Table of contents for May 29, 2023 in Globe

CHIP SHOT CHRIS NOTH, Sex and the City’s Mr. Big, is in danger of going from silver fox to silver ox if he doesn’t lay off the junk food! DIGGING IN Ted Lasso’s JASON SUDEIKIS takes a break from picking on baby mama ex OLIVIA WILDE in court — and targets his nose instead! SUN OF A GUN Spice Girl GERI HORNER sloppily slathers on sunscreen at the shore in Miami ANCIENT FOSSIL Cackling KATE CAPSHAW is unrecognizable as the retired Indiana Jones actress plays tourist in Barcelona HIDING THE TOOTH Culture Club’s colorful frontman BOY GEORGE has changed his choppers — but his massive mouth makeover is blindingly white ANY WITCH WAY Harry Potter’s EMMA THOMPSON doesn’t need magic to see her future looks mighty wrinkled…

CARRIE FISHER’s only child, Billie Lourd, is locked in a bitter family feud, charging her kin made a coldhearted cash grab following the Star Wars beauty’s mysterious death in 2016. That’s why 30-year-old Billie barred her uncle Todd Fisher, 65, and aunts Joely Fisher, 55, and Tricia Leigh Fisher, 54, from attending the May 4 induction onto the Hollywood Walk of Fame of her mom, who became a film icon for her portrayal of Princess Leia. The family cried foul, with Joely and Tricia issuing a statement saying, “For some bizarre, misguided reason our niece has chosen not to include us in this epic moment in our sister’s career. “This is something Carrie would have definitely wanted her siblings to be present for. The fact that her only brother and…

AILING Celine Dion is heartbroken her lifechanging health woes forced her to miss the premiere of her first big film acting role — but sources say the gutsy songbird is determined that her career will go on! The 55-year-old My Heart Will Go On singer — who suffers from a crippling disease — was forced to skip the May 4 New York premiere of the rom-com Love Again and after-party with the film’s stars Priyanka Chopra and Sam Heughan. “It was a cruel blow that Celine’s health wouldn’t allow her to join her castmates,” spills a source. “Because the movie was filmed during the pandemic, Celine shot her scenes in front of a green screen and was not in the same room with her co-stars. “They vowed to finally meet…

TORI BARFED DURING DISASTER CIBRIAN DATE TORI SPELLING spills the beans about a disastrous first — and last — date with EDDIE CIBRIAN that literally made her lose her appetite! Back in her 20s, the Beverly Hills, 90210 alum says, “We go to sit down and I’m looking at the menu, nervous, and then he says, ‘I’m not really hungry. You’re not hungry, are you?’ So, I was like, a young girl, this hot young actor guy. I was like, ‘Okay, sure.’ And he’s like, ‘Let’s just get drinks.’ I was like, ‘Okay.’ Guess how that played out? I ended up getting wasted. So wasted that I went to go to the bathroom and walked into the kitchen by mistake and threw up in the back of the kitchen.” After,…

TROUBLED pop tart Britney Spears is penning an explosive tell-all memoir and American Horror Story producer Ryan Murphy is itchin’ to film a documentary about the terrors she endured during her 13-year conservatorship. Ryan, who worked with the singer when she appeared on his TV series Glee, is “fascinated by the Britney saga,” says a source. “He has not reached out directly but when Britney’s memoir is out, he’s thinking of exploring the option.” Britney’s bio, which was due in January, has hit a snag, according to insiders, who say two A-listers are objecting to her tales about them.…

TAYLOR SWIFT’s quickie rebound with Brit rocker Matty Healy has concerned friends and family fearing she needs to do some serious solo soul-searching instead of constantly running from man to man, spies say! Problem is the 33-year-old You Belong with Me songbird “just can’t be alone” since splitting from English actor Joe Alwyn a few weeks ago after six years together, says a source. “Right after Joe started pulling away, Taylor was freaking out and quietly scouring around to line up potential new suitors,” dishes an insider. “And once things finally ended, her manhunt went into overdrive, with a number of candidates and not just Matty.” While some sources chalk up the new romance as partly PR, Taylor had Matty, 34, in tow when she returned to her Nashville home…

NEWLY crowned King Charles has wielded his power to show HE is the star of the royal family — and publicity-obsessed renegades Prince Harry and Meghan are pathetic losers, according to well-placed palace officials. “The royal gloves are off,” charges a senior courtier. “His Majesty is done with the drama that’s ripped the family apart and threatened the monarchy since the Duke and Duchess of Sussex quit and moved to America two years ago. “He has taken control and is showing his rebel son and daughter-in-law who’s boss!” The historic May 6 coronation of the 74-year-old monarch was barely over before he fired the first salvo across the Sussexes’ bow — making a surprise appearance on American Idol, with his wife, Queen Camilla, 75! Katy Perry, 38, and Lionel Richie,…

ANGUISHED actress Christina Applegate is opening up on the nightmare of living with crippling multiple sclerosis. “It f**king sucks,” she says. “It’s never a good day. You just have sh*tty days.” Even simple acts like taking a shower are torturous. “You can fall, you can slip, your legs can buckle,” she explains. “Especially because I have a glass shower. It’s frightening to me to get in there.” She can’t walk down stairs or carry things due to the incurable nervous system condition. The 51-year-old Dead to Me star also admits she can’t stand to watch the show because it makes her self-conscious about her appearance. “I don’t look like myself anymore, obviously,” says the mom of 12-year-old daughter Sadie. “And it’s really, really hard for me because so much of my…

UH-OH! Singing legend DIANA ROSS is supremely ticked off after Motown motormouth SMOKEY ROBINSON told the world about their adulterous 1980s affair, our spies tattle. Now Diana, 79, is basically telling Smokey, 83, to Stop in the Name of Love — ’cause she was stepping out with the cad while he was still married to her pal CLAUDETTE ROGERS! Diana, who was single at the time, broke it off because she didn’t want to hurt Claudette, who is still her friend today. Of course, that may all change. Says a spy, “Diana told Smokey he’s had enough fame in his life without having to draw attention to himself by telling secrets from 40 years ago!”…

SMACKED with a ton of flak for her funky frozen face, defiant Meg Ryan is hitting back, insisting she loves the way her kisser looks and won’t let mean trolls beat her down. The 61-year-old Sleepless in Seattle babe made a rare public appearance on May 12 to support actor pal Michael J. Fox at the Big Apple screening of his new documentary. Fans and critics were stunned by Meg’s wrinkle-free face, with many babbling she’s gone overboard with plastic surgery — and was unrecognizable. But sources say the divorced mom of two, who lives a quiet life away from the cameras in Montecito, Calif., is taking it in stride and courageously batting away the belittling banter like a trouper. “Meg learned many years ago to take no notice of…

EX-CON Zion Teasley was busted for ambushing Lauren Heike — and cutting her to ribbons — just one week after cops say cameras caught the coward sprinting away from where the tragic beauty’s body was found near an Arizona hiking trail! Days after Lauren’s bloody corpse was discovered, Teasley, 22, was nabbed at his Phoenix apartment, which was less than a mile from the murder scene. Authorities say they tracked down Teasley after he left behind incriminating DNA evidence on the doomed gal’s shoe — and chilling footage showing a lone figure clad in dark clothing running along the desert path where the 29-year-old victim was a regular fixture helped provide key evidence. Lauren recently moved to the area from Washington state. Officials say the brutalized blonde was viciously stabbed…

POPULAR female impersonator Shangela — one of the cross-dressing contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race — raped a male production assistant in 2020, according to a recently filed civil suit. Daniel McGarrigle, who worked on the reality regular’s We’re Here, charges the dress-wearing heel, whose legal name is Darius Jeremy Pierce, launched the attack after the HBO hit’s first-season wrap party. McGarrigle, 39, claims the former Dancing with the Stars hopeful plied him with booze before luring him to a hotel room under the guise of helping the TV cross-dresser pack for a morning flight. The accuser says after he fell ill, the makeup-wearing monster urged him to lie down. The graphic lawsuit claims McGarrigle passed out and awoke to find “Pierce on the lower half of his body, rubbing his penis…

ACTOR Stanley Tucci found an effective way to lose weight — but it’s not something he’d recommend! The 62-year-old Citadel star — who’s become a surprising sex symbol — reveals he dropped 35 pounds while fighting oral cancer a few years back. “I couldn’t eat,” Stanley says. “I had a feeding tube for six months and everything tasted like you know what and smelled like you know what. “It took months and months and months for me to finally be able to eat again and then taste properly again.” Tucci, who tragically lost his first wife, Kate, to cancer in 2009, admits being “absolutely terrified” by his 2017 diagnosis. “My late wife and I, we traveled all over the world trying to find a cure for her,” he recalls. “So…

LEGENDARY Willie Nelson may have just turned 90, but the country crooner has still got plenty of mojo in the tank — and his wife of 32 years, Annie D’Angelo, boasts he’s the sexiest 90-year-old on the planet! Sources say the Crazy singer and dad of seven has eased up on his notorious weed puffin’ in recent times, and that’s put a whole new spring in his step with Annie, 66. “Sure, Willie has to take naps, but that’s about all that’s slowed down,” tattles a source. “He’s as much a man as ever and he and Annie have an extremely active love life. He loves to brag to friends about it and makes her blush when he boasts about how sexy she still is. But you can tell she…

LOVE-HUNGRY Top Gun hunk Tom Cruise has fallen hard for sexy Latin singer Shakira — and insiders say he’s hearing wedding bells after just a few dates with the Colombian hottie! The pair were seen flirting up a storm while attending the Miami Grand Prix on May 7, and insiders say the 60-year-old tomcat is longing for a lasting relationship after a slew of shattered short-term romances. The father of three — with ex-wives Katie Holmes and Nicole Kidman — is desperate to start another family before it’s too late, say sources. But Shakira, 46, is being far more cautious — and doesn’t want a rebound romance after being blindsided by her cheating baby daddy, soccer star Gerard Piqué, 36, father of her kids, Milan, 10, and Sasha, 8, late…

KING CHARLES’ troublemaking sex creep brother Prince Andrew and rogue son Harry have been erased from the royal family! Newly released royal portraits following the glitzy May 6 coronation of Charles and his wife, Camilla, reveal two prominent family members missing — Andrew, 63, who scandalized the monarchy by his raunchy partying with the late pedophile Jeffrey Epstein and his young harem girls, and Harry, 38, who ditched royal duties and trashed the family with ambitious wife Meghan. In addition to photos of Charles and Camilla in their regalia, photographer Hugo Burnand released a group shot of all the senior royal members including Prince William and Princess Kate; Princess Anne and Vice Admiral Sir Tim Laurence; the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester; Prince Edward and Sophie, Duchess of Edinburgh; and Princess Alexandra.…

A YEAR after his tragic death at age 67, the cause of Goodfellas star Ray Liotta’s sudden death while filming in the Dominican Republic has been released — heart failure and fluid in his lungs. Medical officials blame Ray’s death in his sleep on pulmonary edema, breathing problems and acute heart failure. The Field of Dreams actor left behind daughter Karsen, 24, and fiancée Jacy Nittolo, who described him as “the most beautiful person inside and out that I’ve ever known and even that is an understatement.”…

It’s been “three months of laughter, kisses, banter, love and unalloyed goofiness,” gushes supermodel PAULINA PORIZKOVA, 58, who has a sizzling new romance with Will & Grace producer JEFF GREENSTEIN. You know it’s serious ’cause they’ve both deleted dating apps from their phones! After three miscarriages, Hunger Games star ALEXANDER LUDWIG, 31, and jewelry designer wife LAUREN, 31, welcomed daughter LENI, born four weeks early. Dancing with the Stars pro alum LINDSAY ARNOLD, 29, and her husband, SAMUEL LIGHTNER CUSICK, welcomed their second baby girl. The tiny dancer joins big sis SAGE, 2. ESPN sports analyst PAT McAFEE, 36, and wife SAMANTHA are cheering for their first lil sport, a daughter. KHLOÉ KARDASHIAN, 38, finally revealed the secret name of her second baby with her ex-fiancé, NBA star TRISTAN THOMPSON,…

VAIN Pat Sajak is so freaked over his droopy tattletale turkey neck, sources say the aging Wheel of Fortune host is looking for a doc to fix it! Unlike some squeamish Hollywood oldsters, the 76-year-old game master has no qualms keeping up with the cool kids by booking an op at the surgeon’s office, according to spies who say Sajak is fixated on looking young! “Pat’s closing in on 77 in October and barely has a line on his face, aside from some crow’s feet,” blabs an insider. “He’s obsessed with looking young, but one area that he hasn’t been able to fix with lasers or injectables is his turkey neck. “He wears collared shirts and gets them as high as possible to hide his neck, but it’s not really…

A 30-YEAR-OLD man claims he’s the love child of billionaire music mogul Jay-Z and charges the fat-cat has used his wealth and power to control the legal system and dodge taking a paternity test — for ten years! The 53-year-old rapper’s lawyers deny the claims of Rymir Satterthwaite, who insists he was conceived during a brief affair between then 22-year-old Jay-Z and his late mom, Wanda, a 16-year-old high schooler, in the early 1990s. Jay-Z admits the romance, but has reportedly refused to take a paternity test. After the case was rejected by New Jersey’s Supreme Court, Rymir asked the lower Appellate Court to unseal the claim he filed when he was 21, saying: “This is not going to be over until justice is served. I won’t stop fighting for…

SASSY cougar Martha Stewart says it’s the cat’s meow to be a “bona fide sex symbol” at 81! “It’s a good example for others, actually,” boasts the domestic diva. “I’m a teacher. I’m trying to teach others that you can look great. There’s no reason to slump around.” Martha has attracted flattering comments from online fans for her thirst trap selfies — ever since puckering up for a sultry pool snapshot in July 2020. The senior sexpot even recently posed in little more than an apron to mug for a coffee company! The former model reveals she’s “not afraid” of aging — and will “absolutely” share more photos of herself on social media! The glam grandma didn’t elaborate on her plans but promises “good stuff” is coming!…

A NEW Fartgate stink has exploded on The View after co-host Sunny Hostin accused lead panelist Whoopi Goldberg of being the show’s mysterious gasbag! Hostin, 54, explains the gabfest’s gals have recently been provided with coasters for their cups because they are supposedly making the rude sounds viewers thought were fanny belches. But Sunny insists the coasters are a cover-up and Whoopi is behind the noise. She accuses the 67-year-old blowhard of being the source of the toots, saying the Oscar-winning funnygal “actually passes the most gas on set.” She adds Whoopi even admitted being a windbag and after one explosion told her co-hosts, “Sorry y’all. That was me.” Sunny says she “just took her at her word” that Whoopi was behind the stink, but “it just turned into this…

DISGRACED director and child rapist Roman Polanski’s wife, Emmanuelle Seigner, is working hard to get the threat of a long jail sentence lifted so her pervert hubby can return to the U.S. after 45 years of self-imposed exile in Paris — by insisting time has healed all wounds. But when it comes to the law — and basic morality — it simply doesn’t work like that. Pedophile Polanski, then 43, plied 13-year-old Samantha Gailey with champagne and drugs, then raped her in 1977. He pleaded guilty to a lesser crime in a deal that would get him probation instead of jail time over the 42 days he’d already served during a psych evaluation. But when he learned the judge planned to toss the deal and jail him for 50 years,…

AMERICA’S first post office was established in a Boston saloon owned by Richard Fairbanks in 1639 — a whopping 136 years before the U.S. Postal Service was created. CHICKENS and ostriches are the closest living relatives to the mighty Tyrannosaurus rex! A 2008 molecular inspection of the dinosaurs’ proteins shows the birds much more closely matched than other reptiles, including the alligator! HOLLYWOOD legend Bette Davis detested rival actress Joan Crawford — the face of Pepsi Cola — so much she had a Coke machine installed in her dressing room! THE Grand Canyon is bigger than Rhode Island — at 227 miles long and 18 miles wide — and is so large it actually makes its own weather! TOOTH enamel is the hardest part of the human body, even stronger…