onion stuffing, roast turkey and Christmas pudding flavours! There’s a party hat, menu and ‘Christmas sucks’ sticker, too… Verdict: BONKERS! Ideal for the Scrooge in your family, though! Pop-Up Xmas Toilet Tent, £29.99, www.olproshop.com This nifty, pop-up tent can house an outdoor loo or just provide a little extra storage over Christmas! One for the lads rather…

Bucks Fizz Marmalade Cake Serves: 8 Prep Time: 25 min Cook Time: 20 min 1 Preheat oven to 190C/Gas 5, and grease and line a 20cm cake tin. 2 Beat all cake ingredients except marmalade, orange slices and icing sugar together until smooth, then stir in marmalade. Spoon into tin, level surface and bake for 20 min until golden and cake springs back when pressed. Put on a cooling rack. 3 For icing, sift icing sugar into a bowl and add warm water until icing becomes thick enough to coat back of a spoon. Pour over cooled cake so it drizzles down sides. 4 Arrange orange slices on top of cake and finish with a dusting of icing sugar and cinnamon sticks.…

‘We were desperate to know what was causing the fits’ The room span as I took it all in. ‘I’m afraid Isla’s got Dravet syndrome,’ a consultant said. He explained it’s a rare form of epilepsy, causing lethal seizures triggered by the simplest things. The slightest commotion. Isla’s whole life flashed before me. She was only 18 months - too young for all of this. She’d begun having seizures at just 8 weeks old. They’d started off small, only lasting a few seconds. Then, at 9 months, she’d had one that lasted three hours. Rushed to hospital, she was put into an induced coma. When she came round, doctors explained she’d suffered some brain damage. ‘She might never walk or talk,’ a doctor warned us. We’d have to wait and…

Watching our little one trot off to his first day of nursery, my husband, Nick, 31, turned to me. ‘Ready for one more?’ he asked. We’d always talked about having two children and it felt like a good time to give Lyndon, 2, a little brother or sister. I was soon pregnant, and as I made my way to the first scan, I guessed that I must be at least 14 weeks gone - I had a big bump. To my surprise, I was only seven weeks pregnant. ‘It’s twins!’ the sonographer said. Nick was at work, so his mum, Alison, 53, was with me. We gasped as the sonographer checked to make sure everything was OK. Then it was her turn to gasp... ‘It’s triplets!’ she said. What?! We…

What A Treat! Tracy’s wedding anniversary was made extra-special… Reading the latest issue of Pick Me Up! I couldn’t put it down. I loved nothing more than settling on the sofa with a brew and my favourite mag. Then, one day in 2008, an advert for Pick Me Up! Bingo caught my eye. I’d always loved playing at the bingo halls with my friends. But working full-time at a local games arcade, I rarely had time to go any more. So, later that night, I signed up. Welcome, people in the chat rooms wrote. The other members were a friendly bunch. I quickly made friends. Trying a few of the games, I was soon enjoying myself on the slots. Then I found Sapphire Bingo, a 90-ball bingo room. ‘That’s my…

Topping up my glass of fizz, I danced away merrily. ‘Having a good time?’ my boyfriend, Paul, 35, asked. We were at his kart-racing team’s 2012 Christmas do at a nightclub in Mayfair, London, where his lot had a reserved area. Getting festive, as Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas Is You blasted, everyone sang at the top of their lungs. Later, I noticed a group of men chatting to a few girls right behind me. The men started getting rowdy and the girls looked uncomfortable. Then they started arguing. So much for festive cheer! Marching over, I shouted at them to stop. ‘It’s Christmas, you’re supposed to be having fun,’ I said, trying to diffuse the situation. Their rowdiness was disturbing our evening. Suddenly, a man shoved me…

Head pounding, eyes aching, I could hardly move. All I could do was lie in bed. ‘I’m sorry, I’ve got a migraine,’ I told my five boys, Craig, then 16, Nathan, 14, Callum, 11, and twins, Jordan and Mark, 8. It was summer 2007, and we’d just moved to Spain, but I’d started getting terrible migraines after drinking alcohol. And not to excess, either - half a glass of wine would wipe me out for three days. ‘I’ll just cut it out,’ I shrugged. But then I started getting crippling stomach pains, vomiting, diarrhoea. I thought I might have IBS, or be a coeliac. Once, I was so ill, I was rushed to hospital with suspected pancreatitis. Luckily, it wasn’t. ‘But something isn’t right,’ I moaned. ‘Start cutting things out…

I heard about Quidco in 2009, through an advert I’d seen on Facebook. I have to say, I was a little sceptical at first, wasn’t too sure about signing up... But, after doing some research, I found so many positive reviews. So, that July, I joined up and started using Quidco straightaway when I shopped. What do I normally buy that uses Quidco? I thought, as I scoured the Internet. Myself and hubby, Nigel, use Quidco for pretty much everything now. We even have our own separate Quidco accounts. The main things we splurge on are holidays and hotels. So far, we’ve used Quidco to get money for New York, Frankfurt, Portugal. But, of course, we use Quidco for everyday things, too. It’s brilliant for pet insurance, and clothes for…

Sitting with Mum, my phone beeped in my handbag. I didn’t need to look at it to know who was texting. ‘He won’t get the picture, will he?’ Mum said. She meant Matthew O’Keefe, my ex-boyfriend. But if he had it his way, there’d be no ‘ex’ about it. The stupid thing was, I’d tried so hard to make it work. Stuck around, always hoping that, one day, I’d wake up next to the fun-loving, caring bloke I’d met on a night out when I was 17. Rather than the controlling bully that Matthew had become. In fact, it’d started soon after we met, when he accused me of flirting with his mates. ‘I was just getting to know them!’ I protested. Matthew was 29, and I wanted to fit…

Preparing my son Ethan’s 2nd birthday party, in April 2013, everything was mounting up... The invites, party bags, sweets, paper plates. ‘There’s so much waste!’ I moaned to my hubby, Terry, 35. Working as an Education Officer for Edinburgh Zoo, I’d heard about eco-friendly cards made with a ‘recycled’ product... Elephant and rhino dung! Their waste contains undigested plant fibres, which are treated and transformed into eco-friendly paper. In January last year, I was on maternity leave with our second son, Joel, now 1, and I wanted a challenge. So, I found a UK company that supplied the poo paper, or ‘poo-per’, as I call it! Excited, I ordered two packs of A4 paper, planning to launch my own craft shop for kids’ cards online. Showing Ethan the paper, I…

SAGITTARIUS 23 Nov–21 Dec Try not to bite at the comments certain people make during the Christmas period – it’s what they want you to do. Showing you can be the bigger person is what’ll prove to them it’s time for them to move on. New romance beckons. Call: 09058 170 718* ARIES 21 March–20 April This Christmas, events will transpire that mean you won’t be following your usual traditions. You’ll also get to see a more personal side to someone who’s never before let down their defences to you – with dramatic results! Call: 09058 170 710* LEO 24 July–23 Aug You mix with old faces and new this festive season, and you start to learn that you like variety rather than predictability. By going with the flow, you…

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. And the most stressful if you have weight issues. Here’s a few suggestions for coping… If you want, have a blowout. But set an end date, and accept that once it’s come, you’ll be back on that exercise bike working harder than ever before. If you decide to keep up your plan at Christmas, stick to it. Don’t think you’ll just have one more – as one more will become two more. And two more then becomes regret. If someone at a party is tempting you with a mince pie, stick to your guns. Explain the situation and ask others to respect it. If your friend or partner is on a weight-loss plan, be understanding. Don’t say things like: ‘One little chocolate…

Overindulgence Many of us are familiar with festive overindulgence. Nasty symptoms include headaches, nausea, diarrhoea, constipation and tummyache. Regular overindulgence can lead to a range of health issues, such as fatigue, chronic stomach problems and weight gain. Moderation is key – enjoy yourself over Christmas, but eat healthily in the days around it. Give Yourself A Lift Christmas isn’t Christmas without mince pies, but make them healthier by using filo pastry instead of puff pastry. Just as tasty and a lot fewer calories!…

My boy, Ethan, was 6 months old. And there was something seriously wrong. He’d started wheezing a lot, like he was gasping for air. Worried, my husband, Ben, 33, and I took him to the GP, who kept diagnosing him with chest infections, but Ethan seemed to be getting worse. Then one day in April 2013, he went floppy and blue, so I took him to A&E at the Royal Victoria Infirmary, Newcastle. He improved after a couple of hours, but it kept happening, so Ben and I were back and forth to the hospital. Ethan was referred to a specialist, who diagnosed him with a dairy allergy and asthma, a chronic lung condition. He was given a preventer inhaler and daily medication, and he needed checks at the hospital…

‘Six weeks on, the lump grew to the size of a golf ball’ Amy Jackson, 27, Cleethorpes Ihadn’t felt true love before I met Scott Jackson. Though he was a year above me at school, we didn’t get together until October 2007. Recently single, I wasn’t looking for romance. It was my first night out since having my daughter, Kacey, then 2 months. But, funny and gorgeous, Scott, now 28, stole my heart. We soon moved in together, having started our own family - we’ve Declan, now 6, and Connor, 4. Great with Kacey, she started calling him ‘Daddy’. Life was hectic, but everything I’d ever wanted. Then, in May 2012, checking my breasts in the shower, I felt a pea-sized lump near my right armpit. Worried, I saw my…

1 Tesco Broccoli & Stilton Soup, 600g, £1.60 This thick and creamy, mild-flavoured soup is studded with little flecks of broccoli. Serve it with a big chunk of crusty bread – warmed in the oven if you prefer! – for a hearty, and very tasty, winter-warmer! 2 Morrisons Broccoli And Stilton Soup, 600g, £1.38 We liked the large and unexpected chunks of tender broccoli in this otherwise creamy soup, which has a stronger vegetable flavour than that of Stilton. Still, a rather flavoursome and filling little number. 3 Sainsbury’s Broccoli & Stilton Soup, 600g, £1.40 A lovely, thick soup with a good, tangy taste of Stilton at first, followed by the mellow flavours of the veg – this one has a great balance that tastes rich, creamy and really satisfying.…

THE CASE The Ramsey family had enjoyed a Christmas with all the trimmings. That night, John, 56, Patsy, 39, their son, Burke, 9, and daughter, JonBenet, 6, went to bed happy and satisfied. But the next day, Boxing Day 1996, JonBenet was found wrapped in a blanket in the basement of the family’s home. A rope was wrapped round her neck and she was dead. Today, police are no closer to catching her killer than they were almost two decades ago. And, earlier this year, the police chief who led the investigation made a startling admission. His officers had mishandled the case... So JonBenet’s killer remains free, her brutal murder one of the most baffling of recent times. THE RANSOM NOTE That morning, the Ramseys had been up at the…

I’m always up for having fun. That’s why I joined Pick Me Up! Bingo three years ago. I was a regular at the local bingo halls, loved having a natter. The idea of playing in my living room sounded perfect, though. And I soon got chatting in the chat rooms. ‘It’s like we’re all down the bingo hall!’ I told my son, Paul, 27. Tiki Bingo quickly became my favourite. In October last year, I was having a quick game when I saw Winner! flashing on my screen. When I checked my account balance, I was stunned. I’d won £1,000! I was delighted - and I knew exactly what I wanted to spend the money on. A new car! So I bought myself a secondhand Ford Focus Estate. I carried…

Food Swaps Walk off those CHRISTMAS CALORIES! If you really do want to have your cake – and eat it – you can always walk off the calories afterwards! Here’s how far you’ll need to briskly stroll to work off these Christmas treats… • 100g Christmas pudding with custard and brandy butter…6¼ miles • A 480g box of Quality Street…23½ miles • Full Christmas dinner plus two glasses of wine… just under 13 miles • A glass of mulled wine…2½ miles • 10 dinner mints…4 miles 7,000 …that’s how many calories most of us will scoff our way through on Christmas Day! No surprise really because we eat huge meals, snack between them and drink more than on any other day of the year. Cheers! (The diet starts next week!) Flattering Fashion Dress it up…

CANADA: Frozen To Death In the city of Winnipeg, the winters are fearsome. Snow covers the ground from November to March, and temperatures regularly dip to minus 20. But, in November 1984, Candace Derksen, 13, took nothing but pleasure in the winter wonderland in which she’d grown up. After a snowball fight with a friend, she’d started making her way home from school. But she never arrived. By 7pm that evening, her frantic parents, Wilma and Clint, called the police. A search party was launched. And, for three long months, the city of Winnipeg searched for Candace. Christmas came and went with no sign. And, in January 1987, any hope her family had left crumbled when Candace’s body was finally found. The teenager had been tied up with twine and…

Get more for your sales shopping by earning extra cash through Quidco, the UK’s No1 cashback site where you can earn £££s and get cashback from over 4,300 retailers! Go to www.quidco.com/pickmeup  and sign up for great offers. 1 Browse through thousands of retailers to check out their deals. 2 Click through to the retailers of your choice and start shopping for whatever you want. The prices will be the same as if you’d gone directly to the sites, but you’ll end up getting a percentage of your money back.…

There was a tap on the window and, moments later, Dad’s sheepish face appeared at the kitchen door. ‘Here you are, Julie,’ he smiled, offering Mum the biggest bunch of flowers I’d ever seen. ‘I’m still cross, you know,’ she replied, making him suffer. But that night, Mum and Dad were cuddled up by the TV in each other’s arms, as if nothing’d ever happened. Mum and my dad, Michael, had been together for 23 years, but their relationship had had its ups and downs. One day they’d be shouting, the next wrapped around each other, making me and my brother, Jack, and sister, Lauryn cringe. ‘We can’t live with each other, can’t live without each other,’ Mum used to say with a smile. She’d joke that they sometimes needed…

My little sister, Kailee, 14, was a social butterfly, a friend to everyone. So it was no surprise when she pointed out a new friend, Stathis Kirkpatrick, then 18, in town one day. ‘He’s new,’ she smiled. ‘He doesn’t really know anyone.’ Typical Kailee, always reaching out to others. It was coming up to Christmas and, that December, we all piled round to my great-grandma Genie’s house for a delicious celebration dinner and presents. Back at school after the holidays, Kailee was excited to see her friends... At 10.30pm on 20 January 2011, after watching TV, she went up to bed. Then, around 7am next morning, I went to wake her for school. ‘We’re going to be late,’ I yelled, going into her bedroom. But her bed was empty. She…

Winter sadness QI always get very low during the winter. The thought of having to see people over Christmas and be sociable when I’m feeling like this is stressing me out. What can I do? Carla, Liverpool A Mood does drop in cold weather with reduced daylight hours, so ensure you keep warm and get outside as much as possible. Starting a new interest can carry you through, but if you’re unable to beat it, see your GP. Swollen legs Q I’ve always had painful, fat legs. Dieting doesn’t help, so I assumed it was water retention, but support stockings aren’t helping. I’m sick of not being able to wear party dresses! Elle, East London A Abnormal and painful fat distribution in legs, thighs and buttocks, called lipoedema, is a…

I didn’t just believe in miracles. I’d come to depend on them. And one was perched on my ‘ hospital bed, about to set off on a two-hour drive home. ‘It’s such a long way,’ I said. ‘You’ll wear yourself out driving every day...’ But Ben shook his head. ‘I want to be here for you,’ he said. It was November 2014. I’d been laid up in hospital since that September. And, every day, Ben had visited me, even though he lived 150 miles away in Essex. But, even though I was worried he’d exhaust himself, I was glad to have him there. We’d met in March on a group skiing holiday. My first holiday in eight years. I was a single mum to Cameron, 14, and Josh, 13, which…

'My work here is done!’ Eddie slayed our tree! Although a softie, he isn’t a big fan of the festive season! Mandy Mason,46, Newton Abbott This is 5-year-old Bert, overseeing the Santa Express from the shelter of our tree’s festive branches. Clare Leahy, 40, Winkleigh Playful Alfie looks as if butter wouldn’t melt. But we didn’t even get as far as decorating the tree before he’d dived into the tinsel! Faith White, 40, Littlehampton Rusty, 2, loves burying himself in giftwrap and the Christmas tree is also a favourite festive spot! Leasa Allen, 32, Great Torrington Two-year-old Morris give us a 'What do you mean I’m not supposed to be up here’ look! Lynne Newton, 48, Spennymoor Cheeky Anna loves getting tangled in the tree’s branches. If she’s not careful,…

Scott says: ‘I’ve tried to stay strong for Amy and the kids, to protect them as best I can. Amy’s an inspiration – and stubborn – which is why I know she’ll never give up. I can’t put into words how much I admire and love her. ‘I’d always planned to propose. Cancer’s taught me family’s everything. Every day, I tell Amy and the kids I love them. We’re focused on making every day special, especially this Christmas. As long as we’re together, that’s special enough for me.’…

Christmas Eve Sprout Pizza Serves: 4 Prep Time: 40 min (plus proving time) Cook Time: 20 min White sauce: 1 Preheat oven to 220C/ Gas 7. 2 Heat ½tbsp oil and fry bacon until just starting to crisp. Remove with a slotted spoon and drain on kitchen paper. Add another drizzle of oil to pan, tip in sprouts, season and cook for 3-4 min until softened and starting to caramelise around edges. Set aside. 3 To make sauce, melt butter in a small pan, add garlic and let it sizzle for 30 sec. Pour in cream, grate over nutmeg, season and simmer for 5 min until thickened and reduced. 4 Spread pizza base thickly with salsa, cover with…

Families come in all shapes and sizes. Mum and Dad split up when I was young, and I’d grown up living with my mum, Michelle, 38, and sister, Shannon, now 18. But me and my dad, Michael, 45, were still really close. He had 10 kids altogether, but when I was younger he always made time to take me to the park. And now he regularly made the half-hour taxi ride from his flat in Hulme to pop round for a cuppa. Or sometimes we’d head out to my local, The Dover, with his partner, Paula Jolly, 37. She’d been my stepmum for about 13 years, and we got on well. On 15 December last year, Dad and Paula came round to see me, as they often did. ‘Fancy going…

As my partner, Craig, finished painting the living room walls, he flopped down on the settee. ‘You look shattered,’ I told him. ‘Must be all the DIY,’ he sighed. I wasn’t sure. Craig hadn’t been himself for months. Initially, we put it down to the long hours he worked as a mechanic, and helping look after our daughter, Lily, 1. But now the whites of his eyes had turned yellow and he’d lost 3st in as many months. He needed to see a doctor, but you know what blokes can be like. Finally, he agreed to make an appointment. The next day, the GP called. ‘He wants me to come back in straightaway,’ Craig told me. At the surgery, the GP explained there was a problem with Craig’s liver, and…

As a postman carried out his rounds in Fennsbank Avenue, High Burnside, Scotland, a woman came running out of a house. ‘There’s been a murder!’ she cried, before calling the police. It was September 1956, and she was the home help for the Watt family. When the police arrived, they found Marion Watt, 45, her 16-year-old daughter, Vivienne, and Marion’s sister, Margaret Brown, 41, inside. All three had been shot at close range, and, although she hadn’t been sexually assaulted, Vivienne’s clothes had been pulled above her head. Suspicion fell on Marion’s husband, William - a former policeman turned bakery owner - when it was revealed he’d been unfaithful. Though he was away on a fishing trip in Argyll at the time, despite the impossibility of him driving back in…

FEEL THE FROST Get ready for the new film with these Star Wars Lightsaber Lollies! You can now pick up two boxes in Asda for just £3 (normally £2 each) until 6 January. Great Gifts Get your loved ones personalised pressies for less this Christmas with an exclusive 12% off all gifts at GettingPersonal.co.uk with the code PMUXMAS12 until 20 December. FESTIVE TREAT You can’t go wrong with a classic mince pie! Prices start from just 45p for one or £1.50 for six at Greggs until the end of December. Finishing Touches Looking for some unique wrapping this year? Enter the code promo20 at www.domandgeri.com to receive an exclusive 20% off its range of personalised, cards, wrapping and banners until 17 December. FIZZY FUN Just in time for party season,…

Giant STDs, £8.99, www.firebox.com Based on their microscopic counterparts, there are five different giant STD soft toy designs to choose from, including herpes and syphilis. Mocoro Robot Cleaning Ball, £24.99, www.firebox.com This robotic microfibre duster cleans as it rolls around the floor, and changes direction if it hits an obstacle. Also works as a cat’s toy..! Darth Vader/Storm Trooper Look-alite, £19.99, Maplin A great gift for kids – or Star Wars fans! The funky LED mood light is battery-operated, but can also be powered by a micro USB cable. May the Force be with you! Dog Elf Jumper, £5, Morrisons Get your furry friends into the seasonal spirit! Comes in Santa, Snowflake and Christmas Tree designs, too! My Side Your Side Pillow Cases, £35.99,…

My eldest daughter, Courtney, then 13, was close with her great-nanna, Elsie, 84. After school, she’d visit Nanna and, at Christmas, the pair made crackers together, helped cook the dinner and put presents out. Only, in December 2012, Nanna was taken into John Radcliffe Hospital with stomach and bowel problems. ‘Christmas must just go to Nanna, then!’ I suggested. So Courtney, my youngest, Megan, 7, me and my hubby, Lee, 43, took gifts and food to Nanna’s ward on 25 December. ‘Happy Christmas!’ she smiled. Only, Courtney noticed other elderly patients had no visitors, let alone presents. ‘It’s unfair,’ she said. ‘Life often isn’t fair, love,’ I sighed. Sadly, in March 2013, Nanna passed away. Courtney was devastated and, two months on, she was diagnosed with ME - chronic fatigue.…

We all love a bargain, don’t we? I’ve been a savvy shopper ever since I began buying Christmas presents myself, aged 16. Then a student, working part-time in a shop, cash was tight. That summer, I bought presents each week, so my budget would stretch. ‘Very sensible, you bore!’ my mate, Holly, then 17, teased. I noticed the shops bump up prices in the run-up to December. Buying last-minute has never appealed, though. Especially as I’ve now got my boyfriend, Abe, 25, mum, Jane, 48, dad, Richard, 50, brother, Jack, 23, grandparents and all my mates to buy for. Instead, I hit the January sales, buying stocking fillers and reduced designer clobber ready for the following year. I hide the goods in our spare room. Now a paralegal, my budget’s…

Who ate all the pies?And all the crisps. And all the chocolate bars, biscuits, cakes and pastries - little old me! Not that I could be called little. Every day was the same. At 7am, I’d have a bacon omelette for breakfast. With cheese. Then I got two trains to work as a payroll manager. On the first train, I’d have crisps and a chocolate bar. Next, I’d change train at a station with a McDonald’s and have two breakfast muffins, along with a mocha coffee. And there’s more. As soon as I got to work, I’d head for the staff canteen. It did the best bacon butties ever. I’d have three sweet pastries at my desk during the day. Perfect with the sugary coffees I drank. At home in…