Globe -julkaisun March 27, 2023 -irtonumeron sisällysluettelo

CHEAP SHOT Thorny funnyman CHRIS ROCK — who recently roasted rival Will Smith for his infamous Oscar slap — snags a grocery store bouquet in NYC THE NEXT STEP Former Dance Moms terror ABBY LEE MILLER has landed on her feet — five years after cancer and spinal surgery left her relying on a wheelchair ANCIENT HISTORY Comedian MEL BROOKS, star of the 2000 Year Old Man skit, is creeping closer toward his legendary TV character BUM RAP Juice singer LIZZO fattens up her bottom line with a booty-shaking concert in Italy MISSION: IMPAWSIBLE ANDIE MacDOWELL’s pup is one snappy dresser — but the former rom-com cutie has gone to the dogs! BALLER MOVE Screen hoopster WOODY HARRELSON holds court at the NYC premiere of Champions THE BEST CELEB PHOTOS…

DEVASTATED Drew Barrymore crawled into a bottle and plunged into a dark depression as her world collapsed after a heartbreaking divorce — and things got so ugly even her therapist walked out! Now Drew’s bestie, Charlie’s Angels co-star Cameron Diaz, is dishing on the 50 First Dates beauty’s terrible tailspin, saying it “was difficult to watch.” In fact, Drew’s boozing was so bad she adamantly refused to stop, so her therapist Barry Michaels walked out, telling the star: “I can’t do this anymore,” the TV talk show host recalls. “It was really about my drinking,” says Drew. “I said, ‘I get it. I’ve never respected you more. You see I’m not getting better. And I hope, one day, that I can earn your trust back.’” After three years drowning in…

MUDSLINGING divorce documents reveal The Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Drew Sidora, 37, is accusing hubby Ralph Pittman, 40, of being a “serial cheater and adulterer” who subjected her to mental and financial abuse! The Step Up actress — who filed to end the couple’s rocky eight-year marriage just 61 minutes before her estranged spouse did the same — also charges Pittman got “physically aggressive” and caused her to fall to the ground during a scuffle over a phone.…

NOTORIOUS Colombian drug king Pablo Escobar’s deadly cocaine hippos are finally being shipped off to zoos around the globe — 30 years after his reign of evil was stopped by lawmen’s bullets! Escobar, whose Medellín Cartel controlled 80 percent of the world’s cocaine trade in the 1980s, left behind a trail of bloodshed and heartbreak when he died at 44 in a hail of gunfire — and four hippos in his personal zoo. The critters’ numbers have spiraled out of control in their new homeland’s swamps. The horde of hippos — which a top environmentalist calls the “world’s worst invasive species” — now numbers 150. The beasts have been destroying the ecosystem, befouling waterways and rampaging through towns for decades. What’s more, the massive mammals’ filthy habits — they fan…

TALK show legend Sally Jessy Raphael is telling pals she’s ready to ditch her widow’s weeds and jump onto the dating-go-round. The 88-year-old chatterbox has been in mourning two and a half years since losing the love of her life, 90-year-old husband Karl Soderlund, who died from complications of Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s. Famous for her flashy red-framed glasses, she and Soderlund, were married 57 years. Now, pals say, Sally, who’s worth $40 million, is missing a man in her life and wants to get out and find one. “Sally is an intelligent, interesting woman, so she’s looking for an intelligent, attractive guy in his 70s or 80s,” says a longtime friend. “While she wants him to be an ordinary Joe, he has to be able to pay his own bills!” The…

WHEN it comes to songwriting, Miranda Lambert is laughing at ex-husband Blake Shelton — all the way to the bank, tipsters tattle! Miranda, 39, recently scored a career first when Morgan Wallen hit No. 1 on the country music charts with Thought You Should Know, the first time Miranda has co-written a chart-topper for another artist. The career milestone — and the big bucks that come with it — has Miranda thinking back to advice she gave Blake, 46, before their nine-year relationship ended in 2015, spies say. “Miranda has always been highly creative and highly motivated and she encouraged Blake to write his own songs, but she thought he was too lazy, too caught up in the next party to give it his all,” snipes a source. While Miranda…

PRIMA DONNA pundits Tucker Carlson and Sean Hannity are panicked over their future at FOX News, according to sources who say the dueling divas are ready to throw each other under the bus to save their big-bucks jobs! The bratty big shots are walking on thin ice after FOX boss Rupert Murdoch admitted under oath some of his cable network’s most famous faces publicly “endorsed” Donald Trump’s election fraud claims, even though they privately didn’t believe them. CEO Murdoch’s shocking revelations came in a deposition for a $1.6 billion defamation lawsuit against FOX by Dominion voting machines company, which was accused by network pundits of fraudulently flipping Trump votes to Joe Biden in the 2020 presidential election. Sean admitted under oath he didn’t believe Trump’s “stolen election” claims, despite supporting…

It’s a boy for Nope star KEKE PALMER, 29, and fitness pro husband DARIUS JACKSON, who welcomed their first baby, LEODIS ANDRELLTON JACKSON. They’re calling the tot Leo. Vanderpump Rules alum STASSI SCHROEDER, 34, and hubby BEAU CLARK, 42, have baby No. 2 on the way. Seems MADONNA, 64, traded model beau ANDREW DARNELL, 23, for an older man: a 29-year-old boxing coach aptly named JOSH POPPER. The knockout muscleman was on an episode of Bravo’s Summer House. Bottoms up to HEIDI KLUM’s 18-year-old model daughter, LENI, who exposed her biggest asset for a recent pantless photo shoot — wearing high-rise peekaboo fishnet hose, sans panties, for the cheeky pose. Honey Boo Boo’s boyfriend DRALIN CARSWELL, 21, got arrested for DUI and fleeing police in Georgia — while the 17-year-old…

RAVISHING redhead Madelaine Petsch returns to Riverdale this month as pampered rich girl Cheryl Blossom. The CW’s dark, soapy spin on the Archie Comics universe is kicking off its seventh and final season. Madelaine reveals the drama’s remaining episodes are “shaking things up.” Here are ten things you don’t know about the 28-year-old performer. 1 The Washington State native split the first ten years of her childhood between the U.S. and South Africa, her parents’ home country — but she attended high school in Tacoma. 2 She speaks Afrikaans, the West Germanic-based language of South Africa. 3 Madelaine was raised vegetarian and eventually turned vegan — ditching all animal products from her diet. 4 As a kid, she was bullied at school because of her accent and her flaming locks.…

TROUBLED pop idol Aaron Carter was murdered, according to the I Want Candy singer’s mom, who charges pooh-poohing police dismissed the longtime druggie’s death as an overdose. Heartbroken Jane Schneck recently released disturbing pics of the California bathroom where her lifeless son was found on Nov. 5 at age 34. Some photos appear to show feces smeared on clothing and the floor, and another captured a tub filled with murky green water, where Aaron’s corpse had sat for hours. Jane claims cops never treated the area “as a possible crime scene” because of the onetime poster boy’s past struggles with prescription pills and mental illness — and allowed gawkers to “tromp through” his Lancaster home taking pictures! The peeved parent also fumes, “Aaron had a lot of death threats and…

FOLLOWING his double-murder conviction, fat-cat lawyer Alex Murdaugh got another cruel cut when his styled red hair was buzzed off by prison officials leaving him bald as a cue ball. The 54-year-old pill-popping patriarch of a prominent South Carolina political clan’s close shave came just hours after he was sentenced March 3 to consecutive life terms for murdering his 52-year-old wife, Maggie, and their 22-year-old son, Paul, in 2021. Noted therapist Dr. Gilda Carle says being turned into a chrome dome is a cold, harsh slap of reality. “It certainly has to be a shock to his system and a shock to his psyche,” says Dr. Carle. “It’s a very hard symbolic gesture, like when Delilah cut off Samson’s hair — he lost all of his power.” After sitting through his…

PRINCE HARRY reveals psychedelics are a “fundamental” part of his life, helping him to remove “the filters” blocking true happiness — and paving the way to “deal with the traumas and the pains of the past.” Apparently, using the mind-bending drugs gave him the freedom to trash his father, King Charles, brother Prince William, sister-in-law Kate and stepmother Camilla in a controversial memoir, Spare, and a bunch of tell-all TV interviews. That’s a good thing — even if his charges of racism, insensitivity and downright meanness in the royal family don’t ultimately stand the test of time. However, magic mushrooms don’t appear to have helped Harry clarify his own insufferable hypocrisy. He and his wife, Meghan, are greedy, selfish, petty, arrogant, ungrateful, do-as- I-say-not-as-I-do twits whose consciousness doesn’t appear to…

ACTION hunk Keanu Reeves is in a long love-in with business partner Alexandra Grant, but pals say the 58-year-old John Wick assassin has vowed to never marry following his devastating double-loss two decades ago. While Reeves’ career was rocketing with the 1999 blockbuster flick Matrix, he was locked in a heavy romance with brunette beauty Jennifer Syme — and was set to wed the actress when she happily became pregnant with his child. But the couple was heartbroken when the baby was stillborn after a premature birth, and the emotional turmoil drove the lovers to split. They reconciled in 2001 and were planning a new future when tragedy struck again. Jen was killed in a car accident that April, leaving Keanu shattered. “That double tragedy of losing his child and…

NEW mom Paris Hilton had baby Phoenix via surrogate — and the hot heiress hollers she has “20 more boys” ready to roll at the clinic where she and hubby Carter Reum have seven embryos on ice! The Simple Life star, 42, says she first froze her eggs on the advice of Kim Kardashian and decided on a surrogate because she is “scared” of childbirth. Now, she and Carter are banking embryos. “We’ve done it seven times. I have all boys!”…

FRANTIC FOX News staffers are secretly planning to jump ship as the $1.6 billion defamation lawsuit against the channel by Dominion Voting Systems gains ground! Insiders exclusively reveal to GLOBE they fear the voting machine company’s lawsuit could bankrupt the conservative media giant. Mega-billionaire network boss Rupert Murdoch has admitted under oath FOX “endorsed” lies spread by hosts Jeanine Pirro, Sean Hannity, Lou Dobbs, Maria Bartiromo and others. “I would have liked us to be stronger in denouncing [the stolen election claims] in hindsight,” Murdoch admits. Says a head writer at the crippled cable outfit, “I gotta get out of here before the ship sinks,” and the staffer apparently isn’t the only employee who shares the shocking sentiment.…

GG BLASTS PHONY WEIGHT-LOSS LIARS While a lot of Hollywood fast talkers insist their recent dramatic weight loss is all about hard workouts, dieting and/or forgoing booze — and not a trendy diabetes medication — Shahs of Sunset alum GOLNESA “GG” GHARACHEDAGHI, 41, confesses to dropping 11 pounds on a generic version of Ozempic in a how-to video demonstrating injection techniques! “I am on the weight-loss shots, honey, OK,” she spills. “I’m just not going to lie about it because I always keep it real about what is fake.” Blasting phony baloney deniers, she snips: “If you see people out there who just got skinny so fast all of a sudden and claimed they got healthy for the first time in their lives or that they got sober from alcohol…

CHRISTINA AGUILERA has let the genie out of the bottle — the 42-year-old singer admits she plumps up her puss with anti-wrinkle injections to make her feel better about herself! “I’m really into feeling more self-assured as you get older,” reveals the four-octave-range pop diva. “Viewing aging as a negative is a super old-school approach!” Christina says opting for medical enhancements is a “personal conversation,” but admits that the pressure of fame “can complicate your view of yourself.”…

A FIENDISH Florida pastor preyed on his own flock by illegally taking control of their church’s Pompano Beach property — and selling it out from under them for $600,000 to feed his drug habit, lawmen say. According to the Florida Department of Law Enforcement (FDLE), parishioners and founders of New Jerusalem Baptist Church filed complaints in April 2022 charging James Edward Smith II, 49, helped himself to the organization’s assets and funds. FDLE agents collared the married father of four after a nearly yearlong investigation, which they claim revealed the unholy terror forged a quitclaim deed and sold the church’s land for a six-figure windfall. Police say a search of the sinful suspect’s residence turned up heroin, methamphetamine, marijuana and a stolen firearm. Court records show Smith had served time in…

A WOMAN married off against her will when she was in sixth grade is now waging a war on America’s worst parents — folks who turn young daughters into child brides, often to the monsters who raped them! Disgusted Dawn Tyree, now 51, says she had no way out when her foul father and evil stepmother forced her at age 13 to marry a sex creep 19 years her senior. She claims the guy worked as her parents’ nanny, groomed her from age 11 and knocked her up two years later! Dawn insists her parents, who she refuses to name, should have protected her, but decided to save the 32-year-old pervy predator instead — and keep him out of prison. “The solution was marriage,” says Dawn, who lives in California.…

INSECURE young Julia Roberts quit the lead role in Shakespeare in Love — costing the studio a whopping $6 million, but opened the door for Gwyneth Paltrow to later win an Oscar for the part, according to producer Edward Zwick, who calls the Pretty Woman “a disaster!” Ironically, Universal Studios only agreed to fund the flick if Roberts, then 24 — who’d just zoomed to stardom in the 1990 hooker rom-com — would take the role of Viola De Lesseps. The studio had already plunked down $6 million for preproduction. “The mere possibility of having the Pretty Woman wearing a corseted gown got the studio excited enough to cough up the dough,” Zwick says. Roberts was fixated on having Daniel Day-Lewis play Shakespeare, but he was committed to making In…

LONER Lady Gaga has performed her pop tunes in front of millions — but the Shallow singer claims she craves “more of a life of solitude.” Gaga gabs, “It’s really nice to just have time to be alone, and be expansive, and know that you’re enough. I wish I could tell my younger self that.” Though the Oscar-nominated A Star Is Born actress, 36, is known for hitting the red carpet in attention-grabbing gowns, she insists, “I actually don’t spend a lot of time in Hollywood.” Gaga also shares fame and fortune ain’t all it’s cracked up to be and explains, “I have traveled the world and seen the happiest people in the poorest parts of the world. In the richest homes I meet the saddest and most depressed people.”…

TV CHEF Rachael Ray’s departure from TV has left kitchen rivals Martha Stewart and Giada De Laurentiis snickering in their soufflés, tipsters tattle! Kitchen cutie Rachael, 54, finally got kicked to the curb after years of crummy ratings and even her perky personality couldn’t save her from the dumpster, according to spies who insist her cooking rivals are relishing the situation. “Martha and Giada never understood how Rachael got so far anyway,” spills an insider. “They think she’s uncouth and not on a par with their creative genius. “They’re surprised her show lasted 17 seasons.” The highly competitive pair see Ray’s ouster as a major victory, even though Rachael is already getting lucrative offers for new gigs, insiders say. “But for Martha and Giada, this is still a win because…

HOLY cow! Milk looks white because calcium, proteins and globs of fat refract light in a way similar to snow. A yellow tint in your moo juice is caused by the critter’s diet. PAUL NEWMAN detested his role as a Greek silversmith in 1954’s religious-themed The Silver Chalice, calling the flick “the worst film to be made in the entirety of the 1950s.” He apologized for doing it. A FLOCK of seven savvy sheep broke out of a Paterson, N.J., slaughterhouse just before their date with death — and found a new home at a local animal sanctuary. They were caught trying to enter a local doughnut shop! ANDREW JACKSON, the face of the $20 bill, was the first U.S. president to be targeted by an assassin. He was confronted…