Table of contents for 19 January 2023 in Chat

Welcome to this week's Chat… It's the time of year when lots of us are on diets, and Tara's story (p10) reminds me that it's not as simple as it seems. She lost an incredible 12st but has been left with 3st I of loose skin. She says she wouldn't change a thing, though, and rightly so. Well done to Tara for changing her life! An inspiration for anyone who is battling the scales. Hope this week's a good ‘un! PS If you're entering the puzzles online, this is the link to use: comps.lifedeathprizes.com/puzzles…

Bouncing my smiling greatgranddaughter on my knee, I sang to Baby Shark. ‘Grandma Shark doo doo do doo do do.’ Star, then 10 months, giggled, her blue eyes lit up. Just then, I heard the door. ‘How's my girl?’ my partner David, then 59, cooed, back home from his postie job. Star reached her arms up for a cuddle. It was February 2020, and Star had recently come to live with us. Her mum, our granddaughter Frankie, then 18, was having a tricky time and we were pleased to help. Frankie had lived with us once too, as a teenager. I'd taught her to cook her fave Sunday roast, biscuits and buns. Frankie fell pregnant at 17, and Star was born in May 2019. The light of our family. Only,…

Night shift misery Q I've started night shifts. I drink coffee to stay awake, then wine to get to sleep, but I'm still tired! Any tips? Nina, Dumbarton A Shift work can mess with your sleep patterns, leading to tiredness and even mental and physical health problems after a time. Coffee or caffeine-containing energy drinks might be useful for an occasional boost but best not to rely on them regularly, as you could crash when the effects wear off, and they can stop you sleeping when your shift is over. Alcohol is best avoided for sleeping as although it helps get you off to sleep, you're likely to wake early and have poorer sleep overall. Try to keep fit with regular exercise, work in a bright light, take regular breaks…

1 Get your vaccines While being vaccinated may not stop you from getting the infection, the partial immunity will minimise the chances of a severe infection. If you have asthma, you're entitled to a free flu jab, which you can book at your GP surgery or local pharmacy. 2 Avoid crowds ‘More people means more potential risk of passing on infections,’ says Dr Unnati Desai, GP national lead at Nuffield Health. If you know that someone is unwell – for example in your household or at work – keep your distance from them. Similarly, if friends or family are smokers, avoid heading outside with them or remove yourself from the room in which they're smoking. 3 Ventilate your home Indoor air pollutants during the colder months can also trigger flare-ups, such…

Top tip Swap the mangetout for any fresh veg – this recipe is super adaptable. FULL MEAL COST £4.61 INCLUDING ENERGY £4.81 Stir-fried pepper chicken with mangetout Up your stir-fry game with hot and spicy Sichuan SERVES 4 PREP 10 MINS COOK 10 MINS 320g pack chicken mini breast fillets 2tsp light soy sauce 1/4tsp freshly ground black pepper 2tsp cornflour 2tbsp vegetable oil 1 red, yellow or orange pepper, cored and cut into 2cm thin strips 75g mangetout, trimmed 1tbsp Sichuan-style hot and spicy stir fry sauce (we used Lee Kum Kee) Fine egg noodles, to serve 1 Cut each chicken fillet into two or three pieces and place in a bowl. Add the soy sauce, pepper and cornflour. 2 Mix well until the chicken is coated in the…

Settling myself down for the night, I began to look forward to the next day. It was December 2018, and my daughter Sophie was due to come home for a visit the following day. We also had a skiing trip lined up with her and her brother Gregor, then 18, for January. I relished the chance to spend time with her. Sophie was an outdoorsy girl. We'd always loved walking in the Lake District, where I lived. She'd studied to become a nurse after some volunteering work with orphans in Kenya. Was now nursing at a hospital in Edinburgh. She had separated from her husband three months earlier. Just after 7pm, a message appeared on the family WhatsApp group – it was from Sophie. Something about it just didn't sit…

17 Ink Legend Tattoo Eyeliner, £4.50, Boots This is one of the most long-wearing eyeliners we've ever tried, for any price-it's just a bonus that it's so affordable! It's the perfect weapon for creating the ultimate retro cat-eye flick. Barry M Gelly Nail Paint & UV Gel Remover, £2.99, barrym.com If you're guilty of picking off your gel manicure after a few weeks, this at-home solution will end that habit. Just be sure to leave it on for long enough, and don't scrape your nails too harshly.…

When Samantha, then 42, and John Jones, 52, decided to leave their sleepy Somerset village for a new life in Malaysia in 2008, they were expecting to step into paradise. Samantha, a former insurance clerk, originally met John at a fire service charity bash. John, a retired fire service chief, was so taken by her that he left his then-wife and children to be with her. But despite his marriage breakdown, John remained a loving dad and granddad to his two children and four grandchildren. At first settling together in Somerset, the loved-up couple then decided to move to the Malaysian island of Langkawi. They had fallen in love with the island, adored by holidaymakers for its pristine blue waters and white sandy beaches, on a 2002 summer holiday. So,…

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Oil be gone For oil spills on your driveway, sprinkle on a generous amount of cat litter. After a few hours, it can be swept up without any hassle. Alexa Millward, Holywell, Flintshire A pod for peas Don't throw away your plastic washing machine pods container – it makes a perfect mini window box to plant your seeds or bulbs. Some containers are even green! David Anderson, Sunderland, Tyne and Wear Bright idea My kitchen is quite dark, so I applied a strip of battery-operated LED lights under a cupboard. It brightens the corner of my kitchen and saves on electricity! Lucy Hodson, Hoylake, Wirral Got you hooked I always save the clips that you get when buying slippers or boots – they're so useful for hanging up fairy lights!…

Q During sex everything around me just disappears and I see bright bursts of colour. Am I weird? Gem, Chester A You could have sexual synaesthesia. Around 4% of people have a condition called synaesthesia where one kind of sensation triggers another in your brain, for example certain sounds or music cause you to see colours. With sexual synaesthesia, the trigger is sexual arousal or orgasm which might create the appearance of patterns, colours, tastes, smells or the sensation of something touching your skin. People with sexual synaesthesia can also seem to enter a kind of trancelike state during sex where they're completely absorbed and lose track of what's going on around them. This doesn't mean that anything's wrong and there's no need for treatment, in fact one study found…

Slipping from my hand, the glass hit the floor and splintered into pieces. It was December 2008 and I was working behind the bar in a pub. As I bent down to pick up the shards, I felt a butterfly sensation in my tummy. The first kicks of my baby! I was 20 weeks pregnant. Just a week earlier, I'd found out that I was having a girl. I was excited despite knowing I'd be a single mum from the outset. I feared complications as I had type 1 diabetes. But the scan had shown the baby was healthy. As I neared the 28-week mark, though, headaches began to plague me. I was struck down by nausea, vomiting and sciatic pain. My blood pressure soared. ‘Pre-eclampsia,’ the doctor told me.…

L'Oréal Elvive Dream Lengths Saviour Mask, £6.99, Sainsbury's This intensive hair treatment will overhaul unhappy hair. Apply after shampooing, wait for five minutes, then wash out. Hair will look shiny and swishy after just one use. Apothecary Restore Body Wash, £7.50, M&S Swapping your shower gel for something a bit fancier will add a touch of luxe to your everyday routine. Scented with geranium, eucalyptus and lavender, it has a fresh, floral aroma. Sanctuary Spa Wellness Solutions Sleep Mist, £12.50, Boots If you're struggling to drift off, a scented pillow spray can work wonders to calm a busy mind. This is blended with calming jasmine, violet and sandalwood to do just that—spritz onto your bed sheets nightly. Revolution Skincare X Sali Hughes Butterclean Makeup Meltdown Cleansing Balm, £15, revolutionbeauty.com So…

Grimacing with embarrassment, I watched from the sidelines as the other kids ran across the playground. It was September 1991 and age 8,I was already a size 14. The biggest, slowest, I was signed off PE, always the odd one out. I'd always been big, my mum taking me to the GP for the first time when I was 4, concerned about my size. But docs hadn't been able to help, and I grew and grew. School lunch was usually sausage rolls, or pizza and chips, topped off with gravy. And although at home Mum cooked fresh dinners, sweets an occasional treat, I kept getting bigger. By 14,I was 15st, size 18 and struggling with anxiety and depression. School bullies didn't help my self-esteem either. ‘Wide-o!’ they teased. I stopped…

Sitting in the hospital, I tried to ignore the pain in my feet. It was February 2014, and after tripping over an uneven pavement the day before, I was in agony. My feet black and blue. ‘Just keep icing them,’ the nurse said, ushering me out. True-life PATIENT CASEBOOK A single mum to my son Brodie, then 6, with a busy career in recruitment, I tried to ignore the pain. But for months my ankles and feet kept fracturing, and I had severe pain in my back, hips and pelvis. I fought for answers. ‘There's something wrong with me,’ I repeated to the doctor after I'd been suffering from severe pain in my lower back in April 2016. ‘Probably kidney stones,’ he replied, ordering a CT scan. The scan showed…

As the news flashed on my TV screen, I felt a shudder. It was 1992. Two British backpackers had been murdered in Australia. Police suspected a serial killer at large, and there could be many more victims. I tried to put the awful story out of my mind. But at night, visions entered my dreams. I could see what the victims looked like. They'd been stabbed, and I felt their pain. As though I was the victim… I'd spent my life trying to suppress psychic connections. As a child, I was terrified of the dark. I'd hear muffled sounds and shadows flew about the room. ‘You have a wonderful imagination,’ Mum laughed. But it was more than that – it was real. Aged 13, I had my appendix removed. Came…

We're always rowing Q Me and my boyfriend are constantly arguing. We always work things out but we're both so tired of it. Sometimes we have the same argument over and over again. We still want to be together, so what can we do to move our relationship forward? Ivy 33 AShow me a couple who claim they don't argue and I'll show you a pair of fibbers! I think your issue is that you're not arguing effectively. If you're going over the same old ground in every bust up, it means you're not resolving anything. You're not communicating or compromising. That's what needs to change, my love. There will always be disagreements in relationships. But try less yelling, more listening. And that goes for both of you! I hate…

3 ways to… KICK-START YOUR CAREER IN 2023 Stuck in a job rut and struggling to get out of it? Try these expert tips 1 Focus on a skills upgrade Getting new skills or honing existing ones is a priority. Talk to your manager about a personal-development plan and training opportunities – for instance, you could go on a course or take on extra responsibilities that will boost your skills. And for training outside work, check out free online courses at nationalcareers. service.gov.uk. 2 Widen your network ‘It might be a cliché, but sometimes it really is all about who you know,’ explains Victoria McLean, CEO of City CV (citycvcom). ‘You can attend networking events or simply talk to people at work, especially those you don't usually interact with. Find…

13-19 January 2023 Aries 21 March-20 April You'll make a new friend at work who has the same interests as you. Inviting them for a drink will go down well, and you'll be privy to a secret. • Call 0905 817 0690* for more Taurus 21 April-21 May You're clearing out your wardrobe, ready to make a big donation to charity of everything you haven't worn. Blitzing it will make you feel accomplished. • Call 0905 817 0691* for more Gemini 22 May-21 June Plans aren't set in stone. Anything can be changed if you are helping a friend while your ruling planet moves from retrograde into direct motion. • Call 0905 817 0692* for more Cancer 22 June-23 July Someone close reaches out with a problem, but avoid wading…

Q I'd like to try a new face mask – do you have any suggestions under £10? Holly Bryson, Neath, South Wales A Face masks are a great way of treating your skin to a little extra hit of what it needs. If it's dehydrated, that would be hyaluronic acid – it's the ultimate super-hydrator, able to hold 1,000 times its own weight in water. A sheet mask is the ideal way to use it — PS… Skin Hyaluronic Sheet Mask, £1.30, Primark, is a brilliant bargain. If your complexion is looking dull, using vitamin C will help brighten things up, leaving skin looking luminous and healthy. My Skin Matters Brightening Gel Mask With Vitamin C, £3, Sainsbury's, is an effective, hard-working buy. Use every three to four days to…

Chat winners issue 140 (6 Oct 2022) Anyone from your town in the list this week..? Chat PUZZLE 1 360 Chat PUZZLE 2 TRIAGE Chat PUZZLE 11 4 5 2 •Any material submitted to Chat must be original, not copies or duplicated to other editors. Upon submitting material you warrant that you own or have the right to licence the material to Future pic for publication. Chat reserves the right to shorten, edit or modify any material that is…