Table of contents for Sept/Oct 2024 in Fairlady

I once read an absolutely excellent tip by the brilliant British writer A. A. Gill about how to avoid being stuck with someone you really don’t want to speak to at a party. And, inspired by Pnina Fenster’s story on page 36, about how to navigate tricky social situations with grace, I will share it with you now. I hope you appreciate the sacrifice, because it also means I will never be able to use it again. The truth is, I think I may have mentioned it before, but a refresher is always a good idea because spring is here and party season will soon be in full swing again. Preparation is vital. Here it is: As soon as you can, get two drinks, one in each hand. If someone…

A friend embarrasses you publicly with stories of things you did in the past You may have smiled, laughed and tried to change the subject the first few times this happened. But if a friend continues to tell a story that embarrasses you, take gentle but definite action. ‘To begin with, understand that this often has more to do with them than you,’ advises body language expert Blanca Cobb. ‘Take a deep breath to help control your emotions. Then you can stop or shorten the conversation by not participating.’ It’s unlikely this is deliberately done to upset you, so maintain your poise, keep calm and then make a time to talk. Explain your reaction and ask, ‘Do you realise how this makes me feel?’ You’ve forgotten someone’s name Some experts…

CANDICE POTGIETER The Unlimited Child theunlimitedchild.org A survey by the Thrive by Five Index found that 65% of South African children aged 4 to 5 in early learning programmes are failing to thrive, highlighting the urgent need for improved early childhood development (ECD) interventions. Candice, the CEO of The Unlimited Child, addresses this issue by empowering women and improving early education. ‘With so many communities lacking quality ECD centres, we knew that we could unlock the potential in these existing facilities to “unlimit” children’s dreams,’ she says. By training ECD practitioners and supporting ECD centres, the organisation empowers women to run viable micro-enterprises and ensure children in their care are school-ready. Started by the for-profit company The Unlimited under founder Iain Buchan, The Unlimited Child has grown significantly since Candice…

‘With food, you don't have to buy an airline ticket or don a backpack; the magic of the romantic is there, right beside the everyday, for you to bring into your kitchen.’ MERINGUE AND ROSE CAKE WITH SUMMER BERRIES Serves 12 With its creamy white tiers and scattering of rose petals, this is a great wedding dress of a cake – but its extravagant appearance belies its simplicity. It really is a case of maximum visual impact for minimum effort: a perfect combination of a pretty English garden and the magic of the Arabian Nights. Make the cake a day ahead, as the meringue needs to dry out. ROSE PETALS (crystallised or not, as you prefer) • petals from 2 fragrant roses• 2 egg whites, beaten very lightly (optional)• sifted…

I first fell in love with dikkoppe on the Morning Walk. (I think the Bird-Renaming Police have now changed their name to ‘thick-knees’, which is obviously just so ridiculous that we will not entertain it any further). There was just something so valiant and silly about them – all huge eyes, skinny legs and knock-knees, standing in a line staring fixedly at the rising sun, wind ruffling their speckled feathers, not a thought troubling their tiny heads. Later, we found a breeding pair on the field behind our house, or rather they found us: whenever we got too close to their nest (which was on the ground – I mean, duh), one of them would come hurtling towards us, flapping and screeching in the most non terrifying way. I loved…

WINNING LETTER And also… I spent the past week in bed nursing swine flu, or whatever is doing the rounds. I had other plans for the week because my husband was away on a camping trip with colleagues, but there I was with a box of tissues and YouTube to keep me company. I tried not to sink into cute kitten oblivion and so it happened that I came across Olivia Colman reading Eliza Compton’s letter to her husband. (Ed: It’s best to watch this YouTube video before you read on: t.ly/J-Dq7) It brought such wonderful insights! I realised the reason I can’t get my husband to help around the house is because there is just no way a Post-it on his computer screen or the fridge door can stand…

Gilty pleasures Commemorating a special occasion or shopping for a future heirloom? A golden bracelet, necklace or pendant is a good place to start. Shoulder to shoulder Structured or slouchy, bold or neutral; whatever your preference, a well-made leather handbag is an investment piece. Look for one with unique detailing and quality craftsmanship. On spec Yes, they are mainly functional, but spectacles are also a reflection of your style. Choose a pair that really speaks to you. sneakers Sneak preview Sneakers have come a long way, stylewise. These days, they slot seamlessly into any outfit, adding some edge to a dress, skirt or even a corporate look. Quality time You don’t have to wait for retirement to get that swanky watch. Switch up your everyday style with a beautiful timepiece.…

IF you follow news headlines for any length of time, it’s almost impossible not to deduce that the world is going to hell in a handbasket. If the AI apocalypse doesn’t get us, it’ll be another pandemic, or climate change, or World War III, or starvation due to too many people and not enough resources. People are throwing soup at priceless artworks and blocking traffic in the name of ‘extinction rebellion’, and the World Economic Forum thinks that eating insects is a good way to solve a (possible) impending food crisis. Cockroach canapé, anyone? But these dire doomsday predictions are not the full picture. The story of humanity is one of increasing ingenuity, innovation and prosperity – and there is little to indicate that this will not continue to be…

Project Dyad JESSIKA BALZER START-UP COSTS: ‘The biggest outlay was on machinery and equipment, and the time spent on developing new ideas. But a lot of money is saved by wearing many hats and doing a lot of things yourself.’ CURRENT TURNOVER: ‘We’ve had steady growth. Our turnover has grown by 100% every year in the past few years, and we got the chance to grow our team slowly. AT Project Dyad, design meets community under the creative direction of Jessika Balzer, who is originally from Germany but has made Cape Town her home. Project Dyad makes leather bags and accessories that blend contemporary aesthetics with functionality. Tell us a little about yourself. Once I completed my studies in fashion design in Berlin in 2012, I wasn’t sure where to…

Micro-miniskirts, dancing CGI babies, The Biscuit… If you were watching TV in the ’90s, you were most likely a fan of Ally McBeal. This legal comedy-drama had us glued to our TV screens one night a week from 1997 to 2002. (This was before you could binge shows, kids. You know, back in the 1900s.) Despite its relatively brief five-year run, the show cemented itself as a cultural touchstone, earning an impressive 34 Emmy nominations throughout its 112-episode tenure. Notably, three of these nominations were for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series, honouring the incomparable portrayal of its titular character by Calista Flockhart. Born on 11 November 1964 in Freeport, Illinois, Calista Kay Flockhart grew up in a close-knit family that instilled in her the values of hard work…

Margie Orford needs little introduction. The internationally acclaimed writer and award-winning journalist earned the title of the queen of South African crime thrillers with her gripping Clare Hart series – about a journalist and profiler navigating the complexities of crime and justice in Cape Town. Readers worldwide fell in love with her flawed yet relatable heroine – her novels have been translated into 10 languages. But Margie is not just about crime fiction. She’s also a prolific non-fiction writer, contributing thought-provoking essays and articles to international publications. Her work dives deep into themes like violence, human rights and trauma, a reflection of her commitment to social justice. With degrees in literature and philosophy, plus prestigious fellowships and teaching stints at various universities, Margie’s academic prowess is just as impressive as…

SELANEI DOORASAMY Vestara vestara.co.za ❛Through Vestara, we’re not just transforming careers but also shaping a future where women can excel on their own terms,’ Selanei says. Inspired by her own journey navigating professional challenges, she founded this platform that is dedicated to connecting women with remote work opportunities as virtual assistants. Established in November 2023, Vestara swiftly gained traction, evolving from a start-up into a thriving enterprise within just six months. Selanei’s commitment to empowering women is evident in Vestara’s core mission: to provide remote work opportunities that enable women to work from home or anywhere with an internet connection. Looking ahead, she envisions Vestara as a beacon of empowerment for women globally. ‘Success for me in the next three years means a thriving community of empowered women. It’s about…

PREP + COOKING TIME: 30 minutes PREP + COOKING TIME: 45 minutes GREEK PORK SKEWERS WITH CRUSHED WHITE BEANS SERVES 4 • 60 ml (¼ cup) extra-virgin olive oil• 2 medium onions, sliced thinly• 2 garlic cloves, sliced thinly• 250 ml (1 cup) dry white wine• 2 x 400g tins white beans, drained and rinsed• 500 ml (2 cups) chicken stock• 60 ml (¼ cup) lemon juice• 2 handfuls of oregano leaves, chopped coarsely• 10 ml (2 tsp) finely grated lemon rind• 4 garlic cloves, extra, halved• 60 ml (¼ cup) red wine vinegar• 700 g pork fillet, sliced into 3cm cubes• a handful of flat-leaf parsley, leaves picked• lemon wedges, to serve ➊ Heat 20ml (4 tsp) of the olive oil in a saucepan over medium heat. Add onion…

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‘You complete me.’ Remember that line from Jerry Maguire? Oh, how we swooned at the very notion: that Renée Zellweger (and her admittedly adorable bespectacled child) were the missing Lego pieces in Tom Cruise’s life. Twenty-eight years on (yes, that’s how long it’s been since that movie came out – deep breath), experts agree that that kind of declaration should be a pretty obvious red flag. ‘When we channel all our intimate needs into one person,’ psychotherapist Esther Perel writes, ‘we actually stand to make the relationship more vulnerable.’ And yet the romantic ideal of a soulmate persists: that one relationship that ticks all the boxes. We have come to expect that finding The One will be a one-stop shop: for a confidant, a best friend, a co-parent, a lover,…

‘HI, my darling. I’ve washed my hair and I’ve packed an overnight bag; I’m not sure why, but I’m coming to spend the night with you,’ Deb says in her ever-cheerful voice. It is 2 July 2008. My friend Dan and I have spent the day hiking in Oranjekloof, in absolute wonder at all the rainbows that were visible above Table Mountain’s peaks. I wondered whether those rainbows held some hope for the sadness I was feeling. That evening, Deb and I choose mint tea over red wine, as if performing some unconscious ritual. Through the high arched window of my sanctuary overlooking Oranjekloof, we watch the Milky Way like two wise mothers waiting for a sign. Oh, holy night. I answer a call from an unknown number on my…

Unless you’re a runner yourself, you probably won’t remember the Czech long-distance runner Emil Zátopek. Voted the Best Runner of All Time by Runner’s World, Zátopek was the first to run 10000 metres in under 29 minutes, and to run 22km in under 1 hour. At the very last minute during the 1952 Olympics, he decided to compete in the marathon for the first time. He ran alongside the reigning champion for the first 15km, then turned to him and asked him, conversationally, what he thought of the race so far. The champion, probably trying to unsettle him, responded that it was ‘quite slow’. So Zátopek accelerated, going on to win the race and break the world record. Called ‘the Czech Locomotive’ because of his weird running style (he moved…

FynArts Festival Hermanus is best known for the Whale Festival, but did you know that the town also hosts the FynArts Festival in June every year? It is both an arts festival and a winter school, and offers everything from recitals to wine tastings. In 2023, at the launch concert for the ticket sales of the Fynarts Festival, the Cape Town Philharmonic Orchestra performed in the Old Harbour at sunset. ‘As they struck up the first note, a whole family of dolphins danced in the water alongside the audience,’ says festival director Mary Faure. ‘It was absolute magic.’ We love the art-of-living workshops, which include things like bookmaking, memoir writing, cellphone photography and kintsugi. Strauss & Co Fine Art Auctioneers held a Valuation Day at The Marine hotel, where you…

GLYNN MASHONGA Globescope globescope.co.za Growing up in Mitchells Plain, Glynn made a promise to herself that one day she would address the pervasive safety concerns in her community. ‘The purpose in setting up Globescope was to find solutions to make life safer for families and businesses.’ Globescope, which Glynn established in 2005, now offers a comprehensive portfolio of security services, and is setting benchmarks in the industry with its pricing and service excellence. ‘We deliver state-of-the-art security and surveillance solutions designed to ensure your peace of mind.’ Making inroads into the male dominated security industry has been one of the biggest hurdles. ‘A great deal of scrutiny was placed on me, and I had to constantly prove my capabilities. With sheer tenacity, I was able to make these inroads as…

We’re bringing together 80 key players in the beauty industry, including influencers, our top magazine editors – FAIRLADY editor Suzy Brokensha, TRUELOVE editor Mbali Soga and SARIE editor Michélle van Breda – and YOU! We’ll be tackling skin concerns and exploring the latest trends in beauty and skincare, all while offering revolutionary, innovative solutions. This exclusive event has a limited number of tickets available to give every attendee the very best experience. NIVEA understands the challenges of stubborn dark marks and uneven skin tone that impact self-esteem. That’s why NIVEA Luminous630 is here to empower women and help them reclaim their confidence to live their luminous lives! Don’t miss out on this opportunity to unlock the secret to glowing, even-toned skin with NIVEA’s Luminous630 range! Meet our MC Ayanda Thabethe…

A couple of sandwiches short of a picnic How many bottles of wine is appropriate for a picnic? We’re so glad you asked! According to @JoeFattorini, who offers a fabulous #winefactoftheday on Instagram, six bottles should be fine. Each. Six bottles Each. That was the view of The Picnic Society, formed in 1801 by a group of French aristocrats living in London after escaping the Revolution. The picnics they held were mainly indoors and, Joe says, involved ‘a lot of carousing’. Oh, go on. There is nothing we don’t love about this story. And remember, six. ROSITA CHIQUITA! This season’s hot new take on the negroni, the Rosita cocktail substitutes tequila for gin, and we love it: bittersweet, heady and absolutely coma-inducing, it’s a bit like falling in love. Stir…

Cryptic crosswords Doodle spot ACROSS 1. A pawnbroker once called Eme (5) 4. Scull the boat back to the vessel and take part in service (7) 8. Need dream to be shattered as one wandered aimlessly around (9) 9. Vehicle that starts cornering as required (3) 10. It is not sharp, neither is it synthetic (7) 12. A figure in Trafalgar Square, or one in half of the capital (4) 14. Worked, with wool, tent kid may have fashioned (7) 17. Be in want when turned out of Eden (4) 18. Is making a home for the gents in the confusion (7) 20. Constrictor found in a dinghy that’s not been finished (3) 21. Shows how verdant it is through lack of experience (9) 23. The essential part might melt with no end…

Winners! Congrats to our WINNERS Mhondoro competition Marzanne de Jager, Lynnwood Glen MegaXword 193 Adell Olivier, Stellenridge Brainteaser 192 Paul Sierra, George Johanna van Wyngaard, Piet Retief Beth White, Port Elizabeth HOW TO ENTER MEGAXWORD & BRAINTEASER The MegaXword and Brainteaser crossword competitions close on 17 October 2024. Scan or photograph your completed crossword and email it to puzzles@fairlady.com with MegaXword 195 or Brainteaser 194 in the subject line, and provide your name, residential or postal address, email address and phone number. Digital copies of the crosswords are allowed, but photocopies are not allowed. Delivery of prizes may take up to six weeks after notification. STANDARD TERMS AND CONDITIONS 1. Competitions and giveaways are open to permanent residents of South Africa over the age of 18. 2. Staff members of the…