Globe November 7, 2016

SHOE-IN Trust Sex and the City style guru SARAH JESSICA PARKER to literally be one step ahead of selfie trends — by snapping her footwear! HOT WHEELS Austin Powers star VERNE TROYER is all tricked out for football season in his University of Michigan scooter! BALD AIN’T BEAUTIFUL If only chrome dome TED DANSON was as dedicated to the Hair Club for Men as he is to working out at Gold’s Gym! YOU’RE SO VEIN One thing’s for sure: All that “medical marijuana” hasn’t benefited WILLIE NELSON’s withered, ropey arms! PUFF PIECE You know something has gone wrong with KATE HUDSON’s face when you don’t even notice her miles of cleavage! PARTY’S OVER Yikes! Former Party of Five sex-bomb JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT, out Halloween shopping, turned a pumpkin patch into…

GLOBE WORLD EXCLUSIVE SONGBIRD Carrie Underwood has issued a tough ultimatum to her two-fisted, hockey hunk hubby Mike Fisher, an insider claims — she’ll have another baby ONLY if he quits and becomes a stay-at-home dad! And the 33-year-old blonde’s stance may not sit well with macho Mike, 36, captain of the NHL’s Nashville Predators, who planned to have a pack of young’uns with the Blown Away singer. “Carrie and Mike have been at each other’s throats for ages over when to bring another little one into their family. Mike is at wit’s end,” says a source. “When he and Carrie married, they both agreed on four kids! But neither is getting any younger … Carrie seems more interested in touring and recording.” After giving birth to Isaiah in February…

WILLIAM Shatner’s bizarre on-air meltdown on a recent TV chat show has the actor’s friends worried — and some fear the Star Trek icon is losing his mind to brain-ravaging dementia! “Bill’s latest behavior has his loved ones petrified that his mind is going,” says a source. “He hasn’t been himself in recent months. He has wild mood swings. One minute Bill can be totally calm and happy and a few minutes later, he’s shouting and ranting about some random topic. “Some close to him are worried Bill could be succumbing to dementia.” Alarm bells for Star Trek’s legendary Capt. James T. Kirk began clanging after he flew into an onair rant during an early October appearance on the TV chat show Good Morning Britain. The 85-year-old star, who was…

TRAGIC Whitney Houston and her troubled daughter, Bobbi Kristina Brown, must be exhumed for new autopsies as part of a chilling investigation to prove they BOTH were murdered, legal experts say. Whitney’s family is demanding a new police probe into the singer’s 2012 death in a Beverly Hills hotel as Bobbi Kristina’s accused killer Nick Gordon is put in the crosshairs. A notoriously hot-tempered Romeo, Gordon was recently found responsible for Bobbi Kristina’s 2015 death in a Georgia Superior Court civil case. Shockingly, the 26-year-old hunk was also on hand for Whitney’s passing — and there are shocking similarities between the two women’s fifinal minutes! Both mother and daughter were found badly bruised and — either dead or comatose — in bathtubs. Both had drugs in their systems when they…

BRITAIN’S disgraced Nazi-loving Duke of Windsor — who abdicated the throne in a sex scandal — fathered a love child with a French beauty and hid his secret son from the world! That’s the explosive claim of French hotel executive Francois Graftieaux, who insists bisexual King Edward VIII is his grandfather! In his shocking biography, The Man Who Should Have Been King, Francois claims Edward, who renounced the throne in 1936, knocked up his grandma Marie-Leonie Graftieaux during a 1912 visit to Paris. He’s so determined to prove he and his dad, Pierre-Edouard, are related to Britain’s rulers, he’s written Queen Elizabeth demanding DNA samples from the royal family, including Prince Charles and his sons William and Harry! “I’m not asking for their love nor their money, nor indeed any…

KILLER veterinarian Kristen Lindsey set animal lovers howling with rage after she skewered her neighbor’s kitty cat with her bow and arrow — and then proudly showed off her gruesome trophy on Facebook! Along with the photo, the Houston-area beauty boastfully posted the message: “My first bow kill … lol. The only good feral tomcat is one with an arrow through its head. “Vet of the year award … gladly accepted.” But instead of an award, her post got the fur flying with critter lovers, and she was banned for a year from working as a vet by the Texas Board of Veterinary Medical Examiners! And after the 33-yearold’s suspension, she’ll be on probation for another four years. Kristen’s first mistake was thinking the putty tat was wild — when…